Husband wants to hang out with Mother In-Law week after wedding – Help!

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2825 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Awww, honey I understand. My advice is to let it go. She’ll be going home soon and your honeymoon is right around the corner. After that, you’ll have your man all to yourself! I think it’s not ideal at all for his mom to be hanging around. You’re newlyweds, you deserve to be alone and I’d think any adult would understand that. But, this apparently means a lot to him, so I would try not to nag him about it and just wait it out. 

Post # 4
Member
596 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Stargazer11:  I can understand wanting that alone time as newlyweds. But if its only going to be a couple of more days and she’s going back home, I say let him have his time with her. Especially since he’s feeling like this might be his last bonding time with her. You have your entire life to spend with him. And especially your honeymoon. I would just make this a special, comfortable visit for his mother until she leaves. 

I really do understand. My FI spends so much time and does everything for his parents that it cuts into our time together. I do get frustrated. But that’s because he’s dad is very ill and don’t know how much time he’ll be with us and his mom is 75. We are also moving 5 hours away from them next week. So I just hang in there, spend time with them as well, so at least FI and I are doing things together at least and remind myself we are moving and getting married. I don’t want to take away his moments with his parents and want him to feel like he did all he can before they pass. And I don’t want to get in the way of that. 

Post # 5
Member
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Stargazer11:  I understand both points of view! It’s a very difficult situation for you and for him. Try to make the best of the situation, and take comfort in knowing that her visit will be over soon and you and your hubby can spend lots of quality of time together!

Post # 6
Member
381 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Stargazer11 Yeah, my DH did this with his mother. Mind you, she flew in from China, but she stayed at my mom’s house for a week and I spent all that time driving her all over the area and taking her sightseeing and taking her out to dinner. Not only did I not get to spend time with DH alone, I also didn’t really get to spend time with other people, I was so preoccuppied with her. And tired! I fell asleep during one of our tours around town.

I was, admittedly, really irritated, but as PP said, it was only temporary. Also, doing something selfless like this early in the marriage will for SURE get your marriage off on the right foot! Hugs, it will all be ok! 

Post # 7
Member
608 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Stargazer11:  wow….yes you are being a bit of a baby…sorry I am not trying to be mean…your husband is absolutlely correct and time is short…I am guessing he is a bit older than you perhaps? As you get older and you see people around you passing away or getting sick you really really realize how short life it.

Post # 8
Member
8701 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

You need to let this go. I am assuming she flew out for your wedding — Let him have this time with his mother. You have the rest of your lives to spend together. He doesn’t have that with his mother, and if she flew/drove/whatever to see you guys, let him have this.

What’s a few more days in the grand scope of the rest of your lives?

Chill. Let it go — She’s your mother in law.

Post # 10
Member
3200 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@Overjoyed:  +1

In the grand scheme of things he’s right, you never know how long we will have our parents for.  He’s given you the rest of his life.  Give him this and in no time she’ll go back home and you will be on your honeymoon.

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