How to hint that you want to pick your own ring….

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
1787 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

“I heard that [insert store here] has really nice rings. Want to go look?”

Post # 3
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I don’t beat around the bush.

I told my FI that I didn’t want to be surprised with the ring and could we please go look at some styles together. I ended up picking my 3 favorites and I left the rest up to him.

My FI is not super traditional, so if your BF is very traditional, he may not want you to have any input on the ring.

I’d just show him pictures of ring styles that you like and use that to broach the topic of looking at rings together.

Post # 4
599 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

Just tell him outright. Honesty is the best policy

Post # 5
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

LLMMCC:  “I would like to pick out my own ring”. 

I don’t understand why 1. women don’t make absolutely clear what they like and 2. guys try to wing it alone EVER. I set up a pinterest page with examples of rings I liked and would be happy receiving. I also saved the screen saver on the computer to what my dream ring was. 🙂

Post # 6
2895 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

yeah, i would just come right out and say it. guys aren’t very good about taking hints sometimes, lol.

my husband had been showing me rings to get my opinion, but i hadn’t considered actually picking out my ring, until i came across it on a website (totally by chance). so one day when he was showing me rings again, i was like, “ooh, that’s pretty…but can i show you something?” i think at first he was a little disappointed that he didn’t get to pick the ring himself, (really, i would have been happy with any of the rings he picked), but he was happy that i ended up with something i really love and is pretty unique.

Post # 7
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Mount Hermon

LLMMCC:  I just told him.  He was a little disappointed that he couldn’t surprise me, but got over it pretty quick.  He surprised me with the proposal itself.

Just say “I’m fairly picky.  I will be wearing this ring for many, many years, and possibly the rest of my life.  I want to choose something I love.”  And then give him other ways that he can surprise you.  The proposal, a gift on the wedding day, etc.

Post # 8
339 posts
Helper bee

I just told him.  Told him I’d find one I’d like and he could buy it when it’s ready.  He doesn’t have to guess what I want and I get to pick something awesome (within budget).  I’m sure he would have done fine on his own, but now he’ll do great. Lol.

Post # 9
3623 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

LLMMCC:  Open facebook. Comment “so and so got engaged. I loved that her ring was so her. I think she and FI went ring shopping together, which is something I think is so important to do together. It would be horrible to have someone you love spend that kind of money on something that wasn’t your taste that you would have to wear every day of your life”

My caveat is sometimes you can ring shop without going ring shopping. My way of ring shopping was a 2 paragraph email on the specs I think are the best value with the setting I liked from Blue Nile. DH would have never entertained ring shopping with me pre-engagement. Post marriage he has watched couples do it and think it looks awesome, but there was not a shot in hell of him going into a store to look at a ring. And even less of a shot of him bringing me.

Post # 10
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Just tell him you want input on the ring and you’d be happy to show him the ones you love.

Post # 11
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Christmas Tree Farm

I told H that I wanted to have a say in what kind of ring I got but he really wanted to make the final decision, so we compromised and went ring shopping together. When he was ready to propose, he went and bought it by himself, but because of our shopping trips he knew exactly what I wanted.

Post # 12
579 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Does it have to be the entire ring that you pick? For me, I told FI that princess was my favorite, and the more sparkle the better. He ran with it and I love the ring he picked out.

Maybe you could just give some pointers on your “must haves” for a ring? That way, he’s still picking it, but you’re more “in control”.

Post # 13
1354 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

I told him straight out.  He borrowed a ring from his mum (it had been his grandmother’s) as a stand-in to propose with and we went together to find the real thing the next day.

Post # 14
8677 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Men don’t do subtle. You need to to be like a lighthouse and scream “Listen to me god damnit.” Just tell him straight out.

Post # 15
1256 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I was straightforward as well. I am very picky and FI would have been terrified to mess up and have me hate it. We ended up doing a custom design. 

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