Post # 1
Six months ago i told my mum that she had to write a guestlist for my wedding invitation. Six months later she STILL didnt have a list. So i physically went down to her house and sat with her and my family to make one.
Last week i got my invites printed and they arrived yesterday, so i was telling my mum that she would have her invites this week to give out to her friends and family.
Today i get a phone call from her telling me she forgot some people she wants to invite (mind you we have reached absolute capacity and then some, so if everyone accepts whe are in trouble!) I just told her i would have to call her back. See i know she will get very upset about everything even tho it is my fiance and I paying for the entire wedding.
Not long after my sister (MOH) messages me saying she wants to invite some of her friends, when i asked her who she listed like 6 friends (two of whom i paticularly dont like because they have in the past actually had interest in my fiance). I havent replied yet, she thinks i am at work so…
How do i tell my mum she had her time to make a list, and now i honestly cannot have these extra people that i have never even met in my life! or my sister about her “friends” (she also changes friends like the seasons)
How do i tell them in a polite way that we have reached capacity and cannot invite anyone else !
Post # 3
Tell them the venue will not allow anyone else to be invited due to fire codes.
who cares if thats not the truth? No fighting about it. =)
Post # 4
Agree with the above. My grandma invited several people I didn’t invite, at the CEREMONY (not just reception). I’m still mad about it! It’s the rudest thing.
Post # 5
You just have to be firm about it and tell them you are at the budget as well as building capacity. Yes it’s a party but not a PARTY.
Post # 6
I’m guessing you resolved the issue around fiance’s family inviting 12 times more guests than your parents?
I think, like others have said, just be upfront about with your family – the last thing you want is them thinking they can invite people, so going ahead and inviting them, because then you’ve got all the issues of uninviting people.
Post # 7
Tell them that once the invitiations were sent out, your guest list was final. All of the allocated space has now been taken up, and there is no room to invite anyone else. Tell them you’ll let them know if there are enough declines to warrant sending out a few extra invitations, but you can’t make any guarantees.
Post # 8
@LadyElva: Yes, thank goodness its a now much smaller EQUAL wedding, and we are happily paying for it! 🙂
I might go with the fire hazard lie, it seems to me like it may be the only way of not hurting and offending everyone..
Post # 9
I am in a very similar situation…. except it’s FIs family who are causing the issues! Luckily Fiance is very supportive and has pretty much just told them a straight up no. We asked for a definitive list for a reason…. they were given a very generous number of invites to begin with considering they are not helping financially… and we don’t know these people at all!
I would definitely tell them that your venue maximum is already met and that even if that were not the case you are not prepared to add additional guests financially.