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Lately I have been questioning what people will think of BF and I getting engaged soon...we are both 22 and know that we want to marry each other so that's not a question. I don't know if it's because I'm the oldest child & grandchild but my family seems unprepared for me to be engaged. I mentioned something to them last week about one of my friends being married already and their response was "I didn't realize she was that much older than you?" She's only 23! Albeit I am still in school and won't graduate for a couple of years but I'm working full time and have a license in what I do so it's not like I'm a part time student and worker...I work 7:30-4:30 M-F and go to school M-Th 5-9...both full time!
So just to ease my mind or maybe not, how old were you....
Started dating, engaged, and then married???
I don't think we're crazy for wanting to be married next year but maybe I'm wrong...
Oh and to top off my anxiety my mom is going to be meeting his parents and grandparents for the first time tonight! Awesome!
Not crazy - if you know it's right, you know.
We met at 16, dated ever since and got engaged at 23. When we get married, we'll both be 24. At least in our area of the country, we're actually slow to get married since we didn't do so right after college.
You're young! Although when I was 18 my grandparents told me that they won't give me birthday presents anymore, but they will give me anniversary presents. Talk about weird pressure!
I was 25 when we met, 28 when we married. I was a month shy of 27 when we got engaged.
The timeline is different for everyone. If you meet the right person young, all the better.
We started Dating when I was 17. We dated 5 1/2 years before we were engaged (this past August) I'm now 23. We will be getting married in Spring of 2011. I will be 24. I think it all depends on you and where you are in life. I will be done with school next month. We both have good full time jobs & have just purchased our first home. We will be beyond ready come May 2011!!
I'm 23 now, and we'll be engaged in February, married in August when I'll be 24 (my birthday is May 2). When its right, it's right, and as long as you go into it with both eyes open and realize that it's GOING to be hard, you'll be fine.
I feel like so many people who get engaged/ married young (including myself) expect it to be SO EASY because their relationship doesn't have the problems that everyone else's does and that they're different. Life has a funny way of handing you problems you don't expect and they always seem to affect relationships the worst.
We met at 22 (We're the same age)
Started dating at 23 or 24
Engaged at 27
Married 28
Well we started dating when we were juniors in college and now I am 27 and he is 26. We have been together for 4.5 years and we only moved in together 9 months ago. Mind you we are not engaged yet.
Every relationship is different. i know people that got married when they were 23 and I know people that are 30 and not engaged.
If you guys feel that this it then who cares what anyone else thinks. If you want to get married now and that's what makes you happy then go for it because in the end you have to live your own life for yourself not for anyone else.
Your family will come around once they see that you are happy.
When it's right, you just know. There's no other way to explain it than that.
My fiance and I had only dated for 5 months when we got engaged. We'll have been engaged for a year and a half by the time the wedding rolls around. And when we get married, I'll be 27 and my fiance will be 30. I guess we're not exactly considered young, though we're certainly not old.
Even if your parents seem resistant at first, they'll come around once they realize how happy you are and that you really are a responsible adult.
We started dating when I was 20 (he's 2 years older).
Engaged when I was 23.
And I'll be 25 when we get married in July.
Me Him
Met 18 21
Engaged 22 25
Married 23 26
My parents are still getting used to me being married. It takes time because i'm the oldest daughter and also, now the only child. So just move on with your life, what you want to do, and they'll get used to it. They may "never" be ready
We started dating when I was 23 and he was 25. We were engaged after I turned 24 and he turned 26, and we will be those ages when we get married on January 2nd!
I echo what the others have said: it all depends on the people and where they are in life. We specifically are waiting until he finishes school to marry, but we didn't wait til then to get angaged.
I read a statistic recently that 25 is the median age most women marry for the first time. That number has been rising steadily, but it's not all that far off from where you are. Do you still live at home? I know my parents had a hard time coming to grips with my adulthood until I was living on my own and financially independent. Even then, if you are the eldest child that's going to be a big adjustment to them. Is this your first serious relartionship?
Started Dating / together since : me = 16 him= 17
Got engaged : me = 26 him= 26
Wedding Day : me= 28 him = 29
Started dating: Me 20, Him 22
Engaged: Me, 24, Him 26
Getting married: Me, 27, Him 28
Started dating: me=23 him=25
Got engaged: me=24 him=25
Wedding day: me=25 him=26
We met when I was 10 and him 12, started officially dating when I was 18 and him 19, and got engaged when I turned 22 and him 23. He is 24 now, and will be when we get married, and I will be 23.
Thank you all for your advice and kind words.
@missrain- I live with my grandparents because of their age they needed some help. I could afford a house and have looked at several but every time I mention moving out they pitifully ask if they have done something wrong....how do you respond to that? This will be my second serious relationship, the first one they thought I was going to marry but we just weren't meant to be. My family loves BF and knows that I'm going to marry him; I think it's just hard for them to realize that I'm grown.
We met when I was 23. Got engaged just before 24. Got married at 25.
You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders. Goals , job, etc. And if you get engaged at 23, you probably won't get married until what, 24? That doesn't seem too young to me. But I don't know you or your family or bf. And they know you pretty well. Have you talked to them to see if there is some other reason behind this, they feel you aren't ready to marry. Parents are a hard read sometimes. (Although I'm not sure this is coming from your parents.) But generally parents want what's best for their children. So it's a good idea to consider what they have to say. Unless you ahve rotten parents, you probably won't find anyone else who is much on your side as your parents. ON the other hand, sometimes they can lose perspective, and not realize (in protectng and making sure their kids have a good life) that you've grow and can actually make good choices for yourself.
It's a blancing act. Have an open convo with them. And tell them the ways in which you area prepared for marriage. I know you're 23. Maybe you feel like you shouln't have to explain things. But I think it will look like the mature thing to do.
Yep, sounds like a case of "but you're our little girl" syndrome! Good lukc, pec1216... when the time is right, they will come around!
we met when i was 25. we got engaged when i was 26, and i'll be 26 when we get married (a week away from 27). he was 29 when we met, and he'll be 31 when we're married.
started dating when i was 25 and he had just turned 27. not engaged - yet - but assuming he proposes before my 30th, i'll be 29 and he 31. our actual wedding will be determined by our finances so i'm guessing we aren't actually going to have a wedding until 2011 which make me 31 and him 32 (if we do it before Nov 2011).
When we met: 23 me - 25 him
Engaged: 27 me - 28 him
Married: 27 me - 29 him
We have been together a total of 4 years this past October 29.
My sister was...eighteen, I think? When she started dating my BIL. They married when she was 20 and he was 22. Happily married five years later and expecting their first child.
My man and I started dating when I was 20, he was 28. It looks like we'll be engaged at 21/29 and married just a hair over our 22nd and 30th birthdays. In our situation, I'll be able to get married right after graduation and it won't interfere with a job/career, and my parents will be able to send my younger sister to college b/c my student loans won't be tied to them anymore.
Age =/= maturity. It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders; I'm sure you'll be able to handle any of the challenges you face! :)
We met when I was 24, got engaged at 25, and married at 27. The most important part of that process thought wasn't considering what age we were when each event was happening, but focusing on the fact that it felt completely natural and right.
Maybe it's just because you're their first child to get engaged and married - my older brother got engaged a month before we did - and my parents were a little "One of our kids is old enough to get married?" in response. Lucky for me, by the time we got engaged, they were used to the idea of becoming in-laws and there wasn't any awkwardness, although I'm sure there would have been otherwise, even though I was 25! lol..
We are the same age (well, I'm 5 weeks older and he never lets me forget it!)
Started Dating - 21 (Had just turned 21)
Bought a house - 22 (Almost 23) - I think this delayed the engagement a bit financially, that's why I listed it
Engaged - 25
Married - 26
As far as I'm concerned, as long as you are over 18, age doesn't matter. It ALL depends on the people involved.
Ha, I love the charts! This post made me smile. Glad to see so many girls being supportive of eachother!
I'm 23, FI is 21. we started dating at 15 & 17. young marriage is beautiful:)
I was 21, he was 20 when we started dating. When we got engaged, I was 23, he was 21. And when we get married, I will be 23 and he will be 22. So I think if you are ready to make the next move, then go for it. Def not crazy.
Started dating: Me 23, Him 24
Engaged: Me 27, Him 28
Getting married: Me 29 (well, two weeks before my 29th birthday), Him 30
Every relationship is different-- I was 30 when we met, 31 when we got engaged, and 32 when we got married. However, if I had met him when I was 22 or 23, we still would've gotten married. I think it just takes meeting the right person.
Don't let others get you down! Just think how young a lot of our grandparents were when they got married-- and they seemed to make it through perfectly fine!
You know, age is so subjective. I have friends who are in their mid 30s who are so immature and who I'd quickly say are not ready to get married, and at the same time, one of my good friends got married at 20, is incredibly mature (as is his wife, 6 months younger than him), and I can't imagine them not being together anymore. Conversely, I know some 30-somethings who act like they're in the 50s, and some 20-somethings who act like they're in high school. Or maybe it's really all the same thing. :)
Actions and attitudes speak much louder than numbers or years, IMO. At least once you're a legal adult ;)
Me Him
Met: 18 24
Dating: 19 25
Engaged 24 31
Getting married in 29 days!!
It has been a rough road, my parents gave us a hard time at first but we have been living together for a few years and everyone gets along etc.
I think early/mid twenties the perfect time to get engaged! Alot of my friends around my age are engaged now (22-25yr olds) or have already wed.
We met at 18 and started dating at 20. We're 24 now and not engaged. Not formally, I guess.
I have friends who are younger than me and have been engaged for at least a year, and I've had a few friends who got (or are getting) married at 22/23, right out of college. I also met a guy who was getting married before he graduated, because his FI was going to grad school and they wanted to stay together.
Everyone is different but remember that your family knows you best and has your best interest at heart!
We met at 21
Engaged at 26
Married at 27
Met: 18
Engaged: 27 (him), 26 (me)
Married: 27
(We're only 3 months apart in age.)
I feel that when you know, then you know. If you have all the resources that you need to start your life together, and if that's what you want, then no one else should be able to judge you for that.
I think its completely different for everyone! I was experiencing the other side, where eveyone couldn't understand why we weren't engaged yet :)
Met: Both 20
Engaged: Both 24 (basicaly 25 b/c our B-days are right after)
Married: Both 25 (basically 26 b/c our B-days are right after)
We met at: me-16 him-17
Started dating me-17 him-18
Engaged: me-21 him 22
When we get married: me-23 him 24
Well since we have been together since we were so young and have been together for 5 years and will be together almost 6 on our wedding day... I feel like we are at a perfect age.
engaged at 22!! 23 now, getting married right after i turn 24.
Met at 19, dated 7 long years, engaged at 26, married at 28, celebrating our first anniversary at 29. Hated the delay at the time but now I think it was the right thing to do to wait until we are both mature enough to handle marriage.
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