I AM PROPOSING TO HIM! PICTURES! ( all feedback and comments welcome)

posted 1 year ago in DIY
Member
8281 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

To be honest, I think it is very early to be engaged but you know your life better than us.  Your proposal plan does sound (and look) amazing. Good luck!

PS. Met my DH on POF site too. It’s not that bad.

Member
1612 posts
Bumble bee

Youre lucky yours will let you propose. I tried already and it was a big fat nope. Well it was yes then no which was even more maddening. Though I wasn’t nearly as creative. Good luck girly! I hope yours isnt all machismo like mine about it

Member
6304 posts
Bee Keeper

My main concern isn’t so much that it’s too soon. More so that you two are so young, but mostly that you might be stealing his thunder a bit. If it were me, I’d find a way to bring up a situation in which some woman on TV or a fictional acquaintance or distant cousin proposed to her man. If he says something about how brave and empowering or cool that is,  then you’re probably fine to proceed. If he says something about how the guy must be really embarrassed, or devastated that she “took” that from him, or that it’s weird or whatever, I’d abort mission. Basically, try and gauge his feelings for your idea indirectly before you actually do it. If he has always dreamed of the way he would propose to the woman of his dreams, he might actually resent you for being so bold.

I’m not saying don’t do it, and I’m not saying it’s a bad idea (because it’s actually really cute!) but I’d definitely try and do a little subtle investigating before you go full-on Sadie Hawkins. You never know, he might already have a ring and a plan for you!

Member
521 posts
Busy bee

Congratulations on taking this step. I think it is a great idea, and I can see the love that you have for him. 

Member
176 posts
Blushing bee

@octohands:  I love this. I love love love this. You are a girl after my own heart. Had my FI not proposed this is very similar to something I would have done, I love making things and adore scavenger hunts. It is funny I have a new look on online dating. I met my FI on Ok cupid. I was 22 and he was 26 (a year and 8 months ago). He is the sweetest boy I could have ever asked for. He still opens doors for me and shows up to my work with flowers and lunch. I make his lunch every day too! We got engaged after only about a year and 2 months but started talking about marriage very very early on. You know when you know and don’t let any one tell you any different. The only question which really isn’t even any of my concern, is about PTSD. Not only being in the Military but because he has gone through such a traumatic experience losing his brothers. I am so sorry to hear his heart breaking story and feel deeply for his family. Has he ever displayed signs? Not that that would be cause to ever give up on a relationship but just something to be aware of and know that if it is an issue that it is something you are willing to work through. Congrats!! How could he say no?!?

Member
4413 posts
Honey bee

@octohands:  I think you did great! I can understand your concerns though.  I never understood why a woman couldn’t propose to a man. Why is it that we as women have to wait for someone to propose to us? if we found one we want to keep we should be able to ask just as a man would. Your plan is amazing and way more creative than I would have ever been able to be. I also wouldn’t have proposed though because well, it’s just not me I guess. But more power to ya sister! I think that you are young but you did say that you will have a long engagement so I don’t feel you are jumping the gun or anything. I hope this goes well for you!

Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee

@octohands:  I know a girl who met her now husband in October…engaged in January…and married in April. When you know they are the one, you just know. They have a beautiful son and are living happily. It happens. Best of luck(:

Member
1016 posts
Bumble bee

That’s awesome! I wish i had the balls to do that! Good luck! Keep us posted

Member
8154 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@octohands:  Amazing story!  It sounds as though you’ve found your perfect love.  I’m also impressed with your creativity.  I agree that it’s ok for a woman to propose to a man, especially in your case, because he certainly seems very eager to marry you.  I hope it all goes well for you, blessings to you both.  :)

Member
3673 posts
Sugar bee

There’s nothing wrong with the woman doing the proposing, but I don’t know that the combination of you doing the proposing AND buying your own ring is a good idea.

I think your age and having been together for only 6 months is another concern, but I don’t know how to phrase it without it sounding like a lecture, so I’ll leave it at that.

Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee

I think your idea is wonderful, all of the details and it’s obvious you two have a good relationship but…

 

If you do get engaged, please wait a few YEARS not a few MONTHS. The divorce rate is extremely high, and a lot of this has to do with getting married at such a young age.

 

You cange so much in your early 20s, you still haven’t fully learned who you are as a person and neither has he. You grow and change and you may grow in different directions, or you may grow together there is no telling where your life is headed just yet. I’m not saying don’t propose, I think your idea is beautiful and if you do propose at least you know your relationship is on the same page. But put off the wedding for a few years. And that will give you time anyways to plan a spectacular wedding

Member
7060 posts
Busy Beekeeper

It looks like a very sweet and heartfelt proposal!  I hope it goes well.  

I would *never* want to propose, or be proposed to, after only a few months, personally.  I think it takes at least 1.5-2 years to get out of the honeymoon stage and really see how you fit together as a couple for life.

But each to their own.  Good luck!

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