How to avoid "pregnancy" questions over the Holidays…

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

mrsalexander:  Any chance that there’s a cocktail bar around? My N/A beverage when out is cranberry and tonic with a wedge of lime. Looks like a cocktail, tastes great and people see you with a drink in your hand.

Post # 3
Member
457 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Just thinking of other people I have seen turn down a drink…. reasons including drank too much recently and need to take it easy, not feeling well, on a diet, need to get up early in the morning….. hope you find something that works for u!

Post # 4
Member
41855 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

mrsalexander:  You can’t avoid the questions. You can be prepared with an answer.

Tell them you are on antibiotics and can’t have alcohol. Commiserate with the boss’s wife about the timing given that the company is paying for the wine.

Post # 5
Member
3635 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Drug interaction, not feeling well, have to drive, quit for my health/fitness, there are lots of reasons.  I don’t always drink because I get migraines, so my family and friends were used to “no thanks, have a little headache today, don’t need to spend all weekend with a migraine.”  

Now I’m not drinking at all, and I’ll be 16wks by Christmas so that’s probably when I’ll tell at work.  Family will all know Thanksgiving.  I’m bringing the sparkling cider.  🙂

Post # 6
Member
653 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

It’s seriously amazing how rude people can be with the “why aren’t you drinking?” question…honestly I haven’t drank in years due to being on an anti-depressant that I wasn’t supposed to drink on and it was always amazing to me how pushy people could be asking me why I wasn’t drinking. For the people I didn’t care to share the reason with, I always just said “I’m not really in the mood tonight to drink” or “I’m the DD and I’m letting my husband have all the fun drinking tonight.” The “I’m on antibiotics” line is always a great one too as julies1949 suggested. Good luck and fingers crossed you are preg!!

Post # 7
Member
1847 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Will your SO be at the party with you? I found that the best thing to do to attract the least amount of attention/questions was to get a drink/beer/wine and hold it/have it at the table in front of me, and then make sure that DH had the same drink, and then he would just randomly pick up either one and drink from it, and I would take fake sips here and there… Then my drink level was going down and it looked like I had one, so a conversation didn’t even need to happen. Then after you get done with one, you can just say that it didn’t sit well with you or that you have an upset stomach and want to switch to water…..

Post # 8
Member
1526 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

mrsalexander:  i was just in a wedding at 10 weeks pregnant and I havent told any of my friends that I am pregnant yet.  I am not a huge drinker, but I am definately a social drinker.  During cocktail hour and the reception I ordered red wine and fake sipped on it. My DH also had red wine so he would switch glasses with me so it looked like I drank.  Then I ordered seltzer with lime at the bar and everyone thought it was vodka soda.

Post # 9
Member
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

mrsalexander:  I’m in a similar predicament and I feel for you! I love wine and my close family and friends all know it. We are TTC and going home for Thanksgiving and dreading on the questions. My plan is to basically accept but not drink a glass of wine. I don’t think anyone will notice how much I’m not drinking but it would be a topic of conversation if I don’t have anything. My parents can’t wait for grand kids so don’t need much encouragement to ask!! Good luck 🙂

Post # 10
Member
4383 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

They may speculate that you are pregnant, but hopefully good manners will prevent them from saying anything. (I went out with coworkers about a month ago, did not drink, and when I announced my pregnancy, a few of them said, “We had a hunch you were because you didn’t drink when we went out that time!”)

If they DO ask if you’re pregnant (again, that anyone would be presumptuous enough to do this blows my mind, but I know they’re out there!) I would just say, “Oh, I don’t think so; I’m on antibiotics.” If they have the gall to press further and ask what you’re on antibiotics for, make sure you tell them something that will really make them feel bad for pressing you, like that you have a UTI. 🙂 

Post # 11
Member
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

mrsalexander:  I’m in the same boat as you – I’m known for my love of wine, and almost always have a glass at after-work socials.  I’ve been trying to “prepare” by switching it up when we go out now with  soda water, or vodka-sodas, or the occassional beer so that when I do get pregnant, I can order a soda water, or a non-alcoholic beer, and hopefully no one will think it’s out of the ordinary.

Post # 12
Member
1446 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Also thinking about this!  I am going to have to do some good lying in the next few weeks… only 5w tomorrow!  Last night I was hiding it at my own house so drank some non-alcoholic wine, but that stuff is disgusting.  These are great ideas, ladies!  I am a big wine drinker so all of my close friends know how weird it is for me to turn down a glass of malbec.

Post # 13
Member
3402 posts
Sugar bee

mrsalexander:  I’m not pregnant anymore, but when I was pregnant and nearing the second trimester, but my SIL and BIL asked me on why I didn’t drink anything last year for fourth of july when they knew I drank a good bit with my husband.  I told them I was trying to not drink as much because of the weight I had gained.  (pregnancy weight) And they took it as such and didn’t question me again because they thought I just thought I had gotten fat.  It wasn’t until nearly two months later that I revealed I was pregnant.

Post # 14
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

mrsalexander:  Find an antibiotic that’s not effective when taken with alcohol- and say you’re on that.  It’s an easy way to quiet people up- as most people will not be so nosy as to ask further questions.

  • This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  .
Post # 15
Member
802 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015 - Backyard Forest

E_Lynne615:  This was going to be my exact suggestion. Just make sure you don’t actually drink it by accident!

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