- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
I think the sooner the better so that they can possibly invite someone else in your place.
I would say a phone call and apology. Explain that you thought you would be able to travel to the wedding, but you simply aren't able to and you're very sorry you can't make it. I doubt they will ask for any further of an explanation, but probably appreciate you giving them as much notice as possible.
Call them or send a message that although you thought you would be able to make it, unfortunately your plans have changed. Leave it at that. Please, do not wait until right before the wedding! Do it now, happens all of the time!
@tobycat: Just tell them that something came up and you're unable to attend. If they ask for details, just tell them that its work/family/school (pick one that applies to your situation) related and you're really sorry. However, even when I RSVP no to a wedding, I usually send a gift so you may want to consider doing that (if you haven't already).
Thank you rhubarbpie, we would definitely send a gift. The other aspect of this is that he had an affair with this woman, while he was seeing my best friend. It makes it difficult to be in the same room.
@tobycat: I doubt they would ask but mentioning work schedule or family plans should do it.
They are in the same type of business; self-employed, and I am not working right now. ...so that won't work. All our family live near them.
We had about 15 people RSVP yes and then bail the day of the wedding (after we paid for them). I think as long as you tell them, hey, sorry but it turns out we can't make it, they would (should) be appreciative that you let them know before they pay for your plate at the reception (payments are usually due at least a week before the event). You really don't owe them an explanation, the fact you are giving them a heads up well in advance should be enough! Honestly, life happens, things come up, etc. if they are reasonable, they will understand :-)
Tell them now to be polite. There is no polite way to cancel just because you don't want to attend after they have given their numbers to the caterer.
You are never required to give a reason for non-attendance. Send them a short note asap telling them that you regret that you will be unable to attend after all, and wish them a joyous day. Follow up with a gift.
Etiqette expects you to honour your commitments once you have confirmed. Of course with provisions for emergencies, but just changing your mind or because you now want to do something different.
That said, and if you aren't interested in any further relationship with them, call them as soon as possible. I would also be very apologetic, and probably send along a nice gift to apologize for inconviniencing them.
I would not, as some other posters have suggested, offer to pay for your dinner. A polite host would never accept, and it can be considered crass to discuss money.
Thank you all for your replies!.... Yesterday I mailed a beautiful card with a note & a gift certificate that I know they will love, and so all is done.... well in advance so there should be no issues. Thank goodness it's over and done with. thanks again
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Lyndzo | 34 |
| Ms. Salamander | 23 |
| beargoose | 21 |
| his chippymunk | 20 |
| rebwana | 19 |
| mypinkshoes | 18 |
| LammChop | 17 |
| fivemonthsnotice | 17 |
| kat2014 | 15 |
| s.renea9 | 15 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| violet25 | 3 |
| jules28 | 3 |
| simpleandchic | 2 |
| AshleyR83 | 2 |
| rebwana | 2 |
| TwoCityBride | 2 |
| angela85 | 1 |
| AlliRae | 1 |
| pinkandsparkly | 1 |
 CassidyR |
1 |
My husband & I have been invited to an old acquaintance of his wedding in January. We don't particularly care for these people, but rsvp-d yes because we have mutual friends that are going, and some from our club. This is a second marriage for both of them. They have been together 2 years. They have had an engagement party, to which everyone brought gifts. They have had a shower, to which everyone bought gifts. They are having a 'wedding tree', where everyone can put money on it for them, like decorations. They are having a $10,000. honeymoon and have a gift registry at a local travel agency. We live out of state, and it will cost us about $1,000. to go to this wedding. We feel it's just a money event, and my husband and I would like not to go. How do I handle this?... call them sick two days before?? HELP!