Post # 1
So the other day, FI and I were at his parents’ place having dinner with the family, and FI’s mom said “OK, look what I got for you guys!” and came out with a huge (600 gram) chocolate bunny for easter. I thought it was a little funny that she bought a chocolate bunny for FI and me, *and* his sister and her husband to share, but I get it – the thing is comically large, probably expensive, and there’s no way two of us could eat the whole thing.
So then the next day, the six of us are having dinner at our house, and FI’s mom says “Oh, I brought your chocolate for you. We measured it out carefully; don’t worry, there are exactly 200 grams in there!” I was like “Huh? I thought you said that thing was 600 grams?” (ie we should have 300) and she just explained that, no no no, I am mistaken, she said it was for everyone to share and split it three ways to the three couples (parents, FI and me, SIL and her husband).
What the eff?
Let me just clarify here: I have no issue with sharing the giant chocolate bunny and am not pissed about not getting as much chocolate as I was originally “promised”, nor do I expect to be given anything. I just think the whole thing is super weird and really ruins the spirit of gift giving. If I were in my MIL’s position, I would have done something along the lines of “OMG. So I found this hilariously large chocolate bunny and couldn’t resist buying it, but there is no way we’re going to eat it all of it. Can I offer you some to take home?” Instead, she presented it as this wonderful thing she had selflessly done for us. A present. I bought you a bunny! Actually, you only get the ears. But wasn’t that nice of me?
If it’s completely obvious that you’re just giving a gift for the gratitude, it really ruins the sentiment, in my opinion. I am so bothered by it I would just rather not recieve anything. The irony is that if she had been gracious instead of trying to solicit appreciation from everyone, we would have acually appreciated it instead of feeling resentful.
It kind of reminds me of of a post I saw a while ago asking if it’s rude to bring half (or what’s left of) a pie to a dinner party. “Oh I made it just for you!” lol. How do people not get this? Am I crazy, or does anyone else feel this way?
Post # 3
To be honest, I think you’re reading too much into it.
Post # 4
I think you’re overthinking this. Sometimes a giant chocolate bunny is just a giant chocolate bunny.
Post # 5
Lol this cracks me up.
I think this is way different from bringing a half eaten pie somewhere.
It’s just a chocolate bunny. It’s funny!
Post # 6
@geekspice: Hehe, yes, of course. I’m talking about how some people are unable to give something without trying to solicit gratitude for it, and how that ruins the gift. The bunny is just an illustration of the general concept.
Post # 7
Mmmm makes me wanna eat my chocolate bunny… Excuse me >:}
Post # 8
I don’t see a problem here. I also don’t see where she tried to solicit gratitude for it? Seems like she just brought over your piece?
Post # 9
@Junip3r: hahaha I’m not sure what to think here… but I do think its comical!
I dunno if she’s doing it for gratitude… maybe she just wanted to include everyone so as to not make anyone feel left out? I think its a bit strange to label it a gift when its split so many ways…
she probably should have just bought it to show it to y’all and then said “lets share!”
Post # 10
Sounds like things families do. Welcome to the family. My mom would totally have done something like this.
Post # 11
Haha I get it. I’m the oldest of 5 and my bday is close to xmas, 2 days before. My parents bought me awesome gifts, but I was expected to share my toys with siblings. “Oh we bought you a password journal, Now let your sister play too”. Haha yeah I get it, she could have taken a pic and bought you smaller bunnies lol
Post # 12
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I think you’re defintely overthinking this. Families work in these ways. Just enjoy the humor and let it go (and expect similar things to happen again).
Post # 13
@KimmySumShuga: That’s exactly my point. Instead of just explaining that she bought it for everyone to share, she presented it as a gift, because it’s important for her to be thanked.
I do realize that it may sound like I’m reading too far into it and she didn’t mean to present it as a gift, but this is something she does a lot, and everyone else agreed and was similarly miffed by it. If it has never happened to you, then that’s awesome.
@HisIrishPrincess: Would your mom totally also say something like “you’re welcome for the leftovers I gave you yesterday”. After you had already thanked her? Or even if you hadn’t thanked her at all? My mom wouldn’t. But FI’s mom would. I really hope that’s not a thing “families do”.
Post # 14
While, its true, you may be overthinking things, I’m a fellow “obsessive” thinking bee (and I mean that complimentary), and I probably would have had the same thoughts!
Post # 15
@Junip3r: ooo. families dont do that. that’s bizzare.
Post # 16
Makes me think of this! I think you are reading a little too much into and should try to see the humor in it!