(Closed) How to track down guests who havent RSVP'd by deadline?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

Well, they have until Friday to respond so they havent done anything that is “bad etiquette” yet. The majority of our RSVP’s came the last week. Also, many guests for some reason wait until the last day to actually send it out. So we still got RSVP’s in the mail for about a week after the deadline.

I would try to relax and just wait for Friday or early next week. If you are still missing some, then go ahead and start calling/emailing.

Post # 5
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I understand your frustration. My deadline is Friday (March 1). I have gotten back 40 out of 150. I have been contacting them since last week. I also posted a status on facebook reminding people. That got me about 10 more. Try that.

Post # 6
Member
5479 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I gave our guests a “grace period” the weekend following our deadline.  Some people don’t mail the RSVPs until the due date, so give them a few days to trickle in.

After that, either call or e-mail (or better yet, delegate that to your mothers… FMIL can call her side, your mom can call your side)…

…OR…

do what I did- If you didn’t reply and indicate a meal choice, and you choose to show up anyway, we had an extra table in the back and you can sit there and nibble on veggies during cocktail hour.  You don’t reply, you don’t get a seat, you don’t get a meal.  No skin off my back 😛  I realize that’s a bit of a hard line, but our guest list was over 200 people and I’m not spending every waking moment calling people who are intelligent enough to drop a pre-stamped, pre-addressed envelope in the mail.

Post # 8
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@DaneLady:  I love you. HA! I am considering hiring security to kick the people out. HAHA jk maybe not that harsh but i want to so bad!

Post # 9
Member
2335 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

First, have people indicated that they’re coming (verbally told you, told your parents, booked a hotel room, etc) but not sent an RSVP card?  I’m taking whatever I can get at this point and am counting those things as a “yes.”  Otherwise, ask people through whatever means you usually talk to them- phone, email, or facebook.  Wait until after your mail is delivered on Friday to ask people, however.

Post # 10
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mjwyatt84:  Don’t stress. Ask your FMIL to give them a call. They won’t mind if you explain the situation.

Post # 12
Member
2335 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@mjwyatt84:  It’s not harsh!  My RSVP is March 6 and I’ll be doing the same thing 🙂

Post # 13
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

we started calling about 10 days after the RSVP date.  My wedding is a week before yours and we just yesterday got our RSVPs for everyone, so maybe wait until the end of the week before you make calls.

Post # 14
Member
8464 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mjwyatt84:  We sent an email about 5 days before our deadline.  It wasn’t really a “we need your RSVP” mass email though.  We individually wrote to each person, asked how they were doing, and if they would be able to make it because we’d love to see them.

Post # 16
Member
808 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

our deadline is this Saturday but this week I started following up via email, text, or phone with folks that we hadn’t heard from.  Everyone has been fine with it, especially when I say “I’m tracking down the last few RSVPs for the “final count”. 

Good luck!  I say do what you want, you’re the bride!

The topic ‘How to track down guests who havent RSVP'd by deadline?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors