"How's the wedding planning going?"

posted 3 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
4043 posts
Honey bee

@beeberry:  Hmm, I was planning our wedding for about 11 months an I never really got tired or sick of the questions. I figured “at least they care enough to ask.” I think it would be more awkward if no asked or mentioned anything about your wedding.

Maybe it was just me, but I really enjoyed the planning process and loved getting insights/ideas from different people (not that I used all of the ideas/tips). I think people often just want to make small talk and its something easy to fall back on. 

If you don’t like talking about it, I would recommend saying, “It’s going really well” or “things are going pretty smoothly.” No need to elaborate if you don’t want to.

ETA: I talked with co-workers (who weren’t invited) about my wedding, if they asked first. I didn’t want to come across as rude or snobby. I generally just shared small details (location, date, colors, etc) and I even showed a few of them my dress, if they asked. If they weren’t invited, I just said it was going to be a small, friends and family wedding (which it was). 

Post # 4
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@beeberry:  Ugh, I remember getting so annoyed with that! I usually just gave a vague response and changed the subject by asking the other person a question about what was going on their lives. People love to talk about themselves, even more than they like to hear about weddings!

Post # 5
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Yes, it annoys me a bit. But I try to remember that they only ask because they love me! My wedding is like 19 days away, and when people aks me how planning is going I always have to lie. Like, I want to say “I can’t wait until this damn thing is over so I can relax for three seconds,” but instead I just say “it’s going fine.”It also annoys me a little when people ask weird questions like, “Do you know where you are having it yet?” My wedding is in a little over two weeks, of course I do!

Anyway, I feel your pain. Thanks for giving me a chance ot vent too 😉

Post # 6
Member
5017 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@beeberry:  I work at a school with about 75 teachers. The majority are female and they ALWAYS ask me about it! I appreciate they care but at this point, there’s been nothing new for the past 6 months! LOL. Every time I just say, “Well everything’s basically planned!”.

Post # 7
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I think most people do it to be polite because there’s usually an assumption that if you’re planning a wedding, it must be all you’re thinking about. You’re not obligated to share any details you don’t want to though. Just say something like “it’s going great, thanks for asking!” and then change the topic by asking them about something they’ve been doing lately.

Post # 8
Hostess
2920 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

omg so annoying! FI an I were just talking about it!

Post # 9
Member
292 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

I can’t really see myself getting annoyed with it. I’m not one to talk about myself much, but I know what it’s like to be the one asking. It’s an exciting time in life and I would think they’d be giddy to talk about it. Apparently not.

Post # 10
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee

I have replied to a similar post like this before, but I totally feel you! I don’t get the question too often, but when I do, I cringe! I don’t know why. I do kind of love the attention…but at the same time I don’t really even know how to respond. Like, what about the wedding do you want to know?? Do I go into all the details? Or do I just stay vague and say that it is going fine? I don’t want to seem rude with a short response, but an extra long response can be just as rude too!

And then, I have a girl who I work with, she is a few years older than me, and she and her FI are more established…however, she always asks how my wedding is going, but I get the distinct feeling she is asking me just so she can talk about her wedding? Like, I haven’t told her any details of my wedding, hoping she will kinda take the hint…but she alwaaaays goes into it.

Like bmo88 said, I think it totally depends on the bride. I am more private about the wedding, but obviously the girl I work with has absolutely no qualms about going into every facet of her wedding.

So, unless I think the person in truly interested (like my bridesmaids), I do tend to keep all the details to myself. You are not alone!!!

Post # 11
Member
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

When a month has passed where we haven’t done any wedding planning, and every other coworker says “How’s the wedding planning going?!”  it can be a little annoying. I’m guilty of using the awful “oh, it’s going..” line a few times. 

for the most part I love talking about how things are coming together and the latest arrangement we made. If people are interested in listening, then yay!

 

Post # 13
Member
401 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@beeberry:  I think that people are just trying to be nice. It makes sense that people you don’t know well are asking you a lot, since they probably don’t know a lot about you, and are trying to make small talk. I understand that it’s awkward to talk with people who aren’t invited to your wedding about it, but I don’t think they’re being nosy. I actually think it’s really nice of them to express interest in something that you care about.

Post # 14
Member
584 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I feel like people are mostly just being nice? Like most of them are just trying to take an interest/show they care, they aren’t DESPERATE TO KNOW. So if I don’t feel like talking about it I just change the subject.

Post # 16
Member
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@beeberry:  I try not to mind being asked about wedding planning, even when it gets a bit tiresome. My problem is that I’ll usually answer truthfully (something along the lines of, “It’s going well, but there’s a lot of crap I don’t care about!”), and I get weird reactions from people because I’m not gushing about how it’s all rainbows and unicorns. 

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