Post # 1
I know it’s a dumb question, but I am trying to figure out budget for gifts for my friend and this one stumped me.
She’s having a shower which I am attending. She is having a DW in Jamaica in April and then is having a reception June 21. Are guests expected to bring a gift to the reception in June?
I have a budget in mind and am either going to split it in half to get her a smaller gift at shower and cash at wedding OR put it all towards a big shower gift.
I appreciate your help!
ETA: I am attending shower and reception, but NOT the wedding
Post # 3
@Skittles131: I would do a shower gift and 1 gift for the wedding/reception (they’re one event in my mind). If you’re giving cash, I would probably put it in a card and bring it to the actual wedding (presumably there’s a reception there). I wouldn’t bring another gift to the reception here – I assume that’s mostly meant for people who weren’t able to make it to Jamaica.
Post # 4
@MsGinkgo: I should have clarified I am NOT attending the wedding in Jamaica.
Post # 5
@Skittles131: Most places that people register these days will have the option to deliver the gift directly to the couple before the wedding. I think if I was giving a gift off a registery to someone who was having a destination wedding, this is what I would do. If you did this, you wouldn’t need to take a gift to the reception, and it would seem more like a “wedding” gift instead of a “reception” gift, if that’s what you’re worried about.
I know people have differing opinions on whether you need to get someone something for a shower AND the wedding, so you may get different answers about that part.
ETA: I read your post wrong. I just re-read it and changed my answer accordingly 🙂
Post # 6
@Skittles131: Same answer, different location. I would give her a shower gift and bring a wedding gift to the reception.
Post # 7
@MsGinkgo: thanks everyone! That’s what I figured…but wasn’t sure. Another thing is it’s all happening very last minute. I was told about the shower a week ago and they just registered…this morning! And the shower is tomorrow!! I’m not sure I’ll have time to pick up a gift off the registry tomorrow, but that is my goal.
Also, they just decided to do the reception June 21 which they weren’t sure if they would even do.
So that makes this even a bit more confusing.
I totally adore this friend though and really want to celebrate her very special and deserved happiness, but wasn’t exactly sure what to do in this situation.
Post # 8
@Skittles131: Bring the shower gift with you to the shower, and if you’re giving a gift that can fit into a card (cash, check, gift card) bring that to the reception. Otherwise, ship it or have it sent to their place.
Post # 9
- Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI
I agree with giving a shower gift and bringing a wedding gift to the reception.
I did that for a friend of mine who got married in Vegas. Pretty much everyone brought gifts/cards to the reception she had a few months later.
Post # 10
@Skittles131: I agree that I’d bring a gift to the shower and then bring a gift to the at-home reception, personally. (Same answer applies even if you have a gift sent straight to them from the store for their wedding/reception.) 🙂
Post # 11
I bring a boxed gift to the shower. If I don’t go, I have the registered store mail it directly to the bride’s home. For weddings I always write a check. I like to send the card and check a few weeks before the wedding, because it never fits in my purse and I don’t like carrying the envelope around. In my area – NE USA, 95-99% of wedding gifts taken to the recption come in envelopes.
Post # 12
@Skittles131: in your situation I would buy one gift for the shower because gifts are usually opened or at least displayed nicely and then I would bring a greeting card to the at home reception.
These days I send gifts ahead time for weddings and bring a card to the actual event.
Post # 13
I would do a smaller shower gift and mail the wedding gift ahead of either the wedding or the reception. People bring gifts to receptions, I fully realize, but it is considered more ideal to send ahead.
Post # 14
@Skittles131: I would try to avoid taking a gift to the reception. It is an inconvenience to someone to have to load & unload all the gifts. I would either deliver it to the house or have it delivered. I’m assuming the gifts are usually not opened at the reception.
Post # 15
I would give a shower gift, and then yes give a “wedding gift”. If it’s cash, you can bring it with you. If it’s a box gift, send it. You can do this anytime in between their wedding and at home reception.
Post # 16
@Skittles131: I tend to send my wedding gifts rather than bring them to the reception.
However, if I were going to both the shower and the reception, I would bring a gift to the shower and give them a wedding gift. Whether one prefers to bring wedding gifts to the reception or to send them directly to the couple is a personal choice, though it’s more likely not to go missing if you send it directly to them.