How much did your parents help you with?

posted 2 years ago in Money
  • poll: Would you ask your parents for that much?
    Yes : (28 votes)
    48 %
    No : (19 votes)
    33 %
    You're low balling, ask for more : (5 votes)
    9 %
    You're being greedy ask for less and figure out the rest your self : (6 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 2
    Hostess
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    He did offer to help, and he asked you for a number, so I would just tell him that you have $4000 left to pay off, and tell him that anything would help.

    My parents bought some alcohol [about $300 worth] for our $14,000 wedding. FMIL & FFIL purchased their daughters [my bm] bridesmaid dress [$160]. Otherwise, we’ve paid for everything ourserlves.

    Post # 3
    Member
    291 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    He offered to help, thats the number you need help with, so send it to him! Don’t be scared. You are NOT being a greedy brat. AT ALL.

    My parents paid for my wedding 100%.

    Post # 4
    Member
    8426 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    If he offered to help, I think he would like to know the amount you actually need.

    Post # 5
    Member
    942 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I would tell him how much you have left over ($4000) and see what he would like to contribute.

    My parents paid for the whole wedding. Their original budget was $6k but I think it ended up being more like $9k.

    Post # 6
    Member
    9533 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Since he offered to help and asked you for a number, I would let him know that, currently, you need $4000 and would be very grateful if he could help with some or all of this amount. Then see what he says. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1701 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    Since he offers to help tell him the number if he can pay the remaining balance he will write the check for it or whatever he can give he will give it to just talk to him he is your after all dimt be scared.

    Post # 8
    Member
    6513 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Our parents helped out more than that but there isn’t one ‘right’ number for everything. I think you should let him know that you’re struggling to come up with the $4000 and tell him that any amount will be extremely helpful.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3165 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    My dad put in about 4500$ and my mom 1500$ so roughly 6k of the 20k wedding. I didn’t ask, they just gave me checks after I got engaged. i would tell your dad what you owe and say anything he can contribute would be greatly appreciated 🙂

    Post # 10
    Member
    1568 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    We are in the same boat my parents are paying about 5k for the wedding, my In laws around 3K and we are paying 3K

    Post # 11
    Member
    1779 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    My in laws gave us $1,000 towards the wedding and paid for a pretty lavish rehearsal dinner. My parents contributed $7,500. It was a surprise for my birthday about 3 weeks before the wedding. I was shocked and so, so appreciative. $4,000 is a resonable number if that’s what you actually need and they offered to help.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2725 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    If you combined everything my parents gave,  i’d say it was about $8k. Plus my sister was my MOH, and she and my mom threw us a couples bbq instead of a shower,  and I know my parents paid for all the food and liquor for 60 people. 

    I think it depends on their financial situation…for some people 4k is a lot. For others,  not really.  If you’re worried,  why don’t you offer to pay a portion back? 

    Post # 13
    Member
    59 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

     

    NurseMandie:  My parents gave us $2,000 towards the wedding and also $500 towards my dress. The in laws are hosting the rehearsal dinner for 40 of our friends (and their SO) and some of the immediate family. Other then that we have paid for everything else of our $11,000 wedding! I would just be honest with your dad and say that you appreciate that he is willing to help and that the last bit costs $4,000 and that he can help with what he feels comfortable with. I did that with my parents when they asked how muchI was going to need. I told them the budget for the wedding, told them that they choose what they were comfortable paying with. They then surprised me with the dress part when I went to buy it!  Good luck!

    Post # 14
    Member
    2892 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    NurseMandie: neither of our parents are helping us at all. Why not ask your parents for whatever they’d like to contribute, and see if you can trim back anywhere else?

    The other alternative is to hope that you get enough envelopes at your wedding to cover the gap. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    1441 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I would never take money from my family for my wedding. 

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