(Closed) How many people to expect to actually show up vs invitiations?

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

YES.

I guess you will be safe… but do not invite 70 when you can max have only 60. We had an abolsute MAX. of 140 people we invited over 200. BUT, we never had more than 140 invites out. We sent the obvious family/ best friends first, lots of out of town guests declined, then we sent out more, then got more declines, then sent out more.

 

I don’t care about the anti “B C list” argument either.

Post # 4
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

@lazybee123:  Ya, it’s too dangerous. We only had 4 people decline, and our wedding is out of state for 90% of the our guests. I’ve heard 10% is the norm but you really never know.

Post # 5
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

@vmec:  I like this idea a lot, sending out invites once the declines come in.  But how early did you send out invitations, and how long did it take for people to RSVP?  I feel like this could get tricky too close to the actual date.

I’ve heard that 10 or 20% declines is normal but you always hear of people getting a 99% yes rate, so inviting over your means definitely has its dangers.

Post # 6
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

It is dangerous. But you really have to look at your guest list and circumstances – I think it’s silly to say you can never over-invite.

We’re inviting some former coworkers that live in California where he is in full-time grad school. They are NOT COMING. But we really like them and wanted them to feel included, but there’s no way they are coming.

We gave everyone an and guest – including 85 year old grandmothers who will not be bringing someone, from their own mouths. My aunt, who is sharing a room with my grandmother (and hence won’t be bringing a guest), got an and guest. I’m inviting someone who lives a 6 hour plane ride away who lives in a nursing home out of respect – and gave her an and guest. Not coming. So you need to do some projections.

Our venue is a minimum of 2 hours away from everyone on the list, 2.5 – 3.5 for the majority. For a decent part of the guest list, the travel & lodging would be a financial challenge. For that reason, we know for sure there is a larger than normal contingency that won’t be coming. Plus, we extended our guest list out into more casual acquaintances/professional colleagues, not just close friends & family.

We’re inviting 250 and expecting about 150 to come. My venue, in my perfect setup, seats about 160. We can easily seat up to 200 although we’d need to possibly switch to banquet tables and make a few other changes. Worst case scenario, we COULD seat all 250, we’d just have to do ceremony and reception in the same area rather than split how we have it now, or allow for a room flip (not happening).

It is “risky” to invite extra people but you really have to know your guest list. We did the estimates about 6 different ways and consistently came out between 135 – 170, so I feel fine. And I am a very conservative person when it comes to being cautious. It just makes sense with the types of people we invited, the distance (and it’s not in a “destination” city that people would extend into a vacation, and it’s not easy to fly into as it is a small town), and that we gave everyone an and guest.

Only you can really look at your guest list. Are you inviting 70 that live within an hour of the wedding and only inviting people you’re close with and not giving tons of and-guests? Yeah, may be risky.

Post # 7
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Is 60 including the wedding party?

Post # 8
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

You should always make sure you have enough seats for EVERYONE you invite, even though they won’t all show up. We invited 190 and our final count is 130 but you never want to count on people not showing up.

Post # 10
Member
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It probably means 80 for a cocktail reception, i.e. fewer tables and chairs, more places for people to stand.  You need to clarify with the venue.

I generally think that you can get away with over-inviting just a bit, but the smaller your guest list is, the fewer declines you’re going to get because the guests are closer and will make more of an effort to attend.  So in your case, I wouldn’t invite 10 extra people.  Maybe 2-3 at the outside.

Post # 11
Member
1866 posts
Buzzing bee

@lazybee123:  The chances are likely that 10 people won’t show up; however it’s just too risky to invite 70 if the venue only holds 60 b/c what happens if everyone says yes?

Post # 12
Member
883 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@lazybee123:  We paid for 60 people upfront. But then the inviting got way out of hand. We ended up inviting over 72 people. We have our final head count now and we will only have 50 people. So It depends on if you are sure everyone will come or not.

Post # 13
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@elysion:  I sent out my “round 1” invites late January for my May 12 wedding. I asked for them back March 15th. I had tons of replies (both no and yes) by early March. I would send out “round 2, 3 and 4” as the NO’s came in.

Post # 15
Member
136 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@vmec:  I like your idea of doing round 1, 2 and 3. I’m just curious if you had different “respond by” dates on each round? Like have round 1 respond 2 weeks before round 2 and so on.

Post # 16
Member
136 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@lazybee123: I’m glad that you got it worked out. I know I am stressing about how we are going to fit people too haha 

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