How To Tell Your "photographer" friend you hired someone else…

posted 3 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
3846 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m very glad to hear you have hired a professional photographer for your wedding.

Perhaps you can simply tell your friend that you will be delighted for him to take candid shots but that you and your FI have hired a professional photographer for your special day.  

The officiant/ushers are usually more than willing to make an announcement about keeping the aisle clear for the official photographer. 

Post # 4
1951 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Laurley_87:  I would just tell her that you’d rather her BF be there as a guest so he can enjoy the wedding and not have to work the whole time. He wouldn’t be able to dance, eat with her, hang out, etc. I don’t think they understand that a photographer should be pretty much invisible at weddings. You don’t want her to miss out on attending your wedding basically alone. 

Post # 5
631 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@Laurley_87:  Good choice! 8 months is nuts and so is losing wedding photos. It will be difficult but it’s important to be upfront about it and be very clear that he will not be the photographer. If you beat around the bush and say “wellllll you can take some pictures” he may try to shoot and impede the pro you hired (there is one at every wedding). Just say “hey we decided we want you to enjoy the day and be fully present so we have hired a professional photographer!” and I think that should be enough. 

Post # 6
251 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Laurley_87:  I had the same problem with our ex photographer. He was my fiances uncle, something about his photography I never liked and 2 weeks before wedding finally  stood up and said NO to his photography. Sadly my mother in law was pissed and called to cancel him. the uncle was upset because he heard it from someone else.

 Like you said: I am not planning to do this again so I knew I need  profecional photographer and I got it. Just cancel him, people will be hurt but who cares, you are the one who needs to be suttisfied with your photos.

Post # 7
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I assume he’s invited. Just say to your friend that you want her and her boyfriend to ENJOY the wedding. 

Post # 8
218 posts
Helper bee

You could also try the ” someone already purchased a photo package for us as a gift ” excuse.




Post # 9
5162 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’d tell that you heard about how backed up he is with work and that you don’t want your wedding to be an added stress to him, so you’ve gone ahead an hired a seperate photographer.

Not sure how to deal with the room and airfare that you already paid for…. 

Post # 12
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - Philadelphia, PA

@Laurley_87:  I would just be honest with him and say that you decided to hire a professional, he’s more than welcome to take some personal shots with his camera, and you’re thrilled to have him at your wedding as a guest.

I had a similar situation with one of FI’s co-workers who is a photographer and has shot several affairs for his family.  Upon hiring our photographer, we let him know right away so it would come directly from us and not somebody else, and he wished us the best and told us to contact him with any other vendor-related questions.

Post # 13
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Laurley_87:  Say something like ” I really just want you to enjoy the day and not be working”

Post # 14
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008 - A tiny town just outside of Glacier National Park

Wedding photographer here. If he really is that behind, he’ll probably be relieved. Tell him you really appreciate his generous offer, but that you’d like him to be able to enjoy the wedding as a guest, rather than working. And don’t worry about it too much. 🙂

Leave a comment

Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors