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My mom always taught me to buy a wedding gift to help offset the cost of their wedding. For example, if my plate cost $30, then I should buy/give something around $30 or more. I guess it would depend on your stage of life too and if you could afford something more or less. I was always a student up until now so I was always broke. I heard a girl say she typically gave $400 to each wedding she went to. I think if it was my relative or someone close to me, I would give $100 or more.
I usually give something right around the $100 mark, but that depends on who the person is & how close I am to them.
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The amount I spend depends on if I traveled and how close I am to the couple. I give at least $50 but have given up $150.
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I usually spend about $50, depending on how close the person is. If it's a friend, I'll spend that much, but also give lingerie or another girly gift.
It probably depends on where you and where the couple are in life (as far as having money to spend!)
Ive been in most of the weddings ive been too... So I have spent less (around $30) because I was spending alot of money on other items (dress, shoes, travel, etc.) I also think it depends how much the couple already has. If they are just starting off and have NOTHING then maybe i'll chip in for a little extra something :)
If I am buying for just me, around $50. If I am bringing a date, around $100.
I think it depends on the region and how nice the wedding is. I usually give 150-200. If I go solo or if it is not a good friend, 100.
one of the things i struggle with is how much to give as a couple. do you give $50-$100 each? because $200 seems like a lot for us. all of the weddings we've been to in the last 2 years have been mr. onion's cousins...so they are all family. this is a difficult thing for sure.
I was absolutely amazed at how generously people gave at our wedding. It was a reminder to me to give what we can to the couple based on where we currently are in our lives. So for now, we will continue to give $100+ but someday, I hope to give much more than that.
Depends on how close the friend is, but usually $100-200 since I've been working. I gave around $50-100 when I was a student.
I usually spend at least $100.00. Weddings are expensive in New England, Bosotn weddings are upwards of $40,000.00, so I think guests tend to be more generous. I think it also has to do with the cost of living. If you live in an area where you don't make/need as much, I think $100.00 would be a lot.
I usually spend around 80 to 100 I will go lower if I spent a lot to travel and stay near the wedding. That is more then fair, if it is close family like my brothers or something I spend around 100.
I always try to cover the cost of my plate and then some. It also depends on how close I am to the couple. If I'm not that close I'll give $100 but if it's a family member or close friend I'll give more.
I do think that this is a cultural and reginal thing. In my culture, large wedding gifts are the norm and it's not uncommon to give a couple hundred to someone who's not even a close friend or family member.
typically around $50, with some variability. for me it depends on the person and our relationship. if it is someone i know well and am close to, i will spend a little more.
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I always try to buy registry items when they are on sale, so generally I spend $100-120 and they get something worth $120-150 (from both FH and I). I don't base my decision on cost per plate, because I never understood why my friend with an expensive wedding should get a better gift than my friend with a simple wedding!
My FH and I always give $200...more if we are very close with the person. .. When i was in school I gave $100 and figured people would be understanding. Most of our friends give $200-$300. I guess it depends on where you are from.
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when I was younger, it was more like $20! but now it would probably be $50 to $200 depending on how close...I almost feel guilty about how little I spent when I was younger & am starting to realize what a bad guest I was, now that I'm planning my wedding @ 29!
We've only been to a couple of weddings, but gave around $100 depending on who it was. Now that we've had our wedding and have our list of who gave what that number is going to change for future weddings we go to. It might not sound right, but that's our plan. E.g. 2 of my husband's cousins are getting married next year and they both just put their names on a card with their parents. That would be fine, if they included their own gift, but didn't, they just signed their names. Both we also already engaged at our wedding. So, since they gave us nothing, but their plates were about $80 each we aren't sure what we are giving them yet, but it's for sure NOT going to be $100.
It's changed over the past few years since I got out of school. I used to be able to give ~$75 as a student, but having a job helps. Now we generally give $200 in cash/check (where at least 1 of the couple is asian) plus a small-med gift; size of that gift depends on how close we are to the couple.
We're in the SF bay area if that makes a difference. I know things can be a lot more expensive out here.
my mother always told me that we should try to cover the cost of our plate. so definitely no less than $50 for each person (me + my date makes $100). Of course if it's a close friend I'd give more.
It definitely depends on who the person is. Sometimes sentimental doesn't cost a lot. I love when people I don't know very well have a registry, which makes it easier to buy non-sentimental items.
Wow, now I feel cheap since I generally shoot for around $50. But I almost always spend >$300-$1200 (and now double with the FH) traveling to most weddings I go to, so it really starts to hurt financially (especially when I was a student and it was often a few a year). I guess I really don't expect big gifts from anyone least of all if they travel long distances, so maybe I just project the same attitude on my friends.
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Most of our friends/relatives weddings have been on the east coast, so we are always traveling from the opposite coast, but we still spend around $100 on a gift, more if we are really close and can swing it. I guess we try to give what we'd like to receive without going crazy.
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It really depends on how close I am to the couple. Two of my good friends from HS got married within the past year, July and October, and I spent about $75 on their wedding gift. However, considering I had a part in each of the bridal showers ($30) and bachelorette party ($50 fo gift alone) I take that into consideration, too.
We were at a wedding in December and I gave less (only $40) but that was mainly because I knew our company would be laying off dozens of people within the next few weeks and I had to think practical and give conservatively (luckily I did not lose my job). Now I feel a little guilty for only giving $40 and in fact I still haven't received a Thank You card.
I guess it would depend how close I am to the couple. Lately, it's been $100.
Depends on much I have to spend to attend...If its local, $100-$150; its we have to fly and get a room, etc, its usually about $50.
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It depends on the situation I think -- I've only been to one wedding since leaving school, so most of the weddings I've attended in the past I had to give cheaper gifts just because I couldn't afford anything better! But now I'd probably give up to $100, depending on how well I knew the couple =).
It really depends on where and who's wedding I'm going to. I generally check with other people that are also going to the wedding to see what the going rate is.
Generally I give $100 for weddings I attend alone. With both of us we would do $200 for close friends. Relatives are another story.
I've heard from a friend that the going rate in NYC is $400 per couple for close friends. That scares me.
It usually evens out to around $150 - $200. For closer friends and relatives, it will be on the higher side. Co-workers, distant friends/family tend to be on the lower end. I guess it also depends on the gifts on their registry.
Entirely depends on the situation- i.e., region, culture, and closeness of relationship. However, regardless of how much we spend to get there or stay the night, we give at least $150. For closer friends, we give $200-$250. One of my best friends recently got married, and even though we traveled to her wedding and I was in it, we gave them $100 and a gift that cost about $200. When we can't attend a wedding, if it is a close friend we would give the same amount, whereas if we don't feel we even know why we were invited, we give $50-$100. I have given $50 when I have been invited without a date and also was not able to go.
Being in NYC, the per plate charge is pretty pricey so I always give that plus some. It's ranging in the $150 - $200. And yes, I double that when bringing a date.
I have always been puzzled by the "cover the cost of the plate" rule. In my family, they may think the plate was $50.00, when in reality it is so much more. I actually don't want them to know how much it is per person.
That said, I give on average 100.00 at a wedding. I prefer to give gifts, but I try and spend around a 100 or so, depending on the person.
It seems to depend on where you are from. As a couple, we give a minimum of $250, more if we are super close with the couple, regardless of how much I spend to be at the wedding (travel, etc.) Also, I've never brought a "gift" to a wedding, its always a card with money. As a general, unspoken, rule where I'm from. Gifts are for showers, money is for the wedding.
I agree that it depends on how close you are with the couple, or if you had to travel far to attend, but generally I give $50-$100 to the couple. But I have given more than $100.
I've heard that generally the amount you give should close to match the price of the dinner plate.
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I live in Spain and have been to 4 weddings this year here in Spain and 2 weddings this year in New York (of the 6 we had to travel to and pay for a hotel for 5 of them). In Spain the tradition is to give the same amount as the plate would cost, and here they tend to spend quite a big on the food, so it iguals to about 100€ per person ($130). In the states we gave $200 and $160 (because the wedding was cheap and the food didn't cost them much). I asked my grandmother this question and she told me that it's typical to give $50! I think that her idea is quite dated! I will say, I don't expect to get much from my family when I get married bc they tend to be quite tight with money. 
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I really disagree with the cost per plate guideline as I see many issues with this theory:
- Most guests have no idea how much the food/drinks actually cost at a wedding and most will grossly under- or over-estimate.
- The gift is supposed to be in celebration of marriage, not in compensation for the dinner the couple provided to you!
- The couple is the one choosing the cheap/average/expensive meal based on personal reasons, the amount they pick should have nothing to do with your gift. Just because they can't afford a $100 meal does not mean they don't deserve a $100 gift. At the same time, just because the couple chose to pay $200 a plate does not mean you should give them more money because they had a more extravagant wedding.
I always give gifts based on how close I am to the couple combined sometimes with the financial circumstances of the couple. I would never give less because they were wealthy, but I may give a little more to a couple who I know are struggling.
I think it really depends on a lot of things. ( Venue, type of reception, relation to the couple, etc. )
I usually give around $80-$100 a person. When I'm in the bridal party, I usually give a little more depending on my financial situation. I usually give cash or check as well, and usually get a gift for the shower that would be around $50 or more depending on how close I am to the bride.
http://from-i-will-to-i-do.blogspot.com/2009/03/wedding-gifts-do-or-dont.html
This might be a helpful read.
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for several weddings right after HS I made custom quilts designed by the B&G and a small $30 gift. but i try to be around the $100 mark and over.
FI and I typically give $200 at the wedding cash or check. If we are closer it can be higher. I spend about $50 on shower gifts. If I am in the wedding i spend more money on the gift etc. because these are my closest friends and I knew what I was getting into financially when I agreed to do it. While I would not be upset if a guest I knew travelled very far gave a smaller gift but at the same time I personally do not allow that to make me give less. One thing I must confess that I'm embarassed about when we first started daitng I was right out of college he is older and several friends got married far away and we couldn't attend and we didn't send a gift. Makes me cringe thinking about it
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