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My boyfriend gave me a promise ring on our one year anniversary when we were 21 (we've been dating a little over 2.5yrs now). It is a yellow gold band with a 0.03ct diamond in it! I love and cherish it very much and wear it everyday on my right hand's ring finger. He gave it to me because we were not yet considering marriage at the time but he wanted to give me something to show me and the rest of the world that he was serious about us.
Now that we're planning on getting engaged soon, I picked out an engagement ring that will match the promise ring he gave me all that time ago! I love the idea of the promise ring, the engagement ring and finally the wedding band being symbols of all the stepping stones we took in our relationship :)
I was curious how many other waiting Bees had a promise ring too? What are your opinions on promise rings in general?
I think they are great! I'm engaged but when I had my promise ring, I wore it proudly. We both bought each other them. I think it's a great stepping stone to engagement. It was a commitment more than boyfriend/girlfriend. He still wears his.
I personally don't have one, but I like that you have something to represent the stages of your relationship. That's really cute!
I don't have a promise ring. We've been together for about 3 and a half years and we've been talking about marriage for quite some time. I've gotten some jewelry over the years, but no promise ring!
Yup, I have one! I just posted about it on another thread, but I absolutely love mine and it was something I wanted.
My bf got my promise ring when he was about 7 years old. He told his mom that he was going to give it to his wife when he was older. (Most little boys would have wanted to give it to their moms). He gave it to me when we were at his parents house after we'd been dating about 2 years. He even got down on one knee when he gave it to me and said that he couldn't wait to make me his wife one day and that he'd been saving this ring for me.
Loved it!
My bf is not one to move quickly (like getting engaged quickly) and he gave it to me at a point in our relationship when I needed to know that he was all in! I wear it daily.
I wanted to mention too that I had wanted a promise ring and that I saw it as a stage in our relationship. My mom had a promise ring too and I liked the idea. At the time when he gave it to me, though, I must admit that I wished it was an engagement ring. But everything happens at the right time, no?
@MissBuffalo: Aww that's an adorable story!
I get married in 2 weeks, and my wedding band was once affectionately called a promise ring...it wasn't meant to be my wedding band, but I love it and it compliments my engagement ring perfectly. We will be getting a matching band on our 1yr anniversary that I will put above my engagement ring (if that makes sense...will be promise/wedding band, engagement ring, 1yr anniv ring)
I have a promise ring. My boyfriend gave it to me when we were together for 3 years. At the time I wasn't happy about it being a promise ring, becuase that is when I started to get antsy about *thee ring.* I soon realized that it was a big step for him to do this and I started wearing it proudly. I wear it on my left hand ring finger because that is where he told me he would like me to wear it. I don't mind wearing it on my left hand because I work in an office with 25 people, only 7 of them are females, the promise ring helps me a lot.
Funny story. Recently I have been working out and I have been losing weight. My ring no longer fits as tight as I would like it to, so I wear a bandaid on the back of it. SO and I were eating dinner with my parents and my mom noticed the bandaid and asked why, I explained it to my parents and my dad blurts out "Well I guess you need to upgrade" My mom nudges him and says "Rusty shhhhh" he looks around and starts saying "What did I do, I didn't do anything."
@jtsing: That is really cool that your promise ring will become your wedding band!
@LetsGoPens: Very pretty ring!
My BF saw a few rings at the local highland games over the summer that we both really liked, and from some of the hints he's dropped, that may be what I'm getting for our anniversary or my birthday as a promise ring/right hand ring. I've told him I'd rather he get me something less expensive and put the money in The Ring fund, but I really appreciate the meaning behind it, if that's what he decides to do. I think one of his coworkers may have told him NOT to buy me a ring that isn't an e-ring, though, (though he could also have been telling him not to buy me a Wusthoff knife... the other thing he's let slip that he's thought about getting me for a gift soon), so it may not happen.
I never thought about promise rings until that, but it's neat to hear how other people have them and what they mean in their relationships :)
@LetsGoPens: I love the dinner table story! That's too funny! :)
I don't have a promise ring, but my mom had one and she let me wear it when I was really little. When I got a little older, I realized how important that ring is to her and what it meant for their relationship. I gave it back to her for safe keeping because I'm a very irresponsible person, so I could just imagine myself taking it off and leaving it on a bathroom counter somewhere! Eeeps!
My boyfriend gave me a promise ring on our two year anniversary. It is black hills gold with a june birthstone because we had our first date in june! :)
@bellababy: aw that's cute and thoughtful!
@bellababy: aw that's cute and thoughtful!
N's mom had spoken to him about a promise ring, but knowing I wasn't a huge jewellery person (and I already had a ring on my right hand), so he bought me a teddy bear instead. I haven't slept without it in the 2 years that I've had it, and the one time I did forget it, I had to roll up a sweater to sleep with instead haha.
My FI gave me a promise ring as a sign that we were serious and wanted to be together for good. We had a long-distance relationship so it was nice to look at when he was away. We weren't financially ready for marriage at the time and we were still living in different states. People asked me if I would trade in or stop wearing my promise ring when I got my Engagement ring. Of course not. It just reminds me of how far we've come and it is really sentimental to me.
i have one! the mister gave it to me on our 1st anniversary [we've been together for 5 years now]. we're in a long distance relationship so marriage at that moment definitely wasn't feasible though it was what we both wanted and are working towards. i have been noticing lately when we do visit, that he plays with the ring a whole lot more than he did before. one day we'll finally upgrade it.
Personally, I dont like the idea of a promise ring.
This may come off as bratty, but to me, they seem kind of juvenile, like something you give to your highschool girlfriend.
To me, they say "I love you and all, but I'm not going to ask you to marry me anytime soon. So I am getting you this to shut you up so you wont bug the crap out of me about getting married."
Again, this is just MY personal opinion. I understand how people may see it as a sign that he is stepping up and taking a big step to a large commitment. I personally just don't see if that way. If I am going to wear a ring on my left ring finger (where typically, a promise ring is meant to be worn) it's going to be an engagement ring. Otherwise, I'm going to have everyone coming up to me "OOOOH AHHH! OH!! You're engaged!!!!" then you have to explain "No, I'm not engaged. He has just promised that SOMEDAY we might get engaged." it's just a big hassle.
@Young.love: way to rain on everybody's parade.... why would you even bother posting that comment?
Anyway, I had something we called a promise ring but it wasn't really. My husband gave me a ring that he has had since he was like 13 and has worn it always. One day, a few years before we got engaged, we were out seeing our friends play some music and he took my hand and put it on me, i could tell it meant alot to him to give it to me! it was nothing special, just a cheap ring with a geometric pattern on it, but it meant so much to me! i wore it on my right hand. then i went and lost it cuz it fell off my finger when i was shopping in Chicago... my fingers have a tendency to swell and shrink so it must have just slipped off :( i was SO SAD!! it was awful. it had slipped off before but i had noticed it then. also my friend has one, her BF gave her his family crest ring to wear as a promise ring, tho of course it's way too big for her so she wears it on a chain around her neck. they both just graduated law school and are studying for the bar, so there is no way he can get a ring anytime soon. Nor could they think about paying for a wedding anytime soon, so the promise ring was a very sweet gesture as I know she would love for it to happen sooner than later.
@MissBuffalo: ADORABLE!! what a sweet story!! your BF has obviously always been a romantic at heart, you're a lucky girl!
I have a promise ring! I got it when we had been dating for almost a year (not exactly sure) and had just turned 21. We were (and still aren't) ready for marriage but knew our relationship was headed in that direction eventually. It is a symbol of a promise that one day we will be married. I believe it is a 3 stone 0.25 t.w. diamond ring set in white gold.
@Young.love: I'm only 22 and would not want an engagement ring right now. We aren't in a place to be getting married as we are both students. Our parents still support us a great deal and I know there is no way we could afford to support ourselves. Neve rmind that I have a heart condition so I need to stay on my mom's amazing health insurance until I have a stable job. I don't want a 3+ year engagement but the ring symbolizes that we are most serious than most couples our age. And I never once pressured him for marriage or a ring, he actually wears a ring by choice too!
@young.love- Yup, you were right. Very bratty. Why post? No one interested in this thread would want to read that. I don't know why you'd choose to be contrary and mean. Bleh.
I had a adorable pearl promise ring which FI gave to me about one year after we started dating. I wore the ring for 2+ years until we got engaged. I definitely don't think promise rings are around to "shut [us] up." I thought it was the perfect sentiment at the time and I loved wearing something meaningful and symbolic.
@Young.love: You're right. Your post does come off as bratty. Just because it "seems like something you'd get in highschool" doesn't mean it is. Way to throw everyone into one category without knowing any specific details. Your opinion is juvenile. Not to mention closed minded.
I think I defended promise rings pretty well in this post. Go read that.
I didn't wear a promise ring. I think I was afraid that if I received a promise ring, it would make receiving the engagement ring a little less special (this is just my thought, since I didn't go that route, I can't say for sure how it would have worked out). I think some people were a little harsh on Young.Love. The post was asking who wore promise rings and their opinions on them, and the poster shared.
However, seeing the sentimental value that the promise ring has for some of you is really cool! If it would have been a family thing, or if it would have carried that sentimentality that it does for the others for me, I would definitely have different opinions about the topic. For us, it was the way we viewed the promise ring, but everyone is different, right?
I can also understand what some said, wanting an "outward symbol of commitment". I received a three stone necklace from my fiance before we got engaged that I would always wear (and still do!). Now that we are engaged, my fiance is bummed that he doesn't have an outward symbol, like I do.
@deathbydesign and EVERYONE else that posted negative against Young.love. In the OP it asked, What are your opinions on promise rings in general? I think THAT'S why she probably answered in the way she did. The question was asked and she answered! She went on to say that it was a PERSONAL decision.
As someone who was given 2 promise rings by 2 different people and not one by my FH, I find what she says to ring true. In HS it was a huge deal to have a promise ring. My first BF gave me one and I thought it was so awesome, but then when we broke up and I started dating the next guy I practically demanded one, since I'd had one before I wanted another one. Well that relationship didn't last, surprise surprise. But my point is that sometimes that can be good, but in my case it really was basically a "shut up" ring so I don't have a great image of them, but thats because of my expereience. A girl I work with has one and cherishes it in much the same manner as some here, for her it has meaning, but for me a promise ring isn't a big deal.
WOW! I didn't realize that my comment would get so much negative attention!
The OP asked an opinion, and I gave it. It's great if everyone else likes promise rings, and I'm glad that it's something that is so special to you all. I just personally don't like them and really don't see the point. IT'S JUST AN OPINION!!!!!
I have never had a promise ring, never really had a desire to have one either. Just not my thing, different strokes for different folks.
Mr. C gave me a promise ring on our one year anniversary, when he was 17 and I was 18. He gave it to me because I was getting ready to go off to college, and he was staying in the town where we grew up. It was extremely special to me, but we have both agreed that if we weren't in high school at the time he would have skipped the promise ring and just waited until we were ready to get engaged.
I was curious how many other waiting Bees had a promise ring too? What are your opinions on promise rings in general?
I take it what you meant to say was "everyone who thinks promise rings are awesome, give your general opinions..." right? I mean, how else do you explain the mini-dogpile on Young.love? Or this thread in general, since there already is one (which you've been so kind as to link to) where there's a pretty even split of opinions? Next time, don't ask for people's general opinions if you only want one specific kind.
Calling her opinion juvenile? Pot, meet kettle.
I had a promise ring. I love it and still wear it sometimes even though I am married and have an ering and wedding ring. It's yellow gold, two rows of small channel set diamonds swirled together. It looks like a wedding ring. :-) I loved it then and still love it now......
I asked for opinions, not the outright bashing of other bees. There is a difference. She was rude and inflammatory. She could have worded her comment in a much less nasty way and it would not have insulted so many.
This post is here because I was wondering how many waiting bees had promise rings. Didn't mean to start such a sh*t storm.
I had a promise ring in high school. I met DH in my mid-20s, and I would not have been happy if he gave me a promise ring. At this point in my life, it's an engagement ring, or nothing at all. Just my opinion... I don't care if others have and love promise rings... they're just not for me.
I think it's a really sweet sentiment, and I can see how emotional some of the bees are about their promise rings. What matters is to them it's an important symbol of their relationship, and they don't view it as a juvenile practice. If someone else does, oh well, you're not wearing that bee's promise ring. My preference is to have an actual engagement ring, and at this stage in MY individual relationship--if I was to get a promise ring instead I'd probably choke him with it, but I love these stories and pics!
I didn't see her bashing anyone, she was explaining how she viewed promise rings. On the contrary, you calling her opinion juvenile and close-minded was bashing. I think maybe you're a bit sensitive and defensive about the subject in general.
Everyone is entitled to their opinion.
ha! For reals!
@Young.love: You have your right to your opinion :) But promise rings are not only meant to "shut up" girlfriends. There are couples I know that have a promise ring(s) as a sign of chastity. It's not "I love you but I'm not ready," but "I love you and want to show everyone our commitment."
@misstiny: Thank you for not crucifying me for having a different opinion! LOL!
All I was saying was I PERSONALLY view them in this way. I DID NOT say that this is the way they SHOULD be viewed in todays society or that any other bee has to agree with me. I agree, that deathbydesign has a bit of a personal chip on her shoulder about this. Learn to take things with a grain of salt dear....That's why it's called an OPINION.
@Young.love: i think all the negative responses came from the fact that your post read as in you were talking in a very bratty, judgmental tone. so it's no surprise that people took offense. this started out as a let's-share-the-love post, so to blatantly rain on everyone's parade like that was pretty insensitive. yes the OP asks for your opinion... but having read the following posts you should have known that your post was inappropriate. if the thread is full of people having a happy conversation, why be the debbie downer? I know you have your right to your own opinion, that's not the question here. it was how you chose to express it.
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