Post # 1
How much is your future husband really helping. Besides giving input and “getting fitted” FH hasn’t done much and I sit here now and wonder “seriously if he isn’t helping me now what will our future be like?” Am I over reacting? In all honesty I don’t have a lot of people that are helping my, my mom and sis have pretty much taken care of the favors which I appreciate but everything else has fallen on me. And with 3 weeks left I’m feeling drained, stressed and overwhelmed!
Post # 3
My husband did a great job helping out 🙂 I think you should ask him to help you do something simple (work on favors with your mom? etc) with you. Tell him, in a NON attacking way, that’d you’d really like his help. I don’t think that his not helping out is a sign…maybe he doesn’t know what to help with or doesn’t want to step on your planning toes 🙂
Post # 4
Not as much as I wish he would. He has the purse strings so when he would say he didn’t think it was necessary to book this yet or figure out that yet I felt guilty. I havent been able to put any money into the wedding and neither have my parents and I feel exptremely guilty planning a wedding when I don’t have any control over the financials.
I know I should get over it, he’ll be my husband in 19 days.. but its just a matter of pride. The brides family should be helping (or at least the bride somewhat) and yet I can’t…. which made me not want to plan as much.
Post # 5
Mine’s being a poo-head about it. He’s not helping at all!!! He’s very excited about our actual marriage, talking about our future and saying he can’t wait to be married to me. But he is NOT excited about the wedding!!!! He won’t even go to Bed Bath & Beyond to help me with the registry… whatever, he’ll have no right to complain about my choices! I’ll just go with some girlfriends!
I wouldn’t worry about it too much – guys just aren’t into the whole wedding thing, it doesn’t mean anything about your relationship or future marriage. My Fiance is great with everything else.
Your family however, THEY should be helping more!!
Post # 6
My husband barely helped. If i wanted him to help, I would have sent him a list and said, “do this”. I did that with liquor. With tuxes. That was about it. I did the registry online myself, sent him the link, he added stuff, etc. I think he was grateful, actually, haha. But he’s incredibly helpful in real life–I just think planning a wedding (aka big ole party) isn’t most dude’s cup of tea so they aren’t chompin’ at the bit to help out. Making things pretty and cute certainly isn’t something my SO is good at!!!!
Post # 7
My fiance is very involved…we make every decision together even on decor!
Post # 8
Ha! Too bad you didn’t have the option ‘he is doing all the planning, and all I have to do is show up and look pretty’!. In all seriousness, my Fiance is really doing all the planning. With me living in Canada, it is just easier that way. Besides, I am waaaay too indecisive :s
Post # 9
Mine likes to spout off ridiculous ideas to make me crazy, but he has flat out said “this is your day. I don’t give a rip about colors, flowers, or clothes. All I care about is friends, food, and alcohol.” Guess what I’m putting him in charge of? Food and alcohol.
Post # 10
I do the research, show him the top 3 picks and then get his input. So far so good because everything he’s chosen was the same one I chose (and I didn’t even tell him!!). He hates the planning part, all the research and what not. But this way he feels somewhat involved. Also, he does help out with the DIY stuff. I just have to show him how and he’s on it. 🙂
Post # 11
He doesn’t really care about details, but I did ask him to take care of certain things like booking our hotel room and working with his parents to coordinate the rehearsal dinner. If I didn’t ask him to do certain things, I doubt he’d ask if I needed help though. Sigh, boys.
Post # 12
My Fiance has probably done about 35-40% of our planning/executing. 🙂 He’s wonderful!
Post # 13
FH has prob done less then 5%. I am happy that now when i ask if he likes something i actully get a yes or no! we are making progress!
Post # 14
He barely helps, but I don’t mind. I can have things my way without having to “discuss.”
I feel like most men JUST DON’T CARE about flowers and invitations etc. etc. etc… and that’s ok. I’m not going to force him to pretend to care. The day is about us, but I fully realize most of these details are to please me and the other lady guests who notice them 🙂
I don’t think it’s any reflection of what kind of partner he is. If I were planning other frou-frou parties in the future I wouldn’t expect him to care about those either. But he’s very involved in other things we do so it evens out.
Post # 15
FH has done all the leg work for our caterer, DJ and says he’ll do the favors.
The food’s pretty important to him, and he’s paying for most of it.
The DJ’s a friend of his.
The favors were his idea and looked to be a total PITA, so I told him if he wanted them he could do them.
I would imagine if I asked for help on any one of the 54,232 crafting projects on my to do list he would begrudgingly help.
Post # 16
He left wedding planning to me and I left honeymoon planning to him!