- 6 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
When I say she hates me for no reason, I mean it. There is no. reason.
She is very emotionally unbalanced, and has a very poor-me negative attitude towards life, so she’s my complete opposite. Speaking to people who know us both, the general consensus seems to be that she’s decided to focus all her anger at the world and at herself into a laser beam pointed at me. It’s completely insane, but I guess she’s just decided that that’s the best way to be. It literally all began when I emailed to ask her to do something simple (and in a very nice way) for a group that we’re both part of, and she took my request to mean that I was publicly denouncing her for doing a bad job. So she sent an angry email to the entire group saying that she is quitting, without a word of explanation except that she “can’t deal with this shit anymore”, and thus began her insane passive-aggressive hatred towards me.
After The Incident (the crazy rage-quit email), I wrote her not one but TWO emails asking what was wrong. Asking if I had offended her. Asking if she was okay, if things in her life were okay, if there was anything I could do to help. She did not respond, but did tell some mutual acquaintances that I was “harassing” her.
Ever since then, she has refused to engage with me on any level. Now, this would be a-okay with me, since I’m not really interested in being friends with emotionally unstable people who border on batshit crazy. But, she’s been behind my back constantly. She trash-talks me to anyone and everyone — she trash-talks me to her friends, to my friends, and even to STRANGERS who she doesn’t know are my friends. Since the rest of us all are above this high school crap, most everyone she says these things to just turns around all tells me about it, trying to make it a joke. “So you won’t believe what your buddy ___ was saying about you the other day, haha. Wow, she really hates you! What a nut!”
I guess it’s nice to have everyone on my side, but … DUDE, it PISSES ME OFF!!! I mean, I keep trying to remind myself that she’s just sad and pathetic and off her rocker, but I still don’t take kindly to someone telling everyone with a set of ears that she can’t be around me because she’ll probably punch me! It makes me say really nasty things. I find myself saying awful things about her weight (she’s at least 100 pounds overweight); I made up a nickname for her that sounds like her real name but involves the C-word … These are not things that I do. I am nice and I like everyone and I don’t use the phrase “great big fat b*tch” to describe people, but that is the monster she is turning me into. It’s just about the only way I can vent my rage towards this girl.
Because her passive-aggressiveness doesn’t give me any outlet to deal with her directly. I would love nothing more than to confront her and demand to know just exactly what her problem with me is. I would love it even more if she DID punch me. But of course, none of that will ever happen, because all she does is bark and then run and hide. I’m like the US Army trying to fight an insurgency: if we ever had it out face to face, I would easily win, so she makes sure that never happens.
So, what can I do? This rage is eating me up. Every time I think about her, I start to steam from the ears. I lay awake nights thinking of better ways to respond to her sneak attacks. Unfortunately, since we are part of the same running group, I can’t really get away from her because we know so many of the same people. And people think our “feud” is funny because the chick is so nuts, but they don’t realize how much her behavior (and my finding out about it) is pissing me off. We are moving away in six weeks, but I’m not even sure I can make it that long without some serious talking-down! BEES! HELP ME!!!!