Post # 1
I have recently come to the conclusion that I am very lucky to be a waiting bee. I have an SO that is extremely supportive and has encouraged me to pursue my dream, even though it means delaying plans to get engaged/married/start a family. Not being engaged right now has given me the freedom to focus on what I need to do to accomplish my personal goals before taking that next step in our relationship.
Of course we all have bad waiting days or go through periods of time where we want nothing more than to be engaged/married, but how many Waiting Bees are actually content to be in the waiting phase? Is there anyone else that’s actually enjoying the wait?
Post # 3
I won’t say I’m “enjoying” it, just because, heck yes I want a ring on my finger! Lol
But I see your point too and I totally agree. RRR is super supportive too. I’m in nursing school, so that takes up a lot of time…
It’s good to not have the stress of wedding planning too. So for the most part, I’m happy to be waiting, because I know it’s going to happen.
Post # 4
I just want us to be financially and emotionally stable and to make sure that the proposal comes at a good moment. That there will be no arguments or anything before or after it, and that we will really be at a peak in our loving relationship. So, while I dream and talk about it a lot, I don’t expect or really want it that soon. We went through some hard times, and I just want us to be stable and happy with each other first.
Post # 5
I go back and forth but I’m mostly happy. I know we have a good relatonship and I know we’re doing what we need to do to have a good life in the future but it’s still hard some days. Getting engaged now and having a very long engagement would be better to me but that’s most likely not happening and I’m mostly ok with it, it really depends on the day though.
Post # 6
I think, at this point, I’m more resigned to waiting. I wouldn’t say I was happy but I’m not upset about it either. We’re on the same page and have valid reasons for waiting but I know I’ll feel relieved when this stage is over because it’ll mean we’re both working full time and finally in the same zip code. That’s a lot riding on the engagement.
Post # 7
Part of me would love to be engaged. The other more reasonable part wants to make sure we are 100% emotionally prepared for something as long term and challenging as marriage. We are reading the 5 languages of love and seeing a counselor to clear ups some communication issues. His parents terrible relationship kinda made him a little relationship UN-savy. So, we want to make sure we have a strong foundation, that we’re in the right place mentally for an engagement. We still have the ball rolling with the making the ring, but it seemed unwise to just sit around twiddling our thumbs when we could be sorting out some hickups and asking the really tough questions about our relationship before it was too late. 🙂 All in good time.
Post # 8
I am so ready to be engaged!!! I’m not miserable waiting, but about once a month I get resentful/bitter when I think about the things that are holding us back… But I know that we’ss get there.. so I try to stay positive.
Post # 9
Marriage has always been really important to me, and my SO knew that from (pretty much) the word go!. To be honest, I am in no hurry to get engaged or to get married. But I know he’s going to propose (my Dad told me SO had asked) and that’s what makes it difficult. I’d rather not know know, it’s become a distraction.
Post # 10
@claireos: That’s a very smart approach you guys are taking!
Post # 11
Although I would love to be engaged and sometimes I feel like the thought of it consumes me, I am fine with waiting. I love my SO and he has made it clear that he sees me in his future and we are very happy. We are both finishing up school and it would be nice for us to actually physically be together on a regular basis before we move forward.
Post # 12
Now that he is designing the ring I’m happy to wait. 🙂
Before that though it was a mess. After as long as we had been together I needed that validation that he wanted to spend his life with me and build a family with me. It’s hard not to think that, as much as you love that person, if they don’t feel the same way (and might not ever) that you’re wasting precious time you could have spent with someone who does feel that way.
Post # 13
I am fine waiting now. I guess it’s because I have a timeline, I’m aware of the fact he is actively planning a proposal, and he has encouraged me to think of wedding ideas. Some days are hard, but most are good. Within the last few months our relationship has really grown and we are making positive steps in our relationship.
Post # 14
I’m glad so many agree that they’re mostly fine with waiting. I’m overcooked, and this thing needs to happen ASAP! After 6 years together, moving several states away from family to follow him 2 years ago, and living together for a year, it’s time. I’d probably be better with it if his words/actions weren’t so inconsistent. It feels painful to think about, and I’ve shared with him that it’s causing me pain. 3 months ago I asked him to give me a deadline, and he said he could do it in 6 months. While I’m not with him every second, I don’t get the feeling that he’s made any progress since we last spoke about it 3 months ago. It hurts me even more to think that I’ve shared with him how much his inconsistency/complacency hurts me, and knowing that, he hasn’t really done anything. He tells me he’s ready, he has the money for a ring (even though I told him I don’t care if there’s a ring at all), and nothing. I hate the idea of ultimatums, but I’m really starting to consider one for my own sanity.
Post # 15
I’m done. I hate to say it, but December is 3yrs, and I’m at the end of my rope. I don’t care about being engaged or a wedding, I’m down for the courthouse, long s the end result is married.LOL
In other words, the Zales website I found on the computer better have some results soon.
Post # 16
@MsMamaBear: Oh exciting! You mean you saw he was on the Zales website?