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I don't think it would damage the veil at all to use the pin until the material is a very fine silk. Most tulle these days is made out of nylon and if you're careful should be pretty durable. If it was me, I'd just stick the pin in there are play with it. Even if it leaves little holes there's no way anyone's going to be able to see them.
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How do you try on a drop veil from veilshop.com? I can't use the pin or it will damage the veil, won't it? So how do I know how it will look once it's been "lifted"?