Post # 1
My Maid/Matron of Honor is getting married several months after me, and I am Maid/Matron of Honor in her wedding too.
Her FI’s mom has been struggling with severe health complications unexpectedly the past several months and recently she has been moved to more of a palliative status. My Maid/Matron of Honor and her Fiance are suddenly planning a small civil ceremony at the hospital chapel so his mom can be present, and will “renew their vows” at their planned wedding this summer.
I would love to do something special to support them both through this time. I am on standby for when the civil ceremony will occur, as she has asked me and my Fiance to attend, but what else might I do to help them or show support beyond just being there?
I know there is no reason to do more, but I’d like to make sure my Maid/Matron of Honor feels special on her unanticipated day, and that I can somehow honor the emotional significance for both of them.
Post # 3
@FoolsintheRain: First and foremost, just be there. As a long time friend, you will know as the time comes if she needs something specific. All she really needs for now is your support.
If you want to do something nice in addition to that (get her nicer flowers, or something to decorate in the hospital) that’s fine. Let your best friend be the guide.
Post # 4
Wow. I’m so sorry for them. I had nothing to suggest besides just being there. I like what the previous poster said about getting her flowers and perhaps decorating a little.
Post # 5
@ellabee: @Bubbles42: Thanks for the advice. I agree that mostly I can only offer my support and be there when she needs me, but I do think I’ll make sure to help with decorating and making it feel as special as possible for them!
Post # 6
I suggest you ask her if she would like you to find a lovely bed jacket for her mother, assume responsibilty for some floral decor, music, a makeup artist for her and her Mom etc. She may not want any of them, but will appreciate your thoughtfulness.
When my SIL was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor we arranged for a photographer to come and do a family portrait. Her mother treasures that picture.
Sometimes in these situations, it’s difficult to even focus on what decisions need making, much less make them yourself.
Post # 7
@julies1949: Excellent suggestions! We’re getting together for a hike tomorrow so I’ll touch base with her then!