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Don't list the brunch on the website. Do it by word-of-mouth to the people you want to attend.
Is there any way to serve coffee and donuts for everyone for about an hour the next morning? That's a way to share with everyone and say hello/goodbye to guests. You can put that on the wedding website.
Then the family can meet for brunch about an hour or so later.
I think your idea of a more casual coffee and pastries breakfast would be more inclusive, and would help you achieve your stated goal of spending time with all of your guests.
@LALaw: This or have another invite/rsvp that is sent seperate to those people invited.
Do a continental breakfast rather than a sit down brunch.
Consider serving donuts, pastries, bacon, sausage and fresh fruit... that way your mom and fam can set the buffet and enjoy themselves and you can save some $$$. :)
We are doing a 'weekend wedding' theme too! Have fun!!!
Do either, have coffe and donuts and invite everyone, OR just limit the number to closest friends. If you want, you can suggest places for others to have breakfast--if your mom is hosting..she doesnt have to invite everyone. Another option would be to make it rather early-less people will show up :)
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So my fiance and I are calling our wedding celebration a "Wedding Weekend,"
We don't want to feel like we missed out on seeing anyone, especially since many of our guests are coming from out of state. So we're stretching the "wedding," as long as we can, but of course we're not expecting everyone to come to everything. Here's what we've got on schedule:
Fri:
Rehearsal Dinner
Welcome Party (drinks, dessert, bonfire?)
Sat:
Ceremony and Reception
Sun:
Brunch
Whitewater Rafting
bonfire/possible ridiculous fun games like capture the flag.
Our guestlist is at around 135; we expect between 90 and 115 to actually attend. We rented out a lodge for the weekend that sleeps 25 where people can come to chill/relax when no other events are going on, or crash there if they've partied too hard.
We're sending out invitiations in the mail but are asking that RSVPing be done through our website. We have seperate RSVPs for each event. I'm wondering though, how to handle the day after brunch. The problem is that the lodge cannot seat 100+ people for a meal. (ceremony and reception are off site.) Even bigger, my mother and sisters are making the brunch themselves and cannot feed that many people; I wouldn't want them going too that much trouble. That would be crazy! So we'd like to limit the brunch to immediate family, bridal party, and maybe 1 or 2 additional very close friends. We'd be looking at ~30 people.
While I'm comforable listing the Rehearsal Dinner as "Invited Guests Only," I feel kind of icky about doing that for the brunch, especially since we have additional activities planned for later in the day. So what should I do, bees? Not list the brunch? Invite people in secret? Scrap the idea in favor of coffee and donuts so that everyone could grab some? Help!