Post # 1
I’m getting married in two months!! EEEEK! I am the big DIY bride and won’t have a day of coordinator and will be relying on myself, bridesmaids and other people offering to help….
We have a great family home that we are having the ceremony and reception at. There are plenty of things that we can set up the night before like tables and chairs… But for the morning of I have:
linens, centerpieces, table setting, ceremony decor(not much, but we do have a 1000 crane backdrop lol), the bar, signage, lighting ect
Any other you other budget/diy brides have a lot of set up the morning before? I’m just getting nervous that I’m going to be stuff at this venue for EVER and then get behind on getting myself ready and all that…
I guess I really just want to hear if I’m the only one in this boat. I’m getting so stressed and tired just thinking about it all. Overwhelmed.
Thanks Bees <3
Post # 3
We’re doing all the set up ourselves as well. The venue lets us in a few days before so we’ll have most of it done before the day itself. I’m getting the groomsmen and my very kind family to deal with the stuff on the day and planning on letting go nd doing nothing myslf.
Can you get into the venue in advance? If so could you do ll the table setups the day before?
Post # 4
My aunts (all 12 of them!) are going to be doing the set up at the venue the day of. I’m pretty easy going so if it’s not perfect I really don’t care. I’m just glad it’s going to be taken care of!
Post # 5
Yes, it’s a family friends home and we can get in there whenever really. I’ll have deliveries starting Thursday.
It’s just all the linens and little things that I am going to have to try and release control of and just let them know…Maybe I can just show up to direct everyone and then go home…Oye.
This just seems like one of those things that you won’t know until the day comes.
Post # 6
@linds12: I ended up doing very little that morning. We ended up assigning friends and family members to certain tasks so I could just get ready. Everyone (including me) still did more than they expected, but it wasn’t too bad. My cousin volunteered to be the point person for the day. I would recommend choosing one person to do that. Even though I gave out her number, people were calling me constantly while I was trying to get ready!! Imagine if I was the only contact! What I discovered is that people really want to help & they don’t want you to be working the day of your wedding. I was absolutely exhausted from all I did they day before too, but it was nice to just be able to relax! It’s the one day of your life when you can ask other people to do things for you and not feel like a bratt! So as much as you can just assign taks to people, do it! And don’t feel bad! They wouldn’t offer to help if they didn’t want to!
Post # 7
@Amayansong: Thank you so much, this is kind of what I needed to hear. I REALLY KNOW I have people that are willing to help it’s just going to be tough to give away that control…I’d rather just be upset with myself if it didn’t turn out right rather than be mad at someone who was just trying to help…(I’m sure that’s supposed to be the other way around haha)
Well I think what I’ll do is just take my control freak-ness and harness it into giving the people who WANT to help all the information they’d need to get things done. Details on how things should be set up and who to talk to with questions.
YAY More schedules and things to make (which I’m secretly loving)
Keep the advice coming! I love it!
Post # 8
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Try, try, try, try your hardest to have other people set up so you don’t have to do anything the morning of! Trust me, you will want to relax and getting ready/ photos take a lot longer than you think.
I’m sure you have your reasons but if there’s ANY WAY you can have a DOC, your day will move soooo much smoother.
Post # 9
@linds12: I totally know what you mean about wanting to make sure everything is the way you want it. I think when you go DIY, you put so much into it and know so many details, it’s hard to imagine anyone else doing it. If it helps at all, I was so stressed the couple of weeks leading to the wedding, I got to a point where I almost wished everyone else was just making the decisions! I had a co-worker who just told her family what colors she wanted & they planned everything!! I was so jealous! But in the long run, I’m so glad we went DIY and loved how personal everything was.
We did a few things like taking pictures of our mock table set up, the layout of the tables & chairs & where we wanted everything to go. I went over it with each person who was in charge of that section. For the most part, things went as planned, but there is so much involved, that there will always be something that isn’t perfect and at a certain point, you just have to let go. Maybe you can give people assignments and come out before you get your dress on to make sure things are the way you want it. I chose to wait until I entered to see everything and it was a really beautiful experience. It was pretty amazing to see my vision finished & put together with so much love by the people who are closest to me. I think if I had gone out & looked, I may have found some imperfections. Maybe I could have fixed them, maybe not, but I was so overwhelmed by everything else that I didn’t really have time to look! But if you really feel strongly about it, I suggest going ahead & looking first if youhave the time.
I do have to say though, that having my cousin as the day of planner was so helpful. Everyone was pulling me in all different directions during the wedding and I knew that things were in her capable hands & I could always refer people to her. The last thing I wanted was to have to deal with directing people, changing a garbage can, looking for something that was missing, etc. She was not a wedding planner but she is an event planner at a nice restaurant so I knew I could trust her. Maybe you have someone like that in your group? I realize this is a lot of info, but I hope it helps. Good luck with everything!!
Post # 10
@linds12: For our 100% DIY wedding, we rented the venue the day before our wedding in order to set up so that we didn’t have to rush or stress out on the morning of. We had our entire wedding party + SOs, parents, and a few out of town relatives helping with tables, linens (tablecloths/napkins and chair covers), the backdrop, centerpieces, decor, bar, etc. and it took approximately 4-6 hours to get everything as I wanted it.
I think the biggest thing is learning to delegate, and finally knowing when to take a deep breath and relinquish stress and control. (Even so, when everyone had left the venue and was heading to the rehearsal dinner I was the very last one in the building, fretting over wrinkles in the tablecloths and arranging jars and vases till they were just so, haha.)
Post # 11
@Amayansong: Thank you so much for the insight. Full of sound advice…I also just had a hight *LIGHTBULB* go off. (This may seem super obvi, but my brain is fried) SECTIONS!! DUH! I can have SO’s family in charge of ceremony, cousins in charge of Reception and then people can just float to whereever. DUH! Haha more lists to create (which, again, I love).
And I’m extremely thankful that my deliveries will be there either the Thursday or Friday before, and all we’ll have to do is the decor that can’t be left overnight.
I’m getting very excited!!!!!
<3 thank you guys!