Post # 1
I could really use some tips because a few people are about to board the hurt feelings train and I am not nice enough to tactfully tell them to get over it.
Please help me be more polite. D:
Just to clarify, I do want to keep this as small a wedding as possible, but to compensate we’re throwing an after party at our house to celebrate with everyone who couldn’t come to our wedding/reception since it will be mostly family at the wedding itself but we still want to party with our friends. These people I don’t want to invite know about the after party and they are just flat out not welcome to come. I want to tell them why they aren’t invited (they aren’t invited because I don’t like them), but FI won’t let me say that because he has to work with/around them and I don’t want to cause problems for him.
Post # 2
MrsRoberts52: This is when the social version of the little white lie comes into play.
” I’m sorry, we are not able to include everyone we would like to invite.” repeat, repeat, repeat
Don’t give a reason- budget, room size etc. That just leaves the door open for them to solve that problem.
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2015 - On a Cliff Overlooking the Bay, Florida
MrsRoberts52: My STD’s went out and i got bombarded with questions mform co-workers because a few co-workers i’m actualyl frinds with outside of work got invited. I just told them with the limited space the venue has (175 seated) and the large about of family 100 people nall toghther with 75 of them flying in form out of town we had to limit the amount of non family members we could invite. when I put it that way they understand.
Post # 4
Say as little as possible. Hopefully you won’t have to say anything at all. If they have any dignity they wouldn’t dream of bringing it up with you.
Post # 5
julies1949: yes amazing tip ! We are having a small wedding… As FI and I are paying fully for the wedding. I always wanted a small wedding… So when I got hit up by my partners parents about why so and so and so and so all there friends were not invited I said that we needed to keep the guest list small as it was what we could afford…. Well that opened a can of worms as they sarted asking price per head and suggesting they would pay for just their friends to attend… (Pay for nothing else which is fine but paying to invite all their friends who I don’t want there ! As I want an intimate wedding with very close ppl) well it bacame so awkward and I kept saying sorry we can’t accommodate them and they kept saying what’s the problem we will pay for them all …. Well I wish I just said what a pp said which is I am sorry we cannot accommodate everyone we wanted to invite. …. Way simpler….that way u are not opening up the can of worms I have
Post # 6
Stick to your guns!
If they mention it, then I would say “We’re actually doing something low-key and small with family”….if they keep on, just look at them in silence. Miss. Manners has taught me that’s very powerful.
Post # 7
I’m perfecting ‘We wanted very small and intimate weddings so it’s just our huge families and very few close friends”.