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I worry about everything so when I hear something like this it def scares me. Just try and think of all the healthy babies you know and the odds are in your favor. "More than 99% of children born alive will not die from SIDS." http://www.sidsfamilies.com/index.php?sec=sidsinfo
I am so sorry about your friends. That is truly heartbreaking!
Not that it makes you feel any better because it's a horrible thing, but approximately 3,000 babies die a year from SIDS. When you consider the amount of babies born each year, it's not that many. Granted, one is too many.
You can get an AngelCare monitor. I don't have one, we can't afford it, but I know several people have talked about having one.
Just to shed some light on something most people don't realize, 12 times more babies are stillborn than die from SIDS, yet there is more research about SIDS than stillbirth.
PM me if you want to talk about it and preventative measures, I have some experience in this unfortunately but I don't talk about it on the boards.
Although maybe it will change when I'm pregnant or have an infant, SIDS isn't something I would worry a ton about. Yes - it is completely devasting when it happens but the chances of it affecting you and your child are so small in the grand scheme of everything that it isn't something that I would spend my energy stressing over.
I'm so sorry that it has hit close to home though and I definitely feel for your friends.
@KatyElle: Ditto.
OP, you can PM if you want to talk, but yes, I worry about it a lot.
Not having been affected by it, or know anyone personally who has, it's on my radar but not a huge point of worry for me right now (20 weeks). I'm planning to follow the main recommendations for preventing SIDS (the right sheets, no crib bumpers, etc.) but hope to not stress too much about it. And I'm also pretty wary of the various monitors out there. Some of the new video monitors pose even more of a risk if they have cords because the baby can reach up, get tangled and suffocate. So I guess I'm more of a "remove what might cause SIDS/strangulation" than a "find out what I can add to the nursery to prevent SIDS" kind of mom right now.
@Goldilocks1107: That's why I liked the Angel Care monitor. It's a censor pad that goes under the crib mattress to monitor breathing, movement and temperature. It isn't near or touching the baby.
I have never been overly worried about it. I have taken the precautions (back to sleep, no crib bumper, no blankets or pillow in the crib), but I haven't done anything serious. I know it is a terribly scary thing and devastating to the families. But in all honesty, I think I worry about having a major car accident with a fatality more than SIDS, and I still drive of course.
Thanks for talking with me, ladies. I am feeling a bit better about it, and just arming myself with lots of info. Hopefully the funeral won't absolutely terrify me.
I know it's rare and my chances are good that things will be fine, but I still think knowledge is a powerful thing and it's better to be prepared than to pretend it can't happen.
A baby dying of actual SIDS is very very rare. A lot of times it is suffication, and it is just lumped in with SIDS. They are two different things. For SIDS-SUDDEN infant death syndrom-there is no reason. Babies getting stuck against bumpers, or something like that is suffication.
I know how rare it is and I am still TERRIFIED. Liv is 5.5 months old and she JUST started sleeping on her belly, which Im only allowing because we have the AngelCare Monitor. That thing is seriously the only reason I sleep easy at night.
I am so sorry for your friends lose, SIDS terrifies me. I have a 3 week old and have become so anxious over SIDS. When I was preggo I didn't think about it or dwell on it at all. But a week after DS was born I started to really focus an freak about it. I am doing everything that it says but I am still a wreck over it and I make myself sick worryng about it.
Now my DS refuses to sleep on his back so it's making me even more of a wreck, I have had tons of sleepness nights holding him.
I do realize that it's rare but I feel like I ALWAYS see and hear stories of babies dying from SIDS. I got the Angel Care but haven't used it yet since DS won't sleep in his bassinet.
My dad's first baby passed from SIDS. He had my sister and I on a heart monitor when we were babies.
I think that once you come home with a new born its normal to worry about it. I try to just be positive and pray for the best, not much else I can do really.
I've feel like being a mom is one worry after another...
1 - Can I get pregnant 2 - What if I miscarry 3 - What if the baby has birth defects/etc 4 - What if it's a still birth/cord around the neck 5 - SIDS 6 - falling down the stairs 7 - Cancer 8 - Right now I'm so afaid of a car accident 9 - Next he's going to be playing contact sports... I'm 33 and I'm sure my mom STILL worries about me!
They are real worries. We take the precautions and we can and try not to let the worries consume us :) When you have real life stories close to you these worries hit home even more. You hug your babies real tight and say prayers to the God you believe in to keep your family safe.
Seriously... we only want 2 kids... but I'm scared to death to let my hubby get fixed after #2 because I've had so many friends lose pre-schoolers to childhood cancer if that happened to us I think I'd want to try for another. Then I think about it and it's just kinda silly to think like that. But I do.
By heart breaks for your friend. I just can't imagine.
I try not to worry at all.
Life's too short to spend it worrying and fretting all the time--I don't want to go gray early.
I am just going to trust that everything is in God's hands and do my best to provide a very safe and loving home for our DD.
@bree72: A similar thing happened to my sister a few years ago. Her 7 month old son, who was incredibly gorgeous and healthy went to sleep one night, never to wake up again. Losing my nephew was devastating for me, and that doesn't even begin to describe what it was like for my sister and my brother-in-law.
Before that happened to her, it wouldn't have been a blip on my radar. Now that I've seen it and what it does to families, it will always terrify me.
Is there anything anyone can do to prevent actual SIDS (not suffocating or otherwise dying from some outside cause)? If not, I just can't see myself worrying about it since there is absolutely nothing I can do.
@KellyV: I was more scared of things like getting tangled in the spokes of the crib and breaking a leg, or smushing against the bumper. Either way, it is a terrible feeling. I didn't mean to say that your fears weren't valid. it is all terrfying. When DD started rolling over I was awake every 5 seconds. Now she sleeps soundly on her stomach, she puts herself there, and I just have to tell myself every day that I'm doing the best I can without letting fear take over my life.
I just gave her those little puffs cereal thingys because everyone has been telling me I'b being a baby about solid foods and those are recommended for 9 months old. While she was eating them I felt like I was going to faint. My ears were hot, I was sweating, I felt dizzy. You only have more to look forward to!
@KellyV: Baby Smushface hates sleeping on his stomach (usually wakess up and cries till I put his paci back in his mouth) but on New Years Eve when I got home at 1:30 (my in-laws were babysitting) he was sound asleep on his stomach. I kept checking on him but I couldn't sleep until I flipped him over.
I just followed all the precautions but I suppose in a true SIDS case there would be nothing I could actually do. It just makes me thankful for all the times he wakes me up in the middle of the night.
@highwire: No, there's nothing oney can do to prevent SIDS, because it is unknown as to what causes it. SIDS is a process in which the baby's body essentially goes into shock (or something similar) and shuts down on its own for no readily explainable reason. Once SIDS strikes, it cannot be stopped, even if it all happens at a hospital with the best medical facilities available.
There are some things that correlate to higher occurrances of it. For example, it is seen most often in babies who have mothers that smoke, male babies, and African American babies. However, nobody has been able to pinpoint one thing as a cause. So...no, there really is nothing you can do about it, besides staying away from known risk factors like smoking.
That doesn't mean that you can strike the worry or fear of it happening from your mind though, just as we worry about dozens of other things we can't control. Once you lose a baby like that or even if you watch it happen to a loved one, I think it is possibly even harder to think of it as some benign thing of chance, even if you really can't do anything about it.
Oh my gosh. That is devastating. I'm sorry for your friends and for you as well.
I was so afraid of SIDS when my son was born...I would wake myself up every thirty minutes or so to put my hand on his chest to check if he was breathing, for the first 5 months. I was more exhausted from that than from his sleep schedule.
@lamingred - I didnt think you said that my fears werent valid so no worries =o) I gave Liv a Mum Mum the other day while I was holding her and she started gagging. I got hot and sweaty and FREAKED out and hid them so the nanny wouldnt be able to give her any lol! We start solids in 2 weeks. Im going to be a damn wreck
@Camrie - she would NOT be on her belly without the AngelCare because I wouldnt be able to take it. She slept straight from 7pm-6am today and I probably woke up 3-4 times during the night to check the video monitor. I even convinced myself that the fan in her room was making the angelcare keep going lol. Our video monitor has a talkback feature (where I can talk through it into the nursery) so Id push the talk button and rub my finger on the microphone to make a little noise to jostle her lol. Im hoping this anxiety diminishes a LITTLE lol
@bree72: Iam so sorry for your friend's loss. It is truly a terrible thing. We got the Angelcare monitor. It has some false alarms, but overall, it gives me a lot of peace of mind...especially because DD is a belly-sleeper who insists on smushing her face into the mattress. Now matter how much I used to flip her, she'd roll right back into that position...so I finally flipped on the monitor, said a prayer and went with it...but it's still scary.
@KellyV and @flamingred: You guys sound exactly like me with the solid foods. DD is 8.5 months and DH has been pushing for finger foods. So I reluctantly gave DD a piece of banana (cut into the tiniest, most miniscule, practically microscopic pieces ever)...and she still gagged. I was like, "OK, we're done!" Now I know I need to try again, so I got those meltaway puffs...but honestly, I get sweaty just thinking about it. I keep coming up with excuses to put it off when DH asks about it. Poor child would probably be eating pureed foods until she's 5 if I had my way about it. haha.
I'm terrified of SIDs. My mom had a sister die of SIDs, so it's always on my mind. I know there's nothing I can do, but I can't help it.
@goodbuddy - feel ya there. To make you a BIT more relaxed, babies will almost always gag with the first few things you put in their mouth. If the tongue thrust reflex is gone and they arent pushing it out of their mouth, they instinctively move it to the back then suddenly go "WOAH!" and dont immediately put together the swallow portion of it. Mush the banana up into a paste or add some milk/formula to it to water it down a bit and try it again. I was going to try BLW as a method of feeding, but I truthfully think Liv NEEDS teh purees first. Or maybe Ill wait a bit longer and let her get to BLW on her own
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I am currently 24 weeks along with my first, and really haven't been letting myself stress over the future too much. Just planning and researching and praying for a smooth delivery and healthy baby.
On New Years Eve, though, we had friends lose their 3 month old baby overnight to SIDS. It was their 3rd child, he was completely healthy, but just did not wake up. His funeral is tomorrow and they are, understandably, devestated.
I've always heard about SIDS, have skimmed over the chapters in my baby books, but because I have never known anyone who has lost a child to it, I just didn't think about it too much. Now I cannot stop thinking about it. I am so heartbroken for them and have cried multiple times this week just thinking about how quickly he was gone. It has spurred this new fear in me and I cannot stop researching breathing monitors and crib mattresses and pretty much anything that might attribute to keeping my baby alive. I'm trying not to dwell on it, but it's pretty difficult.
So, is anyone else super worried about SIDS? Hopefully this fear will subside a little before our baby makes his appearance.