I accidentally ruined the surprise proposal

posted 3 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
226 posts
Helper bee

hey 🙂

 

don’t sweat it, I know it seems like a HUGE deal, because you’ve been waiting for this a long time. Speak to your SO again when he calms down, highlight how much you love him and want to get married to him, and tell him if he doesn’t want to do it on sunday to hold on to the ring for a few more days/weeks and to suprise you at another time 😀 (I know a few weeks seems long, but hey if it makes him feel better, and you know you’re getting engaged anyways, what the heck!)

 

OH, and congrats on your future proposal 😀

Post # 4
Member
6812 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Uhm, HE ruined the surprise. Instead of getting pissed and spoiling the secret, he should have just said that he had something planned and that if after this weekend, you still need to clear your head, you can go to your sister’s next weekend. Also, it’s his fault for not discussing with you that he had every intention of marrying you, if you would just be patient. The only thing I fault you for is for being impatient and not trusting your man.

You have to understand that the proposal isn’t just about you and isn’t just a big deal for girls. It’s a big deal for guys, too. He clearly had something planned and now he’s spoiled it, so you need to get over the fact that it’s ruined, stop being upset about it and maybe plan your own special surprise and ask HIM to ask you to marry him – other bees have done it before and Monica proposed to Chandler on Friends :).

Post # 5
Member
1981 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

He’s the one who let the cat out of the bag- not you.  If you don’t want to wait, then just go on the hike on Sunday.  I was in a similar situation while waiting and 100% KNEW FI was proposing on our Cancun trip-  I was stressed out about it and thought it was ruined.  You know what?  It wasn’t ruined- I was on cloud 9 when it happened and it was amazing.  I’d tell him that he needs to put his big boy pants on and propose as planned.  What’s the alternative?  Make you wait even longer?  That really doesn’t seem fair to you. 

Post # 7
Member
2302 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

yeah he didn’t need to be such an ass about it. if, instead of letting you go to bed crying, he’d given you a hug and a kiss, tucked you in and told you that he had every intention of marrying you, none of this would have happened. 

he’s being rude about it in my opinion, if he knew he was going to propose, why on earth would he have shut down and been so mean to you about it? to the point that you cried? he could clearly have said ‘i definitely want to marry you, what do you think about x?’ and not ruined anything. 

so no. you didn’t ruin anything. 

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