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I am buying my BM's jewelry as their gift. I bought a small makeup bag to put it all in that have bridesmaid wirtten in diamonds on them. (diamond's are out theame, natuarlly) My sisters has Maid Of Honor written on it instead.
My bridesmaids are paying for their own dresses (except for one girl), they are under $150 each. They an wear their hair how they like and I've requested they wear silver shoes of their choice. I would like to give them each a pashmina and a piece of jewelry they can wear to the wedding. I'm guessing it will run about $75-$100 each. Personally, I don't think you need to give them anything else - the hair/makeup and jewelry are more than enough!
I spent about $13 on each. You guys make me feel so cheap! hahah I'm giving a clutch bag to match the shoes (they were on clearance at David's Bridal for $5) and earrings (for $7.50). Other than that they are paying for everything else themself. I have never went to a wedding or been in a wedding where brides gave expensive guests. Usually its just the earrings and a small note or something. The girls are paying for their own hair and makeup. We have 3 girls: one is doing her own makeup and getting her hair done at the salon I'm getting mine done at, another is having her hair done by my friend who is a cosmetologist and is doing her own makeup, the last one is getting her hair and makeup done by the cosmetologist. My friend who is a cosmetologist told me that the girls can pay her "whatever they can afford", which is nice. So they are paying $150 for the dress and whatever they want to pay to get their stuff done. My FI's family doesn't give any gifts to their groomsmen and bridesmaids.
@ashleyyyg: To be honest, if I were a bridesmaid (and I've never been one), I would not even expect a gift at all. I understand that it costs money to be one, but I always felt that it was an honor to be asked - for me that's enough. Anything above that is a bonus for me. (disclaimer: unless you're insisting your BMs buy really expensive dresses or insisting on other specifics, imho)
A thank you gift (that is not part of their attire/accessories) is a nice gesture. Get something for them that you would get if it was for a birthday or Christmas that fits each girls' individual style and interests.
Generally though, they are responsible for their hair, makeup, shoes, jewelry, etc unless they caanot afford any of it themselves or you are demanding a certain look for everyone. It is very gracious of you to pay for everything for them.
I am planning on buying their jewelry and thinking about taking care of their hair and possibly makeup (hair and makeup probably will run around 45$ per girl, and since I only have two bridesmaids it wouldn't come up to that much...) I am unsure of getting anything else, I am very crafty so I might make them something special. I know its an honor to be asked, but being a bridemaid does cost $ and I want my girls to know that I appreshiate them!
I think paying for their hair and make up and jewelry is a good gift already.. I'm buying them jewelry and a small gift but that's because they're paying for own hair and make up..
Yes, because while it's nice you are paying for hair and jewlery, these aren't really gifts for them... they're kinda like gifts for yourself in disguise.
We paid for hair and make-up for the girls, they paid for dresses - and they had the freedom to wear whatever shoes, whatever accessories, whatever cardigans they wanted.
Gifts don't have to be super fancy expensive ones! I bought them a necklace/earring set {which they all elected to wear on the wedding day} and cute robes I got on sale from a lingerie store - they didn't break the budget, but it was my way of saying thanks!
Oh I have not thought about it, I have one bridesmaid my sister, we are doing our own makeup and I am doing my hair and her hair (I used to be a hairdresser).
She bought her dress it was on sale for $100, it was not the one I chose (or even the same colour, I wanted her to wear green but she chose purple) but she really loved it so I let her have it. But then a few months later she said I bullied her into buying that dress and she didnt like it and complained to my mum so I had to buy her a new dress, which I did. She did give me the old dress as it fits me, but it was not my choice.
Anyway she bought her own shoes, she is wearing earings and necklace I gave her when I travelled a few years ago (I am also not getting a new necklace or earings but wearing ones I already have).
Do I have to buy her a present aswell?
Also what about flower girls? I have two, their mum paid for their dresses even though I offered ($40 each). I bought them a headband to wear on the day, is that enough?
You don't HAVE to get them anything else. Personally however, I don't think buying them things to wear in YOUR wedding are really gifts for THEM. It is really just more stuff that you want in your wedding. I think that a bridesmaids gift should be personal to the bridesmaid and reflect her interests/style.
Do they have to have their hair and makeup done professionally? Perhaps you can save money by letting them do their own hair/makeup and and buying them a gift that is truely for THEM. Or, you could even make them something sweet and personal. At the very least I would write each bridesmaid a personal letter thanking them and explaining how much they mean to you.
Thanks ladies... the posts are very helpful! I think I might say they can also wear whatever jewellery they choose and that way I will have a few more $$ to buy them a little 'thank you' gift.
and sconzzy, I'm going to fill a little bag for our flowergirl and page boy as a little thank you / keep them busy gift. It will have some lollies, pretty things and things for them to play with at the wedding.
Maybe for your sis, you could pick out a piece of jewllery she would like.. but isn't going to wear on the wedding day (sounds like she wouldnt expect it?)
It's not necessary, but getting them a gift (aside from things wedding related) is a nice gesture to show them your appreciation. If you can tweak your budget to fit gifts in for them, I think it would be really nice. Paying for their hair/makeup is for your wedding, not necessarily for their benefit. The jewelry I could see being a great gift, especially if they could wear it again. I say maybe something personal in addition tailored to each bridesmaid!
Technically, the gift should have nothing to do with the wedding. IE, a spa day (to use at their convenience, not as wedding prep), tickets to something, whatever. If you're asking them to have their hair and makeup done, that's an above-and-beyond expenses, and you should cover it (BM's cover their dress and shoes).
That said, most of the weddings I've been in, the jewelry has been the gift. I don't really care, because I can't imagine getting a BM's gift I'd ever actually use again- I kinda chalk it up with the dress as "one-time-wear". I'd rather the bride pay for hair and makeup or mani/pedi's and call that the gift rather than jewelry.
My bridesmaids are spending about $120 on their dresses, wearing any shoes they want, any jewelry they want (I don't even want to give them a metal color, because most of the girls wear silver-tone, but my MOH wears a yellow gold necklace with her father's wedding band on it. He passed last year, and she was really close with him, as was I for that matter, and I don't want to ask her not to wear it). I'm toying with the idea of mani-pedi's the day of the rehearsal, but I'm not 100% sure about that yet.
I'm going to get each girl a gift I think she'd like and use (something different for each), and I'm budgeting $50 apiece.
Yes, you should get them something else. These things are part of your wedding, not gifts.
I'm in the camp where the hair/makeup/jewelry shouldn't count as a BM gift since you are paying for them to have it/wear it for your wedding. That being said, I wouldn't expect another gift on top of that personally, even if I paid for the dress, shoes, etc.
I did buy little coach wristlets for my BMs as a gift however since they were cute and inexpensive. I'm also paying for their hair, but I don't consider that part of their gift.
Depends on your budget. for me, the hair, makeup and jewelry should be enough. You can also add in a monogrammed tote with some wedding essentials into the bargain. :)
I got a super deal on monogrammed tote bags at http://www.etsy.com/shop/PersonalizedGiftsbyJ They were 9.00 each, it included monogramming.
I think what you're currently planning is plenty. As PPs said, being in the wedding is an honor, not a chore. Perhaps wrap the jewelry and gift it to them with a note of thanks at the rehearsal dinner?
For reference, my BMs are buying their own dresses ($250), picking their own shoes, doing their own hair/makeup (we're all ballerinas, we know how to throw an updo!). I am buying their jewelry - gifting it to them at the rehearsal dinner, each in a different jewelry box with their first initial engraved, along with a note of thanks.
@Stammie16: I completely agree. If you're the one requiring them to have their hair and makeup professionaly done and to wear jewelry of your choosing that is specifically for the wedding, that's not really a gift to them. You have to pay for that stuff if you say they must have it done, anything else would be rude. To me a gift is something that they can use after the wedding that was personally chosen for them.
I think hair, makeup, and jewelry is plenty. As for the posts that say it's not a present because it's for your day, that's not necessarily true as most jewelry can be reworn. My sister got us all necklaces and I love it and can wear it with everything, so that is a present not just something for the day of.
But I got my bridesmaids silver glitter flip flops ($3), earrings/necklace sets ($10, originally $35), and cardigans ($26). My Maid of Honor's parents are paying for makeup for my entire bridal party as a gift to me and my hair stylist is doing everyone's hair for free as my wedding gift. If those things were not being gifted to me, I would not be paying for them, I can't afford it. I think what I got them is enough. Their dresses were $125 and shoes of their choosing.
we didn't think to get any gifts for our bridesmaids/groomsmen because we bought everything they needed and only asked that they show up for the day of the wedding (we didn't slave them pre wedding)! We would have obviously loved to give each something else, but we paid for their hotel to stay the night before and night of the wedding, bought their outfits, shoes, paid for the alterations, hair and makeup (the groomsmen didn't get this obviously :p) and I personally made them their accessories (the boys got personalized cufflinks instead). I sure hope that's enough...because we spent a lot on just the bridal party alone. :p (four sets) I think once we get the photos from our photog, we canl frame a photo of each of them and give to them for keepsake..
I definitely wanted to get my ladies a gift. I got them all huge fluffy bathrobes with their name embroidered on it. Their dresses were $150 pre-alterations, and my mom paid each maid $100 toward their dress. We also paid for their makeup. They were allowed to do anything they wanted with their hair, jewelry, and shoes so that was on them. They did have to pay their own way to travel to our wedding location and stay in the hotel, etc.
I paid for hair & makeup for each of my girls. They each chose and paid for their own gown and shoes. I also bought each of them a Coach clutch, my intent wasn't for them to carry it on the day, although some did and some didn't. The clutch was chocolate brown, and I've seen each of them carry it since the wedding =) I wanted to make sure that I got them something that wasn't wedding related, so that they could re-use it.
I paid half the dress cost. Allowing them to pick own jewelry and shoes, I am buying them each a purse I plan to send a head of time as a little thanks. Then for wedding day I got them robes and treating to breakfast. They are paying own make up and hair, I let them all know they can to their own if they prefer. I think most bridesmaids say yes yo the honor knowing there will be costs. I think we as brides just need to be mindful of what we ask.
I am doing the following:
- $5.00 Tote Bag (this says Welcome and our names and wedding date)
- $15 worth of Savannah Bee Company lip balms and honey
- $12 padded fabric hanger for their dress
- A clutch (I make and sell them on Etsy so I know they're expecting one)
- Necklace to wear at the wedding (and hopefully again and again!)
- If I can afford it I am going to offer to pay for either hair or makeup and let them choose which
I'd like to say that I seem to be in the minority... I'd rather the bride pay for a beauty treatment (mani-pedi, hair for the wedding, yadda yadda) than a mish-mash of trinkets I very well might not use again. Then again, some of the gifts I see posted everyone says they'd use, and I wouldn't for a lot of it. I also have a lot of stuff I need to get rid of though.
My bride got me some pearl earrings and is paying for part of my dress. She knows what I needed!
I don't care how much someone spends in general. One of my favorite gifts to get is home-made jam from my aunt and, even MORE importantly, honey from the bees they keep! YUM-O! I appreciate that there's heart in it.
They bought their dresses ($120) and I am paying for alterations, hair and a mani/pedi before the wedding. I might also give them each a more personalized gift (like a framed photo) or something!
Honestly - the hair, makeup and jewlery isn't really a gift. It's all part of the wedding look, and will benefit you more than them. If it was up to them I'm sure they would do their own hair and makeup, and nix jewlery. So while it's generous of you to do these things, it isn't really a gift.
I think you owe your girls a "thank you" gift one way or the other. It could be something small, but it should be something that is meaningful to them. And not wedding related. A gift cert for mani/pedi, or to their fav restaurant. Or a pretty accesory.
I tend to lean to the opinion that if a BM can/should use XXX for your wedding.. that it is more like a gift to you lol.. so your wedding party can look pretty! I am gifting my girls CHI Hair straightners! (as well as other little things like nail polish, and any other cute things I find) But I am giving them a clutch to carry down the aisle.. the make-up that they get applied for the wedding and jewlery. Their dresses were only like 60$ and they are wearing shoes they already have but they are traveling a long way.
@jone0456: I really think that if you can swing it, a gift non wedding related is a kind thought. Hair/makeup and jewelry are for your benefit for the wedding, so it's always nice to think about the girls and what they might like outside of wedding stuff. IMHO!
I am gifting my girls (2) with their dresses ($240 each with tax) and their hair and make-up ($120) the day of. I will not be getting them jewelry or shoes or anything like that.
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I was just wondering how much everyone is spending on their bridesmaid?
My bridesmaids are paying for their own dresses ($350)
I have told them they can wear whatever shoes they choose.
I am paying for their hair and makeup ($160) and I want to buy their jewellery to wear on the wedding day too and presuming this will cost at least $50
... should I get them a present to say thankyou too?