How much to give?

posted 3 years ago in Money
  • poll: How much do you give as a wedding present?
    The same amount that was given you : (5 votes)
    6 %
    Try to cover your plate : (13 votes)
    15 %
    What you can afford : (63 votes)
    74 %
    Other- explain : (4 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I always give a minimum of $100. $200 if it’s both me and SO

    Post # 4
    Member
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee

    A combination of 2 and 3, plus ”how close to the couple” I actually am.

     

    Post # 5
    Member
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    $50 if one of us is going and $100 if both of us are!

    Post # 6
    Member
    2782 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I’ve never really understood the “cover your plate”- every place charges drastically different for  your plate.  We are doing upscale apps- heavy apps- enough that you will be more than full.  It’s at upscale venue though- so you might not realize it, but it’s about $100/person.  

    Post # 7
    Member
    965 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    It also depends on how close we are and if one of us is in the bridal party. When FI was a groomsman, the gift was less because we spent a lot of money on the tux rental, travel, and hotel.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1289 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    It depends on so many things for me. How close we are to the couple, family vs. not family, type of wedding (destination vs local), what we can afford at the time….etc. We don’t show up  empty handed but we don’t make it a point to RSVP if we only afford a min. of $100pp….

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @missfroggy:  are you saying in your post that you would NOT RSVP to a wedding if you couldn’t give more than 100 pp? 

    Post # 10
    Member
    1287 posts
    Bumble bee

    Depends.  

    Co-worker:  $25 because I’m cheap like that 

    Friends and distant family – $50 

    Close family – $100

    These are my rules, and I’m sticking to them…

    Post # 11
    Member
    2305 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Really it depends on what you can afford.

    I graduate in December with my undergrad, DH graduates in May, and then he’s got a couple of years of very expensive grad school coming up.

    Being young, it’s not like either of us is very established in a career right now, and $50 isn’t something we’d sneeze at.

    My cousin just got married recently and DH and I purchased her a set of $80 Pyrex containers that I knew she really really wanted- but I am REALLY close with my cousin.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1289 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    @BeeinBoston:  That is not what I am saying. Sorry if I wasn’t clear. That sounded jumbled. 

    I RSVP regardless of whether or not I am going. 

    I do not decline an invitation based off of whether or not I can afford a certain threshold to give. I always show up with something. Whether it be $50 or $100 or a registry item. I never come empty handed. 

    I don’t look at an invitation and say, “We can’t go because we don’t have $200.” 

    Post # 13
    Member
    2576 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    It depends. I once went to a DW, and it cost me a grand just to fly/stay there. I gave the couple $50 (one person) as more of a symbol. Since then, I’ve attended every wedding with DH, and we would give $200 from both of us.

    It’s more of a standard for us as opposed to covering our plate. For instance, DH’s cousin had a bbq on the beach (obviously it was less than $100 a person), but we still gave $200 for both of us. On the other hand, DH’s family friend had a more elaborate wedding with sit-down dinner and open bar all night, and we still gave $200. 

    When my best friends get married, I will give them more, but only if I can afford it.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1802 posts
    Buzzing bee

    We haven’t been to a lot of weddings since we’re still pretty young, and the few that we’ve been to we’ve given gifts off of the registry. I we have spent between $50-$100 on gifts, and would probably plan on giving about the same amount of we gave cash. I think once weddings start getting closer together in the next couple of years we will probably have to stick closer to $50 because it’ll become a major expense if we’re attending five or six weddings a year and giving $100 to each couple. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    10748 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    $100 each, or $200 as a couple. More if we are closer to them but I wouldn’t give less than that. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @missfroggy:  that makes sense. I’m exhausted today so I knew there was a chance I was misreading.

     

    i know when it comes down to my wedding I would rather have people come empty handed than to RSVP no because they couldn’t afford a certain amount for a gift. I just want them their to enjoy our special day with us! 

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