Post # 1
as someone that didnt live with my hubby before we married – this info would have been helpful!
anyone else spotting their spouse/FI in this???
How To Shower Like a Woman
Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror – make mental note to do more sit-ups, leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it’s clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tile cleaner.
Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas
How To Shower Like a Man
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the ‘woo-woo’ sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the of your willy and scratch your bum.
Get in the shower.
Wash your face Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair.
Make a Shampoo Mohican
Rinse off and get out of shower
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.
Admire willy in mirror again Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the ‘woo-woo’ sound again..
Throw wet towel on bed
Post # 3
lol sounds about right. i remember the first time my bf and i showered together he was like.. ohhh… thats why it takes you so long. Was also amazed i keep face wash in the shower, what a novel idea! heh.
Post # 4
actually this had me at “woo woo”…….. thats so my hubby
Post # 5
HAHA! I love this. Some of this is SO true, and some of it is funny to think about. I live with my FH so I am used to it. I have been here a year though and I am STILL to this day trying to get him to put his laundry in the right baskets!! Is it really that hard..
White basket is for whites, red is for colors, blue is for jeans, and then there is one(forgot the color) for towels! Not too complex!
Post # 6
Lol, that is pretty much how it goes. So funny!
Post # 8
the woman part is a little ridiculous, but the male part is pretty dang funny.
Post # 9
Everything on man side sounds accurate except for the towel-around-waist part, he just gets out of the shower and dances naked around the house until (much thrusting of pelvis, arms thrown up, flailing around) he has my attention 😛
Post # 10
That is so funny!! WHY do guys blow their nose in the shower?? Seriously.
Post # 11
… my boyfriend showers more like a woman and I shower more like a man! Honestly, I HATE being wet. That includes showers, so I’ll get in, wash my hair, lather up, shave and get out. He’ll take 30 minutes just to wash his HAIR!
Post # 12
@eloping: this had me at ‘woo woo’ too. I literally almost fell off my chair I was laughing so hard.
My FI takes a bath & reads, followed by a shower. lol I hate baths… I remember the first time I “caught” him taking a bath. The look on his face was priceless!
Post # 13
I used to date a guy that would do the “woo hoo” at me. Not hot. Dh likes to dance like a male dancer in his undies on his way to the bathroom for me. Cracks me up every time =]
Shoot, what woman showers like that?!?!? haha, fancy women must =]
He’s totally weirded out that i blow my nose in the shower, too. I have a rainforest waterfall faucet and it always ends up in my nose! =]
Or i’m just really gross. Whatever.
Post # 14
lol that is so incredibly accurate! i just read it to FI, he agrees… haha. thanks for the laughs!
Post # 15
The wet towel on the bed – I just don’t get it! And it drives me crazy!
Post # 16
AHAHAHAHAH!!!! Love it, sooooo true!