(Closed) How much/what to communicate?

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sweet5k:  It sounds (to me) that if he brings stuff up on his own (like, comments related to your future wedding and engagement) it’d be pretty safe to mention things occaisionally, you know, if there’s a wedding on a TV show, or something. It doesn’t sound like he’d be too freaked out by what you described! 

Post # 4
Member
1404 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@sweet5k:  There’s no point skating around the topic. Just tell it to him straight. If he loves you he’ll understand and you can feel free to tell him how you feel. He can then respond and you can both come to an agreement, be it a timeline, whatever so that you no longer have these questions and uncertainty. He said he definitely wants to marry you one day, so talking about it shouldn’t be off limits.

Post # 5
Member
7318 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I think it’s often helpful to start with imagining your future together and discussing that. Talk about values, priorities, life goals, timelines, where/how you see your SO fitting into your plan, ask him questions to find out what he wants, when he wants it, and how you can be his teamate in achieveing his goals. When you start having these sorts of discussions, things come up organically and you both learn ever more about one another. Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

You can’t say the wrong thing to the right guy.  I asked my H to come to Thanksgiving at my mom’s house (4 hours away in another state) the first night we met.  Like a crazy person.  He said yes.  We were married 11 months after that August night.

Post # 7
Member
2567 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@oneofthesethings:  This totally…  Even a year and some months later, I might say something once in a while, feel silly about it, and when I say so to SO he looks at me and says “what? don’t feel silly, you’re fine…”  

If marriage is on your mind then by all means, bring it up – subtly, and not all the time, of course, but definitely put it out there. 🙂

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