Post # 1
We’re having a large dessert bar at our reception, with the intention of keeping the desserts homemade for a personal touch. I’ll be making a few things, as will my FMIL and BMs.
I want to ask our guests if they would like to contribute by bringing a dessert. They certainly do not have to, but I think this would be a great way to let those who wouldn’t otherwise be involved in the wedding lend a hand on our special day.
I would like to be able to put a little sign next to each dessert with the chef’s name, e.g. “Aunt Jan’s Strawberry Pie”, etc.
I was thinking I could ask guests at the shower. Or maybe put a little insert in the invitations and have them write what they’ll be bringing on the RSVP.
Any ideas how I could make this fun and personal without making our wedding seem like a potluck?
Post # 3
You’re hosting the party. You’re supposed to provide everything instead of asking the guests to bring any kind of food.
Post # 4
I think I would just do word of mouth. Maybe have both moms and BM’s, sisters etc spread the word. if you feel comfortable you can ask family but I would not put any thing in writing.
Post # 5
I think it will seem like a potluck no matter how you phrase it. How many people are you expecting at your wedding?
Post # 6
@MichiganGirl24: If you are having multiple guests bring food items it IS a potluck. A dessert potluck.
I’m not sure the proper way to ask, or if there even is one. I wouldn’t mind too much being asked to bring something however when I am invited to a wedding I don’t typically expect to be asked to provide the food items. I guess it would really depend on the location of the wedding and time it takes to get there as to how open I would be to helping out.
Post # 7
@cmbr: around 80
Everyone who will be attending are close friends and family.
I was thinking of asking only the ladies who will be at the shower as they are closest to me and would like to help out.
Maybe I could ask them for recipes instead?
Post # 8
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
Oh Lordy, I don’t think the bees will like this….
We did something similar for our welcome BBQ (to which we invited the whole guest list in lieu of a select few for a rehearsal dinner). I sent out an email to our in-town friends asking that, ONLY IF convenient and they feel like it, they bring a dessert to the BBQ. Or just show up, if not convenient! I’d say maybe 2/3 brought something and as far as I know, it went over just fine. We’re not very “etiquette-y” people though, very laid back.
In your case, since its the actual wedding and there’s also a sentimental aspect to it, I’d ask in person and word of mouth. But please emphasize that they only should if convenient and that you understand that out of town guests who have to fly or drive more than a few hours would probably not be able to cook a dish.
Post # 9
@strawbabies: We are having a very less than formal, non-traditional wedding and have had multiple offers from multiple guests about lending a hand as we are having a semi-DIY wedding.
I think my closest female friends and family would be happy to bring a dessert.
Post # 10
I think it’s a cute idea! I assume you’re providing everything else, like dinner/drinks/etc, right? then I don’t see anything wrong with asking a few special ladies (or men) in your life if they want to make their famous dessert for your dessert buffet. I’d have the host of the bridal shower mention it, maybe have a card that guests can fill out indicating weather they would like to participate, and indicating what they’d like to make, i.e “aunt sue’s famous strawberry pie” or “grandma June’s kentucky derby pie”.
I would just go with whatever they want to bring is awesome, rather then asking people to bring certain things. And if you end up with 5 plates of chocolate cookies, then so be it.
Post # 11
I think recipes is a great idea. My sister included recipe cards with my bridal shower invitations and asked everyone to write their favorite recipe for me to keep in a book. You could do something similar and include a note saying that you’d like to incorporate dessert recipes from those closest to you at the wedding. Alternatively, you could have recipe cards at the shower for people to fill out.
Post # 12
Most of our guests are local, so there shouldn’t be an issue there. And I would only ask those who are local.
Did anyone seem irked that you asked them to bring something?
Post # 13
@MichiganGirl24: Why not provide the deserts yourself?
Do you have a costco or Sams club nearby? We got our deserts in bulk for pretty cheap and everything tasted perfect!
It is going to be a potluck no matter how you phase it….I would just choose a few people (like favorite aunt, grandparent, parent, ect.) to make a desert as a favor.
Post # 14
@FortiesFlare: Yep, we’ll be providing everything else!
Good idea about having the bridal shower host mention it!
Post # 15
@MichiganGirl24: I think giving those people you would want to bring something a personal phone call. I would be honored if asked to do so and would love to show off a particular goodie I make. The whole idea sounds wonderfully delightful and personal.
Post # 16
@MichiganGirl24: Asking a lot of people to bring something to share to a party is pretty much the definition of a potluck- so I don’t think there’s a way around it feeling that way, unfortunately. I would ask a few people in person, not put it in the invite. Your shower is probably a good place to do so.