Post # 1
My brother and his wife just had a baby a few weeks ago. They are very selfish and do everything possible to be the center of attention, and thus, we are not close. My mother has informed me that they plan on baptizing the baby on July 4th. So annoying, given there is a TON of stuff going on that day. For baptisms, the custom is everyone goes to the ceremony, then a party back at the parents. My brother and his wife haven’t even mentioned this to me (I did overhear one of them telling someone else a month ago they were thinking of July 4th), mainly because they only call when they want something. I asked my mother what time so I can figure out what events I can go to besides the baptism. My mom didn’t have a clue. I know the baptism is an important family event, and my dysfunctional family will never let me hear the end of it, but given that it’s just over two weeks away on a busy holiday weekend and I still haven’t heard anything, and I would MUCH rather go to one of the several fun events I have been invited to, am I wrong to make other plans? Do I have to hold a holiday open when they haven’t even mentioned it to me?
Am I being unreasonable that they should invite people at least 3 weeks before for a holiday weekend?
Post # 3
They should mention it to you. But could you go to the baptism for a bit and then go to the other party for a while too?
Post # 4
Go to the baptism but skip the party. If anyone throws a fit just tell them you had prior comittments that came first and that they are being rude by making you break them. 😛
Post # 5
I agree with Potatoes, don’t ditch the entire event, you likely will never hear the end of it, but don’t completely give up on the other stuff you wanna do that day. Sounds obnoxious, sorry. Siblings can be hard, I’m having a lot of trouble with one of my sisters right now.
Post # 6
What if you called your brother and said, “Hey, I want to go to your baby’s baptism. What time is it at?” That way, you make a genuine effort to go, you find out what time it’s at, make your fun plans, go to the baptism, then ditch out on the party for your July 4th fun time!
Post # 7
I agree that you should try to attend the baptism itself, but that you can go to one of your other parties afterward. The 4th of July is a long day, and there will be many more to come, whereas this baptism is a one-time thing. The long term costs of not going outweigh any short term inconveniences of missing a fun party.
Post # 8
Have you even been invited yet? It sounds like you’ve just heard on the grapevine that it’s happening on that day, but you haven’t been invited. Maybe yours is one of those families where it’s assumed that if mum tells you it’s on, that means you’re invited (lots of families like that). I’d probably try to get to the baptism itself but not worry about the party afterwards if you’ve got somewhere else to be (that you were actually invited to, with notice).
Post # 9
I definitely agree with the bees that recommend going to the baptism and not the afterparty. That way you can make your appearance for family’s sake and still get to have fun later on! Good luck with your decision…sounds like your brother’s family might be a little difficult 🙁