Post # 1
I guess I am just wondering how you ladies kept excited? My engagement so far has been nothing but CONSTANT fighting with our families and now, a year later we have absolutely nothing figured out. I wanted to get married in 2014 but most everything is now booked up and I am scared I don’t have anything left in me to plan a wedding. The thought of planning a wedding actually makes me sick now because all I can think about is oh, well if we do that it will make X mad or oh if we do this it will make Y mad….Unfortunately I am a people pleaser through and through and I have troubles being of the mindset “it’s my wedding so only do what will make me happy”.
Anyone else face this? Were you able to still be happy and want to plan your wedding? I have been very against eloping ( as I really want the wedding day with family) but I am starting to think this is the way to go.
Post # 3
@sbruin99: I feel for you…I’ve definitely already had my fair share of this and it drives me nuts how everyone seems to add, “but it’s your wedding day and you need to do whatever truly makes you happy” AFTER they’ve already given their opinion and made you feel like it will just be one more item in your checklist of things to keep in mind when actually planning.
I have always been a people pleaser myself, but my FI is very much the opposite and has always stood firm in his belief that if you try to live your life for everyone else you will never be able to be completely happy and do what you need to enjoy life yourself. It has helped me a lot to be able to lean on him, but for the most part, I am still taking comfort in the fact that my wedding isn’t until June of 2015 and I’m almost hoping some of it will die down on its own if I just move forward making plans on my own and then not tell anyone until I’ve reached a certain point and the plans are already in place. I still feel like there will come a point when I’ll have to sit down with quite a few people and just be strong and tell them this is how it’s going and this is what we’ve decided, and it is what it is. It can definitely be very difficult at times though and we’ve already made many comments about running to city hall to just be married already.
For now, I’m wishing you the best and I hope it does all work out!! Good luck!!!
Post # 4
@sbruin99: So far trying to keep excited by constantly working towards arranging everything that needs to be done and not being bogged down by wondering what everyone else is going to do or say! Its so hard to please everyone (my poor mum was in tears Christmas day over someone I fully intend to invite to the wedding).
At the end of the day I think we just need to remember that we will NEVER please everyone…so many people will still make comments / say things we dont like / talk behind our backs…that is just people. Even I’ve said not very nice things about other peoples plans and weddings in the past.
I know it is really hard to make it “all about us” on our own wedding day and try not to please every one…but we need to put our foot down on the important things in our hearts that we want to do.