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@UKBuzz: You don't have to tell her that she's not going to be a bridesmaid. Just keep moving along with the planning.
If she does bring it up at some point, just have something ready to say like you could only have 3 to make numbers even with your FI. Or you don't even need to give her an explanation. It's completely up to you who you have in your bridal party. And this girl Anna sounds like more of a pain then a good friend.
Does your friend Jo ever hang out just with Anna? Does she share your feelings about Anna? Could she run interference if Anna brings it up to her when you aren't around?
I'd love to know how this turned out for you, since I am in a very similar situation with two friends. I want one to be my BM, but not the other. I've already asked the one and she's said yes, but I'm worried about the other's reaction when she finds out!
You don't need to say anything- just keep planning.... if she ever questions just say you wanted to keep the numbers even, nothing personal.
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Morning Bees!!
I am having a bit of a dilemma about bridesmaids, and wondered if anyone else had experienced something similar or could advise...
Basically, I'm having three bridesmaids - my sister (MOH), a good friend who I was bridesmaid for a couple of years ago, plus another girl who I have known for 6 years, and who I've lived with for 2-3 of those, and like very much (let's call her Jo).
The only trouble is, at the same time as meeting Jo, I also met her friend Anna, and during the next 4-5 years, the three of us have pretty much always met up in a group of 3, gone out together etc. I did consider having Anna as a BM as well, but, without being mean, I just know from being let down by her countless times before that she would be a pain in the @ss... not only from a 'probably trying to upstage everyone else' kind of way (she is a bit of a diva), but also because she is constantly late for everything, never turns up with the right stuff, and is generally a bit of a liability.
As an example, I invited her and Jo around to my flat the other night so I could cook them dinner; Anna agreed that she would make brownies for dessert, so I thought great-that's sorted. But instead, she turned up an hour late (with no explanation), with a box of brownie mix and no other ingredients. She then got really snarky because I a) was already using my baking sheet to cook dinner, and b) didn't have four eggs instantly available to her to cook the brownie mix with. So I then had to go to the supermarket, at about 9.30pm with my other friend to buy her eggs!! I was so mad that at that point I just thought 'screw it' and bought a ready-made dessert instead as I couldn't bear any more of her dramas.
Afterwards, I thought "this is what she'd be like the entire time if she were a bridesmaid", and believe me, that is not the only example of things like that - many times she has turned up so late to meet me that I've had to leave before she got there (1-1.5hrs late) etc.
So my question is - how do I handle telling her that I don't want her to be a bridesmaid?! I have already asked Jo, and she has accepted, and so far has been fab.
But I am dreading Anna finding out, (not sure if she already does), but she is such a diva, I am just anticipating her kicking off about it... what do you think, Bees? Please help! x