- 3 years ago
- Wedding: December 2012
I posted this on the wrong boards. I am PROPERLY posting it here! 😛
For those of you who have been keeping up with my story, you know a bit of this, but certainly need some advice whether to drop it and continue on like nothing happened (like SO seems to be doing). But I don’t want this to hurt us if I do drop it! RO. . .
I did something bad — I looked through my hubby’s phone on Friday night with him sitting right next to me. At first, I was looking at his games. Then he kept looking over at his phone like he was worried I was going to find something, so I looked for something he might be wanting to hide. What did I find? Naked supermodels in Google searches. I was upset slightly, since I know he can look all he want, but I’d rather pretend he didn’t. I gave him his phone back, and later on that night when he was in bed, I got up to take my OWN sexy pictures. He then got up after me, found me with his phone and basically told me I was a liar that I really only ever grabbed his phone to “snoop” and he felt like I couldn’t trust him, and because I had “snooped,” he couldn’t trust me. We’re married. My computer and phone are unlocked. I don’t care if he ever wants to look, because it’s not a big deal to me. I don’t ever want him to feel like he’s ever got anything to worry about, if there ever was a reason. Besides, I saw nothing in his phone besides half-naked Googled models. Why guard your phone like a hound dog?! Maybe he felt that I disrespected him by not asking or by feeling I needed to look in the first place, I dunno.
The next day, I got home from work, we argued, he lashed out at me, I apologized, and fifteen minutes later went to the beach with his buddies, still mad. I told myself I’d have a good time regardless. I never spoke to him, or touched him . . .but we acted civil around our friends. As soon as we got there, him and I were laughing, kissing, cuddling, eating together, sort of proding fun that he nicknamed me “Snoopy” in his phone. He password protected his PC and phone, saying we can share anything else except his phone and computer. Why does it matter? If I knew it was going to upset him, I would have simply asked. I assumed since it’s okay for me, it should be okay for him. It wasn’t. Oops. :/ Sunday we had a good time relaxing, playing video games and we had a lot of fun, if you know what I mean. . . TWICE. 😛 Monday was also good after work. He called me by my pet name a few times.
Then yesterday, he comes home after work and school (about 11 P.M.) and I tell him he needs to go to the next room so I can print out our tickets for his weekend surprise. I’m treating him to a little local getaway with an expensive hotel for one night and breakfast in bed. He asked me why, and I asked if he trusted me. Without hesitation, he said yes. This made me sigh relief. Yesterday is when I noticed a lock on his computer, and I told him he doesn’t need to lock anything from me, as I had made a mistake in not asking him first. He got very sour and told me that it was funny I allowed him on my PC and phone and such if he wanted (he doesn’t), but I had to “ask about games to see his phone and snoop.” Wrong — if I really wanted to snoop to begin with, your phone was never locked beforehand, and was always on the counter if I REALLY wanted to look.
Regardless, it doesn’t seem to matter what I say. . .I’m not making the situation any better. He seems to think I’m still lying even though it really makes no sense. He wasn’t upset until I brought the topic up, but I really cannot bare to think our relationship is in an upset in any shape or form. It seems like I should just leave it alone, because he’s better off not arguing about what I am and am not. Perhaps he was in a drained mood because he went to work and school (just like tonight). He becomes very mad and distant and will literally ignore me when I try to talk about it, and I simply don’t want to disrupt things further from something that has happened a half week ago. If he doesn’t want to understand my side of things, then I guess there isn’t much that can be done other than doing my own thing, is there?