How to incorporate a mother who has passed away into your wedding?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I’m in the same boat. My mom died 5 years ago so I’m trying to figure out what to do. I figured I’d put something in the program but I want to do something else. Something more visual but not too much. Hope to hear some ideas.

Post # 4
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

I am very sorry to hear about your Mom, here are a few ideas that may help. In remembrance of my Grandmother I added one of her broaches to the ribbon on my bouquet. It looked beautiful and meant a lot to me. We also mentioned loved ones who passed away during our ceremony.

Post # 5
Member
228 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

My heart goes out to all of the brides who won’t have their mom with them on their wedding day. My fiance lost his mom 2 years ago, before we got engaged.  I saw someone else’s post on attaching a locket to a boutonniere so I think I’ll get a photo charm or a locket for him.  You could add a charm or locket to your bouquet and if you’re having a program mention your mom in it.  I’m sure you’ll find tons of other ideas on the site as you read more, like putting a flower on the chair she would have sat in, etc. 

I’m sorry I couldn’t find the post I’m remembering but the lockets and photo charms can be found at http://www.picturesongold.com.

Remember that your mom will be with you in spirit.  Hugs.

Post # 7
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Thanks LindseyMarie52 and everyone else for the great ideas. I have some of her jewelry that I may incorporate in my bouquet but I also love the idea of adding a flower in honor of my mom. I’ve got some time to figure it out. Thanks!

Post # 8
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: July 2010

My mom passed away ten years ago and want to remember her in the cermony.

I read this response from someone else on the web. 

<span class=”Apple-style-span” style=”color: #333333; font-family: arial; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px”>If you can handle the emotion of it, have the officiant mention your mother and have a very brief moment of silence. I was at a wedding once where they honored a grandmother who had just passed away. The officiant said, "Let us pause for a moment, and in this quiet space, listen for [bride’s grandmother’s] joy that she surely is sending us right now in spirit." It was very emotional and the bride started crying a bit. 

I will probably do this and cry like a baby:( 

Post # 9
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

One of my friends did something a little different to honor her deceased mother. One of the ushers came down the aisle carrying a quilt her mother made right in lieu of actually escorting her mom down the aisle to her seat, and put the quilt in a reserved seat in the front. Then the quilt was brought to the reception and had it’s own chair there with a little "In honor of.." card sitting on it, which was a tribute from the bride to her mom.  I think they also included a description of it in the wedding program. It was very touching and meaningful and brought us all to tears 🙂

Post # 10
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2018

Iawa306- TEARS- this brought tears to me.  how sweet and joyful and very sentimental.

Post # 11
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2010

my mother and my grandmother passed away (15 and 5 years ago respectively) and my fiance also lost both of his parents about 10 years ago… what i plan to do is have "seatholder" boquets with my mom and grandmothers favorite flowers and most likely do the same for his parents as well. our flowering offering to the virgin mary will also be yellow roses. at the reception were putting a table to the side, i have a picture with my mom and grandmother from my first communion and my finace has an old family picture, im going to put them in nice frames with the flowers and a candle with most likely a guest book if people want to write something there instead of reminding us all day. though i’ve had 3 graduations without her, my wedding day will probably be the hardest, so my heart goes out to you guys 🙂

Post # 12
Member
7054 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

My grandparents on one side are gone, and my father passed away 10 years ago this summer.  It will be very bittersweet with him not there.  My grandfather and son will be walking me down the aisle, but I was going to either leave a boutinerre and an "in memory of" card in that chair..or his favorite hat.  I just am afraid to see that, because it would make me cry.  It makes me cry thinking of him not being there.  I don’t want to make my mom cry either, but I have to acknowledge dad somehow. 

I plan on having near my sign in book, some family photos and I will have them of my dad and grandparents in a special corner, with some candles around it..and a few flowers. 

Post # 13
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

My mother and I were best friends, she just passing away almost 3 years ago now.  These are all wonderful wonderful suggestions and will be doing an assortment of these tributes in my ceremony.  My youngest brother (18) who was going to walk me down the aisle recently passed away within the last 2 months.  Does anyone have any further suggestions as to how I can honor him. 

Post # 14
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

My dad passed about 13 years ago. My mother remarried, and my stepdad has always been so amazing to me, and I am his only "daughter". I figured my daddy wouldnt mind letting my stepdad stand in his place for all the "Father-daughter" things… especially since I know my stepdad would be sad to miss out on those…

so we are playing my dads favorite song and having my sister light a memory candle in honor of him. I will also have his picture in a nice frame at his seat at the reception table.. and his name and the song will be mentioned in the program.

Post # 15
Member
2205 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

You could do a memorial candle as well, with an "in memory of" label band around the candle.  I love the idea of the picture charm on the bouquet.

@ <font size=”2″ color=”#81a026″>lawa306</font>: my aunt used to quilt and she passed away a few years ago, about 8 months before her daughter’s wedding.  They did the same thing, and it was a very sweet gesture

Post # 16
Member
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I have seen several different things-you could place a perfect bloom of her favorite flower somewhere on the alter or incorporate it into your bouquet. I think memory candles are also lovely-siblings can light it, you can incorporate that flame into your unity candle ceremony. On a more personal level, you can plant a push or flowering plant in your yard in her memory. Is there any way you can instill something of hers into your attire for the day? Is there some jewlery that you can use for your something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue? I also think that a mention in the program is nice

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