Post # 1
So I know I want a moissanite as my e-ring. I love space! and I don’t like the idea of walking around with thousands of dollars worth of something on my hand.
So I managed to convince my SO….mainly by being extremely exicted and happy when telling him about it. We’ve even nicknamed it my space rock.
But we’ve hit a snag….my SO always wanted to pick out my e-ring with is younger sister. So he mentioned the space rock to her, who mentioned it to his mom….and they hate the idea. His sister feels like diamond or nothing and his mom feels “she deserves something great for putting up with you for so long” (background: this sept. will be 9 years for us…and he’s been unemployed, well working part time, for the past 3 years).
Now my SO doesn’t want to get a moissainite because he doesn’t want his family (or more accurately, my family) to feel that he is cheap. My family are not big fans of his mainly due to the underemployment issue and he feels this would just make it worse.
How do I convince him that it’s what I really want and who cares what everyone else thinks? As it is we’re either going to elope or have a small wedding with just immediate family and close relatives.
Post # 3
Aw, I’m sorry that you’re having to deal with this! It should not matter AT ALL what anyone else thinks but you because YOU are the one that needs to be happy wearing it the rest of your life! His sister and mom’s opinion shouldn’t mean squat as long as the both of you are happy with the decision. Easier said than done though, trust me I know! My husband felt the same way when I told him I wanted a moissanite instead of a diamond and it took like a month for him to finally accept that it was truly what I wanted. His family tried to give him crap, but when they saw how much I loved the ring, they shut up about it. They later appreciated the open bar at the wedding that we could afford due to not spending money on a diamond. :p
Post # 4
If that is what you want then that is what you should get. Tell him this is your ring not theirs and if you want a moissy and you will be the one who looks at it for the rest of your life so deal with it
Post # 5
I had a similar experience. I have an Amora Moissanite engagement ring and it was more difficult to convince our families than for me to convince my Fiance.
Because our families were unsure about Moissanite, my Fiance also became unsure. But I reminded him that I will be the one wearing it for the rest of my life (not anyone else!) and I will be the one staring at it everyday. In the end, no one else will really care too much. They don’t see the ring on your finger as a reminder, as much as you will.
What matters is that you are happy with it and the loving relationship that it represents.
Unfortunately, society has been convinced that diamonds are the best/only option. But Moissanite is actually even more rare than diamonds, has more sparkle and more “fire” (refraction spectrum), and is almost just as hard, and is even more durable than a diamond. So Moissanite is forever!
I hope you are able to remind your Fi that you will be the one wearing the ring and that in the end, it is supposed to simply represent your love for each other.
Post # 6
Are you close to his sister? Can you talk up moissanite to her and get her on board? Maybe order a loose moissanite stone that can be set in the setting she and your SO pick out together so they can still have that bonding moment?
Post # 7
Maybe you or your FI could kindly suggest to them that this ring is for you, not them. Ultimately it should be about what you want and what your FI wants to get you. There are many reasons why I feel that Moissy e-rings are better, maybe you can explain to them why you might feel the same way (although I don’t recommend talking about how horrible the diamond industry is because most women won’t want to hear that). Good luck and congrats!
Post # 8
I agree that you should talk to him about how this ring is a symbol of the love and commitment between you and your FI. Not anyone’s mom or sister or friend or anyone else. If anyone asks, tell them (or have him tell them) that this is what you want. You could’ve wanted a diamond or a sapphire or an emerald or what have you, but you have chosen Moissanite. You don’t owe an explanation to anyone except your FI.