(Closed) How to keep my cool during all of this drama? Please give advice!!!

posted 8 years ago in September 2010
Post # 3
Member
2186 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

sorry to be completely honest you need a new bridal party. *sigh* but not much you can do with just a couple weeks to the wedding. remember you can only do what you can do, its your wedding.

and quite frankly if you piss off the folks you dont like, who cares, since you dont like them anyway?

i know it sounds harsh but why even deal with the drama if you dont need to?

the problem children, just keep them out of things and hope they show up the day of, or maybe they wont and you can have a stress free day.

Post # 4
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow. This is why we decided to not have a bridal party, and did not ask our parents to contribute to the guest list. Soooo glad I decided to have the wedding in a place where none of our parents live. Made things so much easier. I don’t have advice, other than do what you want, because it sounds like you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

Post # 5
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I second crayfish. Poor you! I’d threaten them with being booted, if you were prepared for the possibility of strolling up the aisle without their “support”?!!

Have your mom/aunt anything to say about the BM behaviour? It sounds extremely childish at their age. Or can you manage to goad one of them into saying something snotty in front of their mom/dad, so someone else can see how they’re treating you?

Sorry, that’s prob just as childish, and no help!

Have you a honeymoon to look forward to, after your big day? I hope so!

Post # 6
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

As regards your MOH, I know this is no use to you at this stage, but I’m pre-empting this one by controlling this stuff myself. If I don’t, there’ll be dodgy nightclubs, lapdances, willy straws and all other sorts of nonsense that are just not me. It’s my wedding, so it follows, as far as I can see, that I should enjoy my bach party!

Mind you, they’d all be screaming Bridezillaaaah at me if I said that out loud!

Post # 7
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It always amazes me how much other people can make YOUR day all about them. I’m having issues with my future sister in law whose husband is allegedly going to be a groomsman…we’ll see if they show up.

My bridal party is small and I’ve had no issues, but my best friends had to ask 2 of her original BMs not to be in the wedding because of things they did that really hurt my friend. It’s an uncomfortable decision to make, but it sounds like they don’t really WANT to be standing up for you, either. And in reality, the drama isn’t your fault; you’re reacting to things that are happening to you. 

I don’t know what to say about the head count… 363 is a lot of people! FMI should be pitching in on the cost!!

Focus on the fact that at the end of the day, no matter what happens in between, you’re going to be married to your best friend…and then you get to go on vacation!

Post # 8
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow. I dont know how you are doing such a huge wedding on such a small budget, but that is AWESOME! Good for you!

What does the sister of the maid that is being a beoch saying? Does she know about the issue? I guess I would sit her down and be honest and ask her why she is acting this way. Tell her she is causing you strife instead of helping. Ask her if she wants to be in the wedding? In a nice way- not like you are going to kick her out (even though you should). Maybe there is more to her story than it seems?

Your FMIL, she did kick in for all of these extra guests, I hope! how did invites get to people that you didn’t want invited? Did you give them to your FMIL? OOPS!

I’m with you on the cost of the bachelorette party. Rediculous to spend that kind of cash on that! I feel badly for your friend that was left out because of the cost.

Boy, I’m glad I only have 1 attendant!

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