(Closed) Huge rant! Need to get it off my chest, advice please.

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I’m sorry hon, it’s awfull when people get their noses where they shouldn’t and mess up our dreams. Let it all out.

I don’t think you should fight with you Fiance family but also I think you have to work better on your communication, remain calm and explain what YOU really want and since it’s your wedding they can’t do much then accept it, but it you tell them nothing and just give up, then they will end up planning your wedding, not you and your Fiance.

:::: huge hug ::::

try not to let the stress kill your joy, you are marring the man you love! And in the end, that’s what’s important.***

Post # 4
52 posts
Worker bee

I know this post was a while ago, but as I just posted a ranty post, this one popped up as a suggestion to read.

You have got to put your foot down. I have been in/to/worked for a *LOT* of weddings, and if you don’t get this off your chest now, it WILL come out a day before/day of the wedding. Don’t let yourself be bossed around like this! Is his family paying for all of it and playing the “well, we’re paying for it” card? 

There is a way to diplomatically confront them about this. Just say: With x being deployed, I feel as though I’m overwhelmed with not only that, but the wedding planning. Things have been done without me realizing what exactly is going on, and I need some help in realizing my own vision and not that of just one side of the family. I’m grateful for the help but I can’t justify having a day that isn’t truly my own, and ultimately doesn’t reflect who we are as a couple. 

You are strong, and you can do this; it is so easy to get lost in the details (I’m currently there myself lol.) At the end of the day, you are marrying the love of your life. That is what this celebration is all about. The people and the party are perks. That’s it. NO ONE ELSE matters but you two. Everyone has told me that the wedding isn’t our party but for our families…. no, it isn’t! This is a celebration of YOU TWO starting your new family and YOUR new life, and, if you are religious, it’s about placing your relationship in God. 

I had my future Mother-In-Law tell me that this was a snotty and selfish way to act. She was trying to control a lot of the wedding, too. It took a long time and good conversation with very good friends to come to the realization that: this isn’t selfish. This is me taking care of my relationship, my sanity, my fiancee, and our new life path that we have chosen. 


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