how to invite co-workers and etiquette

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3633 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I invited coworkers and managers (mostly managers) to my wedding and it worked out great. I invited enough to make a table so they can talk to each other. I wanted them to have some semblance of privacy, so I did not ask them for addresses/contact information. I hand-delivered the invitations since I did see them every day. I gave them pre-stamped RSVP cards but they all hand-delivered the RSVPs back to me.

I would still give the coworkers with potential maternity leave an invitation because honestly, you never know. I’m currently PG and a control freak, so I personally wouldn’t attend a social event in those first few months but I know other people would be more than happy to have a sitter/relative watch their baby while they attended. Further, just because a couple starts TTC is no guarantees they will get PG immediately.

I work in a male-dominated environment and it was fine having my managers and colleagues there. They had fun chatting amongst themselves. If your managers don’t feel comfortable attending, they will decline. I have a friend who is an attorney and the legal assistant there invited the entire office (including the partners of the firm). Many of the associates went but all of the partners declined but sent a company gift.

I would definitely invite SOs if available. One of my invitees substituted out his +1 with someone else and I didn’t argue with that (even though I know that’s frowned upon). I figured I have to see these people daily so there’s no point in causing drama over one person. My office guests were some of the more enthusiastic guests, which was a pleasant surprise.

Post # 4
7019 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@thelittleone:  Your SO is wrong. You do not need to invite the other co-workers. (He is right though that if you invite them you should invite their partners).

It is fine to invite no one, it is also to only invite the two you socialise with. Where it gets awkward is when you invite most of the office, because then some people are left out.

I invited only one (who couldn’t come). There were no regrets, no hard feelings, no repercussions. I was in a larger office (about 40 people) but very close knit and lots of us the same age. In fact there were about 5 weddings over a year or two. I wasn’t invited to any others either (even though some co-workers were) and I was ok with that too.

Post # 5
22 posts
  • Wedding: October 2013

You need to do whatever makes you comfortable. You said you might feel shy so if I were you I would just invite the 2 people (plus partners) you are closest to in your office for the entire day. And if you want everyone else there, just invite them and their partners to the evening.

I have a similar dilemma. I work in an office of 20 (so plus partners it would be around 35). I am only really close to 2  of my co-workers so have invited them to the whole thing and everybody else will get their own invite. I am trying to decide whether to hand deliver the invites to each person at work or if I should send it to their home addresses… I would definitely prefer to fo the later but, as you say, it’s a case of getting everyone’s addresses!

Post # 6
968 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@thelittleone:  I would just invite the two with their husbands, not all of them. I invited 3 of my co-workers to my wedding and not the others. I did ask for their mailing address in an email but I gave them the invites in person anyways, and I asked them not to make a big deal of it since I wans’t inviting many people from work 🙂

Post # 7
6158 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i do see a few of my coworkers outside of work, but i did not invite any of them.


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