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I think your professional and legal names should be the same, but it's absolutely possible to be Dr. Mine-His at work and "Oh, just call me Divergirl His" socially. My MIL hyphenated her name, but almost no one uses the full name, and she choose to be First His on our wedding invites.
I also know several people who go by First HisLast socially and First Maiden HisLast professionally (without the hyphen), which is another option that might make it simpler on the legal front.
I've been having this same problem... already have a BA and MFA with my maiden name, and I'm an actress/artist. My parents are entertainers too, and took a lot of care giving me a fantastic name was I was born, just so I wouldn't ever have to change it if I decided to "get famous," hahaha.
My FI is performer as well, and completely understands my feelings on the subject. So I've decided to do as the Europeans do, and make my maiden name my 2nd middle name, and his last name my last name.
So professionally I'll be maiden name.
And personally I'll be Mrs MyName (MyMaidenName) HisLastName.
... I think, haha. I have two months to decide!!
You will probably have to change your name to the hypenated name legally in order to get your degrees in that name, they won't give it to a name that you aren't legally known as. You can socially go by whatever name you want.
I am essentially doing what MissHay is thinking of. Legally I am MyFirst MyMiddle MyLast HisLAst, but still go by my maiden name professionally (I verified with my professional board that this was legal). Socially I go by MyFirst MyMaiden HisLast. I have had no problems about this professionally. The problem with hyphenating is that your legal last name requires BOTH. I didn't want to hyphenate because in my mind, then we still don't have the same last name. I am very happy with my choice EXCEPT:
1. People want to leave out my maiden name, which aggravates me to no end! My name is my choice.
2. When people are looking up you by last name, you never know which name they filed it under.
just a note, some states won't let you have two middle names on your drivers liscense. so you either have to get rid of your middle name altogether, or hyphenate yourlast-hislast.
Good point. SS was fine, but even with that card, the DMV wouldn't let me put my maiden name on it.
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So when I get married, I planned on hypanating my maiden name and his last name. The reason for doing this was only because I have 2 degrees with my maiden name, and I'm planning on getting a Ph.D which will be after I get married. Do you know if it's possible for me to personally to go by his name, but professionally by the hyphanated name? Do you have to pick one? Which one do I have to pick legally?