(Closed) How many hints is too many hints!?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would ask him for a timeline to make sure you are both on the same page as to when you’d both like to be engaged/married.

 

Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

haha I think a lot of guys are the same way, but even if he wants to surprise you and “do his thing” he should be able to say in 6 months or 12 monhts or 2 years is when I want to be engaged. Just my two cents – you have a right to know his general plan for timing.

Post # 6
Member
4887 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Sounds like things are moving right along… I’d probably not mention engagement for another six months and see what happens.  Fill your time with distractions!

Post # 7
Member
31 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@LabDarling:  Maybe he’s got something in mind, but he wants to be in control of the situation. After my SO and I had the marriage discussion that led to us realizing we were coming closer to that ‘ready’ point, I started to pressure him, and eventually flat-out asked, “When??” He put it to me that when it comes to weddings, guys (fe feels) really only have control over the proposal – it’s their moment, and he felt that by putting pressure on him after I already knew how he felt (that I was the one) was taking away from that moment – his moment. I’d never really thought of how important it is to him as well – selfish me!

So if you both feel that you’re ready, I’d suggest sitting back and let it happen. Take it as a blessing in disguise b/c you’ll have plenty of things to control during the planning process ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 8
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Whatever you do just don’t hassle him about it. In the mean time, start browsing ideas. Just try to not overwhelm yourself or him. :]

Post # 9
Member
914 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I am in the same boat, sighs and all! lol. But, I’ll have been waiting 7 years this August Undecided

Post # 12
Member
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@t3al3af:  I agree with this! And I’m currently taking this advice as well.. Because I don’t want to ruin his surprise / plan!

 

@LabDarling:  we’re very alike ๐Ÿ™‚ I’ve been with and living with my guy the same amount of time.. Hey and both from jersey ๐Ÿ™‚ good luck! Waiting is so tough I know! I hope we both don’t have to wait too much longer!

Post # 13
Member
700 posts
Busy bee

@LabDarling:  i am in the same boat, we”ve been together 3+ years, no proposal on the horizon, i am tired of waiting as well but theres no help for it. I can only do so mush pushing before he gets scared , or defensive.

Post # 14
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee

I think its reasonable to ask for a timeline.  When my SO was claiming ignorance and ignoring my questions about marriage i sat him down and said “Look, i’m not asking you to pin point a day, but i want to know if you can promise we will be engaged by the end of the year”.  His response was “Yes, of course”.

Simple as that! That didint necessarily stop me from going insane with the waiting, lol, but i know that if he does NOT propose by the end of the year, we will have a serious issue and i will have to reassess things. 

Post # 15
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

i had no idea mine was ready until he hit one knee. We had casually talked about the future but no concrete plans so it was a huge total surprise when he proposed. I knew what he said at the time but i dont remember anymore because all i can think about is how lucky i am and my beautiful ring that he had to return and because i was crying too hard to really pay attention.

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