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:( I'm sorry! Not sure what to tell you other than to hang tight; the year is almost over.
no advice here either but i'm sure you'll get your proposal when the time is right or when you least exect it:)
Aw... just chill a bit. I bet he has something planned and he just wants you to forget about it so he can surprise you. :)
Oh man.. I know it's hard to not loose your mind while waiting. For sure. I've got no good advice, I lost my cool a lot. Here's a funny one for you:
In August we were packing up our condo to move to an apartment while building our house this fall. Boyfriend mentioned that maybe we should drink that bottle of champagne we've had floating around the hosue for a year now. Before even blinking I shot back "What, do you think we'll have something to celebrate soon, like maybe finally getting engaged?" with a super snarky attitude... um, yeah. He was planning on proposing the next day.
Corgi, I am chilling or at least trying to. But I like to have some type of control over my future, I feel like I can't do anything but wait!!
Ah don't worry, I found I was making myself even more miserable by keeping everything cooped up. Now that I know I can still look at shiny rings with him there (window shopping) and just not pester him, it makes it a bit more bearable! Rather than a ban I'm seeing the Xmas challenge as keeping it to a minimum...I'm such a loser lol
The harder you push, the more he's going to pull away. Especially if you're yelling and turning into someone other than the girl he fell for originally. Harsh, but true. He sounds like so far he's dealing with it well, but you really do need to trust his timing. Trust me, I understand the panic over planning an August 2010 wedding! I'm trying to do the same thing but we won't get engaged til January at the earliest. A wedding can be pulled together in 3 months and if I have to do that, so be it. What's important is that I get to marry him!
Chaotic bliss- Unfortunately you can't do anything but wait. I'm sorry you feel like he is pulling your chain. Believe me my FI did the same thing to me and I often would get upset with him. He would always say something like "you are really a good catch and I'm so lucky to have caught you." Cheesy I know!
My worst break down was on our trip to Hawaii. We had gone to watch the sunrise on the beach. No one else around it was perfect! He made the comment that this would be the perfect place to propose! Excuse me?! So I said well why don't you? He said I've been thinking about it but I want to wait. That's when I lost it. We had been dating for 3 years, we are in our 30's and it's time! I felt like a complete a*! when the next day he took me ring shopping and explained that he was waiting until after my brother's wedding so that we didn't overshadow their big day. Their wedding was the following week.
So be calm. Guys have things planned out and he's just waiting on the perfect time. Some guys like to have the ring paid for before they ask so maybe that's his hang up. Maybe he's waiting to talk to your dad. Who knows. But try to be patient... the last thing you want is to scare him being crazygirl!
((HUGS)) Trust me I am there with you... I have no advise other than it sounds like he has a plan and you don't have to bring it up (that's what M tells me all the time). i sometimes get really panicked thinking OMG am I wasting my time, omg he better ask i don't want to think i have wasted all this time waiting for him when i could be "doing me". with that being said, i think m is worth waiting for. i adore him, and i love us together. we are such a great and fun and funny couple (except when it comes to this). however, i do have a time period in my head (and he knows it as well) where we will have a discussion about the direction of our relationship. it won't be an ultimatum, more of a "look we have been together x amt of time and i need to know where our relationship is heading because i feel like you are leading me on." our relationship is beginning to end its life span in its current state and i may not be around for the next six months if we don't move forward. what is your opinion on this....
this isn' t necessarily giving him (or m) an ultimatum just kind of letting the him know you will not wait forever for him to decide, but also not necessarily giving him an ultimatum.
Thanks ladies!
And Vinatge2010 and Crebre80 you ladies are correct! Maybe he does have a plan, I am just not patient at all!
I am 100 percent with Crebre80 on this one. And yes, he didn't really answer your question either imho.
But I do think he loves you. But you also need to know the direction of things and where is this going. That is most important imho knowing the intent. The whole where.is.this.going. It has to be addressed and I think you did ok for breaking the waiting bees' vow.
@chaotic: how long have y'all been together? i swear it takes guys time to get used to the thought: okay i want to marry this woman and give her my last name and okay it's time to shop for a ring. the good thing is after that period, it seems like they buy the ring and propose within a week! so we just have to get over this initial yep i'm going to purchase a ring.. d'oh i have to look for and buy one now...
Eggsactkly Crebre80!
He's probably shaking his head going D'Oh!!!!!!!
ohhh that's so hard. it's difficult waiting and wondering, trust me when i say i was in your shoes. good things do happen, in time. but just remember, you don't want to look back on your engagement feeling iike it wasn't a good experience because you both were stressed out. hang in there!
I love you ladies!! We have been together <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">don't scream 4 years but if it makes things any better I am 26 and he is 28.
But I need a precise answer, I am not asking him what date is he planning on proposing and I actually think he will but I want to know if it will be by the end of the year!
Honestly, I didn't think that I would ever want to get married but I just caught the wedding bug in Feb 09.
I really do love you guys!!!
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AND BROKE THE XMAS CHALLENGE! I am so sowry! I tried and I was doing good but I couldn't help it so I sent him an email! I couldn't even talk about about it literally--I had to send an email asking him to let me know are his future plans with me. The funny part about this is, I was looking right at him while I was typing the email.
Anyway, in the email I adressed the timing I will need to plan a wedding, he knows the date that I want and right now this engagement seems so far fetched! (He has asked me what month did I want to get married, I told him Aug 2010.)
After he read the email the morning he texted me: "I just hope you trust the fact that we will be okay. I know you love me and know that you feel some kind of (negative) way about our future engagement. But we will make it bae, don't we always? "
My reponse: "Why do you keep saying that?" I trust you but you don't never give an answer to my questions. So yes, I am a bit concerned!
I am like HUH?! WTF?! All I want is a definite, yes babe it is a possiblity we will be engaged by the end of the year or no sweetie, we won't be able to make that happen!! But instead he text me some BS....
So am I back at square one and I failed the xmas challenge! Sorry ladies! I need encouraging words....