Post # 1
Hi Bee’s –
This has been an on-going issue with my Boss but I’ve never found the right timing to bring it up to her.
Here’s the deal:
I currently work for a non-profit and my office hours are 8:30 – 5 Monday – Friday. Bee’s, I love my job it’s wonderful, but I value my family more than my job…always have, always will. My Boss is a work obsessed type of person, she on average gets in at 8:30 and stays until about 8pm – 9pm. We are not open on the weekends but she works every Saturday all day and most Sunday afternoons. I’m going on my 3rd year working here and i’ve only seen her take 3 days off and that’s because her dying friend begged her to come see her.
This is always strange to me because she has adult children and grandchildren she could be spending her time with. It’s obvious to me that she fills her time up with work, but that’s her choice, not mine.
To make a long story short, I always get crap because I don’t stay past 5. I don’t make a lot of money here and I don’t get paid overtime, so at 5 i’m out of here. Today I got here at 8:32 and my boss mentioned that when I come in late then I need to stay later to make up the difference. I didn’t make a big deal out of it but the more I think about it the more I get annoyed. There have been SO many days when I’ve stayed late, spent my own money on supplies, etc.
All of my co-workers have children, and it’s not a big deal when they leave to go pick there kids up from school and “work from home” the rest of the day. But I know they are not working anymore when they get home. Sometimes it’s like, why am I being punished for not having kids?
Is this something that I need to bring up with her? I just want her to know that work/life balance is extremely important to me. Thanks for reading!
Post # 3
I would not do this. I am the same way, but you need to just listen to her and smile. Don’t create an issue where there doesn’t need to be one!
Post # 4
I wouldn’t say anything. I would show up to work on time and if I don’t, then just stay the extra 2 minutes after. I don’t think this is worth making a big deal out of, but you do have every right to leave at 5 unless you get paid overtime, and you shouldn’t have to be buying supplies.
Post # 5
- Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand
I agree with PP, I would leave it alone. Unless you have an amazing excuse for being “late” AND for having to leave at 5 today I wouldn’t say anything.
Post # 6
I was “late” today because school started back on the east coast and it threw my usual travel time off. I use to get to work at 8:15 because I am an early kind of person, BUT being I was never allowed to leave early I didn’t see the point in continuing to arrive early.
This is so frustrating, but you all are probably right…I should leave it alone.
Post # 7
I have the same issue. My coworker gets all the time off in the world for her children. And even got extended maternity leave even though she has worked her for less than a year.
I got yelled at for taking a day off to help my mom when she was in the hospital.
But we cannot say anything unfortunately. Just suck it up and work 2 extra minutes. 😉
Post # 8
If you’re getting crap for not working past 5 when your hours are 8:30-5, next time she mentions it I would just say “my hours are 8:30-5. If you want me to work longer hours on a regular basis we can negotiate a different schedule; until then, unless there’s something urgent, I’m going to be leaving at 5.
I would not go into your philosophies on work-life balance because I work with somebody like your boss, too, and believe me, she won’t care.
ETA: Yeah, it was only 2 minutes, but if she’s regularly whining about you not working outside your agreed-upon working hours, try to shut that down!
Post # 9
@sailor: I really felt it when she said “she won’t care” because the reality is she won’t. I will make sure I am here at 8:30 for now on, but I am still leaving at 5.
Post # 10
@Meant2Bee: While I wouldnt bring it up again unless SHE does, I totally get where you are coming from.
On my team, pretty much everyone has children. I do not have any of my own, but FI has two from a previous relationship. There is one woman who is permitted to leave early a couple of times a week for either a planned school pickup or an “emergency” related to her child that came up and she has to leave. She was also allowed to take a day off for her kids first day of school so she could “get pictures of her getting on the bus.” This same person comes in late nearly every day. It could be affecting her behind the scenes, but nothing I see.
In addition, there is *another* woman who is allowed to leave early every week to drop her kids off at their dads house…and by early, I mean 1:30pm.
…but me asking to leave early to pick up FIs kids? Forget it. Or leaving in early in general, for that matter.
So, trust me: you are not the only one out there dealing with this, unfortunately :-/ Seems to be an entirely different set of standards.
Post # 11
@Meant2Bee: If you want to keep your job, I wouldn’t say anything. Everyone knows that people prefer being with their families over working so it’s not something that needs to be said. She is the boss, so you need to accomodate her (even if you don’t like her). Arrive at 8:28 AM and ensure all of your work is done. If there is no need to do overtime, then don’t. If there is, then do it (if you want to keep this job).
Post # 12
I think the answer depends on what you want out of this job. If you want a raise/promotion I think you need to combat the perception that you are a clock watcher. If you are happy with things as they are then show up at 8:29 and leave at 5:01. Definitely don’t bring up work/life balance because you are implying that your boss doesn’t make time for her family which probably won’t go over well.
Post # 13
I spent more than 25 years in the workforce, the majority of which were as an FLSA exempt employee who worked a lot of hours.
If you are FLSA exempt from overtime but are only working a 40-hour work week, while your boss is working all kinds of extra hours, this likely is not making you look — to her — as if you are invested in your job or your potential for growth within the organization.
It may not seem “fair,” but it may very well be the case.
Post # 14
I can’t imagine a boss like that! Ugh!
I wouldn’t say anothing, though.
Post # 15
The growth point is an excellent point. I do not see myself growing any further within this organization. I plan on going back to get my masters next fall and then onto my PhD. However, even if this weren’t the case there aren’t any jobs I could move up to anyways. I have already been promoted once, gotten two raises, so my work is always excellent.
Whenever I have worked on a Saturday for a special event we don’t get paid, instead we get comp time….but my boss always makes me feel like a horrible person for using my comp days.
Post # 16
@Meant2Bee: Well, if you’ve been promoted and have received merit raises, then you definitely are doing good work. 🙂
I used to earn compensatory time as well, and I am very thankful that, for the most part (there were some exceptions), I had bosses who were supportive of my taking it when workload (and office coverage during business hours) permitted.