(Closed) How to Change a Best Man

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
41 posts
  • Wedding: September 2012

This is basically just normal family drama. When you tell family stuff like that it never stays secret. Just give it time to cool down.

Post # 4
36 posts
  • Wedding: May 2013

Family is family. We were brought up to put family first no matter what.  I have 3 brothers and they have made me so mad at times and at times haven’t spoken to them for a while (simply due to schedules and such).  But, no matter what they are my brothers.  I have different relationships with their wives (ranging from really great to i have to bite my tongue when I’m with them).  Because I wanted 2 of the wives in my bridal party I had to ask the third.  I know my brother would have been hurt by me not iincluding her so I did.  Honestly, I’d rather keep him happy/not hurt our relationship and deal with the wife for a bit.  

Would replacing him make things worse?  My momalways had strong opinions about my brothers’ SO and as much as she wouldn’t verbalize anything and be polite, we all knew what she thought.   So, even if your Fiance confirmed his supposition, he obviously knew already.  His parents really shouldn’t be upset. And the breaking his trust aspect of it..it’s what families do.  My mom always tells me things that my brothers don’t want me knowing (or tell me separately on their own)anD my brother even told my Fiance something and asked him not to tel me because he thought I’d tell my mom.  


So, unless his brother marries this girl, sounds like she won’t be around for long.  

Post # 5
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I don’t think demoting the brother is the right answer. Like the PP said, this is pretty standard break-up drama within a family. The brother put your Fiance in an awkward situation, but it’s not worth throwing away the realtionship over. I think if he kicks his brother out of the wedding party he will regret it. 

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