Post # 1
For those of you who eloped, how did you tell others?
This may turn into a vent. We eloped two weeks ago, and my mom & step dad were two of the only people who knew we were going to elope (we only got the date a week before). We had no one with us at the wedding, which was what we wanted. Right after, we made a Facebook event to invite a few friends to dinner, and we both texted a few people some pictures. I was going to tell my dad, but he hasn’t been great about returning phone calls. We have a somewhat strained relationship, and I don’t feel like going into details. I wanted to tell him in person, or at the very least on the phone (as with most people). He texted me Friday to invite me to a cookout at his house on Sunday, and we texted back and forth a bit. My partner and i decided we would just see if anyone commented on our rings (we did the same thing at dinner with friends on Friday). Nope. Not at all. Each time I was going to tell my dad, something came up in conversation that I didn’t want to take away from. So I left without telling him. I texted him after to thank him, and haven’t heard back. Any advice?
Post # 3
You mentioned Facebook, did you change your status to married there?
I plan on mailing a picture and keepsake afterwards to friends and family.
Post # 4
I would ask him to meet for lunch or something and tell him person. As for your friends, send out a marriage announcement!
Post # 5
@sweetbutdemanding: We haven’t changed our status on there yet, we were waiting til we told most of teh people we care about. I am afraid if I change it on there I’ll hurt his feelings. Also, not sure if it matters, but on FB his account is shared with his wife and I’m not sure how often he/they use it. We did get some photos that I plan to put on the front of a postcard with a message about us eloping to send to people (but my mom told me it sounds like I’m hitting them up for gifts so now I don’t know)
@Birdee106: when I texted him Sunday evening I let him know that I had a great time, thanked him, and said I’d really like to get dinner with him sometime (mentioned, if “you’re free this week that’d be great!”). No response (and it’s not like he’s busy with work; he’s retired)
Post # 6
@MsLobizon: My hubby eloped, so I’ve been dealing with all of the family drama. Unfortunately, it’s caused some drama but it has also shown us who REALLY cares about us.
I would say that you send your Dad an elopement announcement since it sounds like there’s not a great chance of getting your news across any other way. We sent out this announcement the morning that we were leaving to go to the coast and elope, so most people received it the next day.
Besides that, we’re mailing thank you cards with a wedding photo on them and if anyone wants pictures, they can contact me and I’ll send them a link to the photo album.
Honestly, it sounds like you’ve been trying your hardest to tell your father. Go ahead, change your Facebook information. If he gets hurt by it, just let him know that you tried to tell him multiple times, but he didn’t allow for it to happen. You shouldn’t feel guilty that you had the wedding that you wanted! We had people try and guilt trip us, too, but you can’t let it bother you. The people who truly care about you two will only care that two people who they love are now joined in marriage.
If you need to chat more or vent, just shoot me a PM 🙂
Post # 7
@MsLobizon: So you would like to tell your dad that you eloped? Is this correct? And invite him to your dinner you ave planned?
It sounds like he just doesn’t get what you’re doing, so you might have to come right out and tell him in person or over the phone.
Another clueless parent story here… my mom KNEW we were elopeing prior. I then posted some pro pics on Facebook one week later. I emailed the link to all the family. I knew my mom would be at my sister’s house where there was good internet. I told my sister, PLEASE show mom my photos will you? She said she would.
I get on the phone with my mom that same night, we talk for a whole hour. Not one word about seeing my wedding photos. I had to bring it up before she would hang up. She just totally forgot. I don’t get her deal; is she really that ditzy? Nevertheless, it really hurt my feelings!
Post # 8
My husband called my mother the day after we married. She congratulated us, but she was PISSED, along with my dad.
I also sent announcements out.
Post # 9
We texted a picture to family and friends (the cell phone version of this since pro pix weren’t in yet) and put it on our social media pages.
what did you end up doing?