Post # 1
So we already have our hall booked for 6:30 cocktail hour. We took a long time trying to figure out what church we liked. (Neither of us belong to a church). So, in Roman Catholic churches they have specific times you can get married. We called our top two churches, and the only time slots both had were 12:30 and 1:00 pm. SO, that means even if we had full mass, there would still be a 4.5 hour gap. 🙁
What should we do! I really want people to attend our ceremony, but I don’t think they will if there is such a huge gap!
Also, should be mentioned that half of our guest list are out of towners. We do live in the Chicago suburbs, so it’s not like we are out in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do. :-/
Post # 3
Why can’t you change your reception time? have your reception start at 3?
I would not do a 4.5 gap between the ceremony and the reception. Plus, for a 1pm ceremony, most of your guests will have left their homes by 11:30 or 12, right? They won’t have eaten since breakfast and to make them wait until 6:30 for cocktail hour and THEN even later for the reception is rude.
Can you do a “lunch” somewhere? Like maybe the party room at Maggiano’s and do family style Italian? Or one of the greek restaurants? A gyros buffet?
Post # 4
I think people can figure it out. It’s a little annoying, but it’s for a once in a lifetime event. I’ve been to 2 or 3 weddings with a huge gap, we mini golfed or shopped, or seomthing. Not a big deal. Keep with waht you love. Besides, if most guest are out of towners, and that’s what they are there for, what else would they do? sit in a hotel and wait for the recpetion?? I’m sure they’d make it the ceremony too.
Post # 5
It’s my understanding that this gap is common with Catholic church ceremonies. As a guest, I wouldn’t think anything of it. And would find something to do with my extra 4.5 hours.
Post # 6
I’d come up with suggestions for what people can do to fill the gap …
Post # 7
I agree with others. This is fairly common with Catholic weddings. I recommend setting up a website with suggestions on what folks should do for 4.5 hours (mini golf, local movie theater, restaurants, etc). If people are coming from out of town then they weren’t going to be focused on anything else anyway…
Post # 8
change your reception time. I am sorry but I would be really upset with that long of a window….
Post # 9
This is generally pretty common for Catholic weddings, but it’s still very inconvenient for guests (especially OOT). The best option would be to move your reception a bit earlier. If you can’t do that, I think you should at least provide light refreshments following the ceremony so people won’t starve before the reception dinner
Post # 10
I’ll be honest, there was a 3 hour gap at the last wedding we attended and we skipped the ceremony. For OOT people it’s kind of a hassle…for us we have our dogs to think of too, as we can only be gone X amount of hours and a big gap is just kind of a waste of time.
Post # 11
I think you should do what is best for you – but as a guest I would probably skip the ceremony if there was a 4.5 hour wait… unless I lived close enough to go home and chill until it was time to head back to the reception…
Post # 12
I actually didn’t go to a wedding one time because there was a huge gap between the wedding and reception. I agree with Westwood…it’s a huge pain in the ass unless you live in the area. I know it seems a little harsh but most people don’t really want to go that badly because they really don’t want to spend an entire day at someone else’s wedding. It just becomes an obligation.
Post # 13
A gap is a gap whether it’s 2.5 or 4.5 hours – neither are really any less convenient. If your option is a church you love with 4.5 hour gap or a church you hate with 2.5, go for the church you love. Maybe you could host a little reception with snacks after somewhere so people can eat. I’ve been to gap weddings and even as an OOT guest, it’s not that annoying – in fact, sometimes I like it, that way I can change outfits and shower and nap in between. If people have somewhere close by to go (hotel or home) it shouldn’t be THAT big of a deal.
Post # 14
if you don’t belong to a church, then why are you considering a Roman Catholic church and full mass? I’m confused. and yes, your instincts are right on: the gap is too big.
Post # 15
When my cousin got married, her ceremony was around 1-2 (can’t remember exactly, I believe 2), and the reception was at 6. We just went home and got ready for the evening, had a mid afternoon snack, etc. I don’t mind it, and any out of town guests can go explore in the meantime.
Post # 16
some friends of mine got married on a Sunday morning and had the reception later in the afternoon. it gave me just enough time to get some studying and deep breathing in…my now FI’s ex was there. I even had time to grab a glass of wine and calm my nerves down. 🙂