Post # 1
I am meeting DH’s longtime childhood friend and his wife this weekend. We invited these people to our Destination Wedding but they couldn’t come. We’ve had 2 opportunities to meet up with them in the past but they blew us off.
So since EVERYONE always asks us how we met…blah blah, Darling Husband and I started talking about what to tell them. When Darling Husband moved overseas over 3 years ago, he was “dating” his LT gf. Didn’t want to be with her but she “refused” to let them break up. She thought they could make a LDR work. She even visited him while him and I were just friends. She never thought it was strange that NONE of his friends met her during her 3 week vacation.
Anyways, him and I started dating after she left…I moved in 6 months later. He called her to break it off (b/c she was still telling everyone they were together) but didn’t tell her it was b/c of me….thought her craziness would cause problems. BTW she still says she is with him and has pictures of them both on her myspace. Tells everyone who doesn’t know he’s now married that he’s coming back to her soon.
It took Darling Husband a while before he told his old friends he was with someone new. We got engaged over a year after I moved in but his friends think it was less than 6 months. During a phone convo with this friend the other night, he mentioned we hadn’t been together that long…mind you he married his wife after knowing her for 7 months.
Now, Darling Husband wants to stick to the “original” timeline he told his friends b/c if it got back to her (which I’m sure it will), she’d be contacting his family again….she’s tried but luckily, my ILs blow her off as a crazy person. I don’t see why we shouldn’t tell them exactly when we met.
Post # 3
I really don’t think you need to go that into detail. You’re not describing HOW you met, you’re describing your personal relationship circumstances around the time that you met.
So how’d you meet? In a bar? Through friends? Online?
Stay positive with your story. I’d personally be fine with whatever timeline he wanted to use so that it didn’t create drama in your lives. It really doesn’t matter at this point, and it helps him save face/prevent craziness. Don’t underestimate HIS need to save face – he was dating someone else while someone in another country thought they were still together and he wasn’t being firm with her, if I’m understanding correctly.
I’d just stick to HOW you met and not who you were/weren’t dating and their perception of it when you met.
Post # 4
Wow…this is one, big elaborate lie! How about if you guys just say that you started off as friends while he was overseas and you eventually realized your feelings for each other? Why do you have to give them a specific timeline of when everything occurred?
Post # 5
Also…does his ex know that you guys got married? B/c it’s a little weird that she still thinks that the two of them are together when he’s already married to you?
Post # 6
Yeah these details shouldn’t come up in normal conversation– who cares what month you met him? You’re married now and that’s what matters.
Post # 7
@texasbee: I agree with you, now that you’re married you can tell them the truth if you want to.
Post # 8
@Kurzweil: Apparently, him and the ex used to break up all the time. His friends got tired of her drama and tried to blow him off in the process. It’s taken a long time for him to get back those old friendships. And after his ex came to visit, she told him and apparently everyone else, she was going to move overseas to be with him. He kept telling her it was over but she thought moving to be with him would help. So imagine their surprise when he tells them I’m living with him!
@2PeasinaPod: That’s exactly how I describe it…who cares when? Last year, she friended him on FB. He showed it to me and was curious as to whether or not she had posted their pics on her FB. I told him to friend her and then he changed his status to engaged…since he hadn’t yet.
She deleted him or so we thought…just “deactivated” her account. She popped up on his friends list a couple of months ago so he deleted/blocked her. She gets on her myspace regularily (that’s what she uses) and she hasn’t changed a thing. Starting to think she has some mental issues.
Post # 9
I would just tell the truth. but maybe not every little details since it’s unnecessary.