- 3 years ago
- Wedding: May 2015 - The Runnymede Hotel
Ok, so I am feeling like a really terrible person. I met my fiance at University, where I had three close friends, Z, S and E. E was a guy I met on my very first day, and we ended up living together throughout the whole three years we studied – he is a great friend, and I have asked him to be my bridesman. Z and S were both girls i met through a course we studied together for a term, though I was initially cloest to Z, my friendship with S developed and became more rewarding to the point where we actually lived together for a year.
Z, S and I all had partners thrpughout or time at Uni, and so we would often fantasise about weddings and promised to be each others bridesmaids.
Flash forward to today, we graduated two years ago, E, S and myself have moved away, while Z chose to remain in our University town. S and I live in London and see each other fequently for aferwork drinks, etc. I was thrilled to ask her to be my bridesmaid. My Best woman is going to be my oldesy friend from home, E will be a bridesman and… I no longer want Z to be bridesmaid.
My reasons are:
1. I rarely see her as she refuses to leave our (very small) university town.
2. When I go out to visit her (maybe twice a year), I find we have less and less in common. This is no ones fault, it is perfectly natural, but there is not much to talk about.
3. We don’t really communicate via text, phonecall or social networking either, as she often says she is too ‘busy’.
4. The only think she has been interested in regarding my engagement has been what dress she is wearing, and will she have to pay for it? (In the UK it is traditional for the bride to buy the bridesmaid dresses, but not everyone follows tradition).
So because of the percieved promise we all made when we were 19/20, she believes she is a bridesmaid. And in my happiness and excitement early in the engagement I haven’t yet said anything to dissuade her 🙁
So yeah, I feel like a terrible person, but what do I do??