Post # 1
Hi! I’m new here and I have been stalking all of these boards 🙂 I need some advice. I have no married or engaged friends Lol! So my wedding will be this time next year. We are planning to invite around 100 guests, assuming 80-90 confirm. I have so many close girlfriends, I couldn’t imagine having a small wedding party. I have already asked 6 girls. My fiancé has 6 guys. I’m debating on adding one more, but starting to regret my decision already! I’m so nervous a big wedding party will look so dumb with a small-med size wedding. A part of me doesn’t care because I love those girls and couldn’t imagine NOT having them as BM’s! Any brides out there have a big wedding party and a not-so big wedding? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!
Post # 3
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@Mick26: IMO 6+ is too many. Stick around and read the horror stories of brides dealing with their BMs.
Post # 4
that sounds like a lot for BMs and GMs. can some of the girls and guys have different honor positions like a reading, handing out programs, etc.
Post # 5
I have 6 and 0 issues. They have been around me for
years. I also don’t need them to do anything so that could be why I dont have issues. But IMO I wouldnt do anymore. I am inviting about 220-230 guests.
Post # 6
@Mick26: Since your wedding isn’t huge, I think 6 would be considered a large bridal party, however its your wedding and you should do what you want.
I have 10 BMs and 7 GMs and don’t regret it at all. I love all of my BMs and couldn’t imagine getting married without them standing up next to me! I also haven’t had a single issue. Personally, I think the issues bride’s have with their BMs comes from having too high of expectations or they aren’t that good of friends to begin with.
Post # 7
Our wedding is approximately the same size… we have 4 BMs & 4 GMs…we haven’t asked really anything of them other than to get their wedding day attire as directed… Its still kind of like pulling teeth though.. perhaps b/c we already have a child and so do several of our party and we all have different commitments but i would say no more than what you already have…
Post # 8
I think anything over 6 is excessive and starts to become impersonal.
I know someone who has 14 bridesmaids. And it’s utterly ridiculous.
Post # 9
@Mick26: 6 is definitely the top number I’d do, regardless of the size of the wedding but especially in yours. You’re inviting 100, so I’m assuming 50 of those are from your side, which means already over 10% of your guests are in the wedding party! That no longer feels that “special”. Plus, even if you all get along famously, have you ever tried to pick a place to eat with that many people? Now imagine trying to pick one dress which they will all be photographed in all day. And those pictures are going to look like a sea of people when the whole party is together.
Post # 10
I have 5 and I have had 0 issues (other than having to remind a few to call in to get their dresses ordered by the deadline…which they finally did). However, I think that a few more than that will start to get excessive…and more expensive! If I had 2 less bridesmaids I’d be saving at least $500!
I’m inviting around 115-120 people.
Post # 11
I have six BMs (and FI has six GM) and I couldn’t be happier with my choice (like a lot of people are saying). I’m inviting around 125-150 people and my venue is a sprawling ranch (75 acres) so I don’t think the bridal party will look “out of place.” If you’re afraid of that, maybe have your BMs sit instead of stand beside you during the ceremony?
I also want to add, I didn’t not appoint any of my girls as Maid/Matron of Honor. This is absolutely a personal choice, but I’m so happy that I did it. I already have one girl that wants to throw the shower, one that wants to give a speech, and two of the others are working with me to make the bachelorette party out of this world. So, I do agree with other PPs that the reason for being “disappointed” in/by your BMs is because one may expect too much out of them.
Do what your heart tells yoU!
Post # 12
Thank you for your replies 🙂 very helpful. I’m not worried so much about any drama with the girls, just more worried that so many people in the bridal party will look unproportional to the amount of guests. Is it normal to fear that no one will be able to make it to your wedding? Haha. Lots of out of towners! this is stressful 🙁
Post # 13
I don’t think the party will look unproportional to the number of guests. I just think after 5 BMs, people tend to get bored by the time the bride gets her turn to come down the aisle.
I would sitck to 5 and find other things for the rest of the girls to do.
Post # 14
@Mick26: I already held this opinion prior to stalking to Bridesmaid boards, but doing so only reinforced my theory that, for us, 1 is too many.
Post # 15
@jwdesiree, I never thought of my bridal party sitting and the MOH and BM standing. That is a genius idea!!
Post # 16
@Mick26: Whoa…I think 5 is the highest I could ever go, but even that is pushing it. When I was picking mine I just kept flashing back to school projects where I had to work with a group of people and how difficult it was to coordinate everything. I chose 4 and I think it’s been perfect that way. I’ll never understand large bridal parties.